Food Addiction, Trauma & Recovery: Sammie Lee's Story Will Change How You See Weight Loss

Look for the why behind the food

Content warning: this episode and blog discuss childhood sexual abuse, suicide and eating disorders. If any of this brings something up for you, please reach out for support. The Butterfly Foundation helpline is 1800 33 4673, Lifeline is 13 11 14 and 1800RESPECT is 1800 737 732. If you're in immediate danger, call 000.

TL;DR

• Sammie believes food addictions and eating disorders are a way of coping with unmet emotional needs, trauma and suffering.
• What you model, you program. Children pick up how we treat food and our bodies.
• A quick fix can change the body without changing the heart and mind.
• If you still want the cookie, have one or two mindfully, and skip the shame.
• Check in with yourself every day, and work on the one thing that's troubling you.

Introduction

I'd been wanting to have a conversation about food addiction, and then Sammie Lee popped up at the perfect time. Sammie is an eating disorder recovery coach in Melbourne who also runs workshops and speaks publicly. She knows this field from the inside.

At the start, Sammie said she likes to tell people that triggers are a gateway to healing. They're an opportunity to explore the parts we've suppressed, in a safe environment. Please look after yourself while reading.

Please note: this blog shares Sammie's lived experience and views. It's for general information only and isn't medical, psychological or dietary advice. If you're struggling with food, your body or your mental health, please speak with your GP, a psychologist or a qualified eating disorder clinician. Don't stop or change any prescribed medication without talking to your doctor.

Lesson 1: Addiction often starts with unaddressed wounds

Insight: When I said the word addiction, Sammie's answer was unaddressed wounds. Whether it's food, drugs or alcohol, she believes there's always pain or suffering underneath that we've never been able to look at.

Sammie shared her own story with real courage. She was raised by her grandparents, and from a very young age she was sexually abused by a family member. As a loud, bubbly child, she often heard that nobody wanted to hear her, and she came to believe she shouldn't be heard. With no safe way to express what was happening, food became her source of comfort and control.

As a teenager, the abuse escalated. Her relationship with food flipped to restriction, because she felt her body wasn't worthy of anything, including nourishment. Over the years, she experienced almost every kind of eating disorder, spent time in hospital and became very unwell. At 12, she attempted to take her life, and a homeless man stepped in and saved her. She said it was one of the first times she felt somebody believed she deserved to be here.

Action: If you notice a pattern with food, get curious about what it might be helping you cope with, and consider talking it through with a professional.

Outcome: You start looking at the cause, not just the behaviour.

Lesson 2: What you model, you program

Insight: Sammie works with parents as well as people who are struggling, because she believes parents play a huge role, and can also be the key to their child's healing. How you talk about your body, how you eat and how you handle your emotions are all picked up by your kids, often without anyone realising.

She grew up around comments on how much she was eating, and a mum who still struggles with body image and dieting. But she says the beliefs you grew up with don't have to hold you. If you're able to shift your perspective and work through them, you can create a completely different life.

Action: Notice how you talk about food and your body in front of the people around you this week.

Outcome: You model a healthier relationship for the next generation.

Lesson 3: Quick fixes don't heal the why

Insight: We spoke about weight-loss surgery and medications like Ozempic. My view is they can change the body, but not always the heart and mind. It's not that they're bad. It's that people need mental health support, realistic expectations and community around them.

Sammie's concern is that people expect a quick fix to make them happy, and when they get there, the feelings are often still there. She also believes clinical systems often focus on food and weight, when the real issue is the emotional need underneath. What changed things for her was someone who asked what had happened to her, rather than focusing on the numbers.

She thinks there are many approaches to explore, and the key is getting honest with yourself about why you want the change. That needs a safe space, and someone asking the right questions without staying on the surface.

Action: If you're considering a medical weight-loss option, talk it through with your doctor, and think about who could support you mentally and emotionally along the way.

Outcome: Whatever path you choose, you're supported as a whole person.

Lesson 4: Have the cookie, mindfully

Insight: I love cookies. When I crave them, I ask myself why, and most of the time that works. When it doesn't, I'm having one or two instead of the whole bag.

Sammie agrees. Take a second first. If you still want the cookie, have one or two, rather than taking the whole container to the couch. She used to sit with a whole tub of ice cream, and putting a couple of scoops in a bowl made all the difference. If you're still not satisfied, that's a sign there's some deeper work to do.

She also warns against labelling foods as good or bad. Shame and guilt don't need to be there, and they can spread into how you see yourself in every part of your life.

Action: Next time you crave something, pause, serve a portion and eat it without your phone or TV.

Outcome: You enjoy the food and learn more about what you actually need.

Lesson 5: Know your core values

Insight: For Sammie, core values are individual, a no-brainer you don't want to falter from. She thinks many of us drift from them through people-pleasing. When we hold strong boundaries around them, we find freedom and peace, because we're being our most authentic selves.

One of hers is honesty. She wants friends who'll tell her when a top doesn't suit her, and she'll gently show the people she loves other perspectives on their choices.

What I took from this is that core values come down to knowing yourself. A lot of people get disheartened when they don't know theirs, but they're simply who you are and what you want.

Action: Write down one value you'd never want to compromise on, and one place you've been bending it to keep others happy.

Outcome: You start living closer to who you really are.

Lesson 6: Keep routines flexible

Insight: As a PT, I lean on routines to build habits. Sammie isn't against routines, but she says the problem is strictness. If stepping outside a routine makes you feel like you've failed, something needs exploring.

She sees this most with rigid meal plans in eating disorder recovery, where any deviation can feel like failure. I'm not a fan of meal plans for the general public either. When someone asks to be told exactly what to eat, it's worth asking why they need that.

Sammie also doesn't like calorie counting. She says it can pull you away from what feels good for your body, and lead to thinking you have to burn food off. She'd rather focus on which foods give you energy and which leave you sluggish, and which kinds of movement you actually enjoy.

Action: Pick one rule in your routine, and ask whether it's helping you or controlling you.

Outcome: Your habits support you instead of becoming another trap.

Lesson 7: Check in with yourself every day

Insight: I asked Sammie what one thing she'd get everyone in Australia to do. Her answer was to be present, and to check in with yourself daily. Look at the one thing that's troubling you that day, and work on it. She believes we're here to evolve, and if everyone did this, the world would be a different place.

She uses many tools, including journaling, meditation and monthly breathwork sessions. Her advice is to use whatever feels aligned and has a positive impact.

Sammie never imagined she'd be where she is now, five years ago. Today she speaks publicly and runs workshops, and she believes anything is possible if you do the work to get there.

Action: Tonight, ask yourself what one thing is weighing on you today, and take one small step on it.

Outcome: You stop carrying things around unexamined.

Quick wins

• Treat triggers as information, not the end of the world.
• Notice what you're modelling for the people around you.
• Pause before a craving, then serve a portion and enjoy it.
• Drop the good food and bad food labels.
• Check in with yourself once a day.

Closing insight

Sammie's story is a powerful reminder that food is rarely just about food. Underneath cravings, restriction or a search for a quick fix, there's often something that needs to be heard. Her recovery started when someone asked what had happened to her. If you're struggling, you deserve that kind of support too, and it's never too late to reach out.

Connect with Sammie

You can find Sammie on Instagram, where she shares her workshops and masterclasses. For speaking events, you can find her on CrowdPleaser.

Listen to the full episode

The full conversation is on Spotify, Apple Podcasts and YouTube, or press play at the top of this page.

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