How to Take Action When You Know What to Do but Feel Stuck

Corbin Bruckshaw joins The True Form Podcast to explore personal values, the self-improvement trap and building the confidence to begin.

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TL;DR

• Give each day a focus: Dave’s B7 framework turns broad personal-growth ideas into a weekly rhythm you can remember.

• Notice before you change: Watch your self-talk and behaviour, then give yourself a practical next step rather than another motivational speech.

• Make room for more than work: Quiet, gratitude, forgiveness and time with people you love all have a place in Dave’s week.

• Treat growth as practice: The useful question is not just who you want to become, but whether today’s choices move you in that direction.

  🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts. 

You know what to do. So why aren’t you doing it?

You’ve read the book. You’ve listened to the podcast. You’ve made the plan, bought the gym gear or saved another video that explains exactly what you need to do next. But when it comes time to actually do it, something gets in the way.

That gap between knowing and doing was at the centre of my conversation with Corbin Bruckshaw, a behavioural coach and founder of Let’s Get Human. His interest in understanding people started early, through family challenges, feeling like an outsider and finding his way into personal-development books.

What interested me most wasn’t just the ideas he had collected. It was the question of how he put them into practice, and where he had struggled to do that himself.

Corbin spoke openly about being afraid of getting things wrong. Despite years of learning, he had still questioned whether he was ready to put himself out there.

If you’re wondering how to take action on something you keep putting off, that tension is worth exploring. Is the goal genuinely yours? Are you missing a skill or a workable plan? Or have you reached the point where another round of preparation is delaying a small step you could take now?

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Look at what your life currently reflects

One of the most useful parts of this conversation was Corbin’s approach to exploring values. Rather than starting with a list of impressive-sounding qualities, he suggested looking at four areas: space, time, energy and money.

What do you surround yourself with and actually use? Where does your time go? What do you find engaging? Where are you choosing to spend the money available to you?

I liked this because it moves the conversation away from who we think we should be and towards what is happening right now. It is easy to write “health”, “family” or “financial freedom” on a page. Looking at an ordinary week gives you something more concrete to work with.

That does not make your calendar or bank statement a perfect measure of what you care about. Work, caring responsibilities and limited resources can shape your choices. I would use this as a reflection exercise, not a verdict on your character.

• Try this: Look back over the last seven days. Write down where your discretionary time and money went, what held your attention and what you would like to make more room for.

• What this gives you: A clearer starting point. Instead of telling yourself to become a completely different person, you can identify one gap between your current routine and the life you want to build.

Connect the goal to something that matters to you

A recurring question in the episode was whose expectations we are trying to meet. Are we choosing something because it matters to us, or because it looks like the thing we should want?

This comes up in fitness all the time. Someone might arrive with a target weight, but the number is only part of the story. What would reaching that goal allow them to do? What would they like to feel more capable of?

Corbin’s suggestion was to connect a goal with something the person already values. In a fitness context, that might mean thinking about the role movement could play in family life, independence or doing an activity you enjoy.

The point is not that a meaningful reason makes every session enjoyable. It is that “I should exercise” and “I want to be able to do this particular thing” give you different starting points for planning.

• Try this: Finish the sentence: “I want to work towards this because it would help me…” Keep going until the answer means something to you, rather than sounding like something you should say.

• What this gives you: A reason to return to when the initial excitement wears off. It may also help you realise that the goal needs adjusting, rather than that you need another lecture about discipline.

Notice when learning becomes a way of delaying

I asked Corbin why he had taken action rather than getting caught in an endless cycle of books, seminars and podcasts. It led to one of the most honest parts of the conversation.

He described wanting to know his subject thoroughly before speaking publicly or helping people. He did not want to be someone who read a book and immediately started presenting himself as an authority.

There is something important in that. Preparation matters, and some work requires formal training, qualifications or supervision. Taking action should not mean pretending you have expertise you have not developed.

But Corbin also recognised that he had waited longer than he now wished he had. At some point, learning had become tangled up with his fear of being wrong.

That is the self-improvement trap I would watch for: repeatedly preparing for an action without ever making room to try it.

• Try this: Before you save another resource on the same topic, choose one idea from something you have already learned. Apply it to a small, appropriate task this week.

• What this gives you: Something to learn from beyond another explanation. You can see what helped, what was unclear and what you genuinely need to understand better before the next step.

Build confidence without demanding certainty

Corbin described the question that had held him back: “But what if I get it wrong?” I think that is a more useful place to start than assuming someone who has not acted simply does not care enough.

In his case, the subject clearly mattered to him. That did not stop him from worrying about how well he could do the work.

Later, he put it this way: “Confidence comes from competence.” His explanation focused on knowing your work and developing experience through doing it repeatedly.

My takeaway is not that you should ignore doubt. It is that you can ask a more specific question of it. Is there a skill you genuinely need to develop? Is there a risk you need to manage? Or are you asking for a level of certainty that a small first attempt cannot provide?

Learning more and taking action are not opposites. A sensible first step can include practice, feedback and clear limits on what you are ready to do.

• Try this: Choose a low-stakes version of the thing you have been avoiding. Practise the conversation, make the first draft or test the idea on a small scale.

• What this gives you: A way to assess your readiness through experience. You are not committing to having everything figured out; you are finding out what the next step requires.

Make the action smaller, not the ambition

When we brought the conversation back to building habits, Corbin used deliberately simple examples. Picking up one item in a messy room. Putting on workout clothes. Getting to the gym and doing a short session.

The scale of the first action was not the point. Following through was.

I shared an example of people I had spoken to at the gym who were initially building the habit of simply turning up. They were not trying to make every visit an impressive workout. They were working on making the place part of their routine.

That connected with something else we discussed: expecting your first day to look like someone else’s ten-year result. If that is the standard, your own starting point can feel disappointing before you have even begun.

You can have a meaningful long-term goal without making the first step enormous. A manageable beginning gives you something to build on.

• Try this: Choose the smallest useful version of your next action and decide when you will do it. That might be a short walk, opening the document and writing a paragraph, or sending one thoughtful email.

• What this gives you: A clearer commitment than “I need to do better”. After you follow through, you can decide what to repeat or increase rather than trying to change everything at once.

Learn from people without comparing your starting points

Towards the end, we talked about finding mentors and getting into environments where people are doing things you would like to learn.

Corbin’s starting point was not an expensive seminar or access to a well-known mentor. As he put it: “I didn’t start there. I started with books.”

He described doing his own learning, meeting people and researching those he hoped to learn from. When he approached someone for help, he wanted to show that he had already made an effort and had something thoughtful to bring to the conversation.

I also shared how being around people doing things I had previously thought were out of reach had changed my perspective. There is a difference between using someone else’s experience to expand your view and using it to criticise where you are now.

You do not have to match their experience before you can learn from them. You can arrive curious, prepared and honest about where you are starting.

• Try this: Pick one person whose work you respect. Read or listen to something they have shared publicly, apply one useful idea, then formulate a specific question if you decide to reach out.

• What this gives you: A more purposeful approach to learning and connection. Rather than asking someone to work out your whole direction, you bring them a question you have taken time to consider.

Quick wins to try this week

You do not need to turn every idea in this episode into another to-do list. Pick one that connects with where you are getting stuck.

• Review your week: Find one place where your discretionary time could better reflect something you care about.

• Use what you already know: Put one idea from a book, podcast or course into practice before collecting more advice on the same problem.

• Shrink the first step: Decide on a small action and a realistic time to do it.

• Name the uncertainty: Write down what you are afraid of getting wrong and what preparation would actually help.

• Choose a useful comparison: Ask what you can learn from someone’s experience, rather than why you are not already where they are.

The next step does not need to be impressive

What stayed with me was the difference between understanding an idea and giving it somewhere to show up in your life. Corbin had spent years learning about people, yet he could still recognise the ways he had held himself back.

I do not think the answer is to dismiss preparation or pretend that taking action is always easy. It is to get more honest and specific about what is stopping you.

You might need a different goal. You might need more support, a skill you have not developed or a plan that fits the life you actually have. Or you might be ready for a small attempt that you keep postponing.

Rather than asking how to take action on everything at once, start with one thing you can reasonably do. Then give yourself the chance to learn from doing it.

Watch or listen to the conversation

For the full discussion, find Why You Know What to Do but Don’t Do It | Corbin Bruckshaw on The True Form Podcast. Watch on YouTube or listen on Spotify and Apple Podcasts.

Watch me on YouTube

https://youtu.be/tB9qaNgvPGE 

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Support the show

If you’re enjoying the podcast and getting something out of these conversations, you can support The True Form Podcast with a monthly contribution. It helps me bring on great guests, reach more people and keep these conversations going.

No pressure, but it genuinely makes a difference. Thanks for being part of it.

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You Don’t Need More Motivation. You Need a System

David Fullmer’s seven-day approach to daily habits, personal accountability and putting growth into practice

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TL;DR

• Give each day a focus: Dave’s B7 framework turns broad personal-growth ideas into a weekly rhythm you can remember.

• Notice before you change: Watch your self-talk and behaviour, then give yourself a practical next step rather than another motivational speech.

• Make room for more than work: Quiet, gratitude, forgiveness and time with people you love all have a place in Dave’s week.

• Treat growth as practice: The useful question is not just who you want to become, but whether today’s choices move you in that direction.

  🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts. 

When does knowing better become doing better?

You can finish a book feeling ready to change your life, then reach the end of the week without doing anything differently. The ideas made sense. Putting them into practice was the part that never quite happened.

That gap was what I wanted to explore with Dave Fullmer on The True Form Podcast. I’m interested in good information, but I’m more interested in what someone can actually do with it once the conversation ends.

Dave is an entrepreneur, speaker and author of Becoming Seven: The Superhuman Rhythm. In our conversation, he described growing up around personal-development seminars, then spending years reading and learning while wondering when he was going to apply it all.

His response was to give each day of the week a focus. Instead of holding a long list of ideas in your head, you have a daily reminder of something to practise.

What I liked was the simplicity. These daily habits are not another invitation to overhaul your whole life by Monday morning. They offer a way to bring your attention back to something useful, then do something with it.

Here are seven lessons from the conversation, along with ways you could try them in your own week.

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Give motivation a job

Dave starts his framework with Motivation Monday. It is a chance to revisit your goals, write down what matters and remember why you are putting effort into the week ahead.

But he is blunt about the difference between getting excited and getting somewhere. As he puts it: “You’re just a motivated idiot.”

The line is funny, but it points to a question worth asking: what is all this motivation leading to? Another seminar, another saved video, or a decision you are actually going to follow through on?

My practical take is to finish your Monday reflection with one commitment. If your goal is to get stronger, choose your training sessions. If it is to be more present at home, choose a time when your phone goes away.

Keep the commitment small enough that you can say what doing it would look like. “Be healthier” leaves plenty of room to negotiate with yourself. “Train on Tuesday and Thursday before work” gives you something concrete to return to.

At the end of the week, review the action rather than how inspired you felt. Did you follow through? If not, what needs adjusting?

That gives motivation a useful role. It helps you choose a direction, while the commitment gives you something to practise after the initial excitement passes.

Track your choices without turning on yourself

Tracking Tuesday is Dave’s day for watching how he shows up. That includes his thoughts, attitude, conversations and the decisions he might otherwise explain away.

One of his examples was catching himself wanting to top someone else’s story. He realised that having something to contribute did not mean he needed to take over the moment. Sometimes the better choice was to listen.

That makes accountability much more practical than simply telling yourself to try harder. It becomes noticing a specific behaviour while there is still an opportunity to respond differently.

Dave also described writing down a negative thought and coming up with five possible solutions. He was clear that this was not about pretending everything would be fine.

You could try a shorter version tonight:

• Notice: What situation brought out a reaction I was not happy with?

• Own: Which part of my response was within my control?

• Choose: What could I do differently next time?

Taking ownership does not mean you caused every difficult thing that happened to you. The useful distinction is between what happened and what you can influence now.

The progress to look for is not a week without negative thoughts. It is catching one familiar reaction and giving yourself another option.

Leave some space without filling it

Whisper Wednesday is Dave’s invitation to turn down the input. He described quiet walks, time in nature and driving without music so he could listen to his own thoughts.

This was something I connected with in the conversation. I spoke about how easily every spare moment gets filled with music, podcasts, social media or television. There is not always much space left to be with yourself.

You do not need to copy Dave’s long walks to experiment with the idea. My suggestion is to take ten minutes of an ordinary activity and leave the headphones off.

Walk around the block, sit outside or do a simple household task without adding another voice. If a thought keeps returning, write it down afterwards rather than trying to solve everything on the spot.

Dave connects this practice with intuition. You can explore that perspective without assuming every feeling is an instruction you should follow.

Start by noticing what comes up when you are not being entertained or directed. Is there a decision you have been avoiding? Are you tired? Is something taking up more attention than you realised?

There does not have to be a breakthrough. You might simply finish the ten minutes with a clearer sense of what is on your mind.

Make gratitude specific enough to say out loud

Thankful Thursday is not just a private list for Dave. He talks about calling people, sending messages and noticing the effort behind things he might otherwise take for granted.

Later in our conversation, he told a story about recognising the man keeping an airport bathroom clean. What stood out to me was that he noticed someone whose work could easily have stayed invisible.

That is an approachable place to start with gratitude. You do not have to feel grateful for everything in your life to acknowledge one person’s contribution.

My suggestion is to send one specific thank-you this Thursday. Instead of “Thanks for everything,” name what the person did and why it mattered to you.

It could be a friend who checked in, a colleague who made your day easier or someone at home who handled something you barely noticed at the time. Give them enough detail to know you actually saw it.

Dave also talks about feeling grateful for difficult experiences. That is his perspective, not a requirement to be thankful for being hurt.

Begin with something genuine. The action is complete when you have expressed it, regardless of whether you get a reply or feel instantly different afterwards.

Letting go does not mean letting everyone back in

Forgiveness Friday brought us to the past, current relationships, forgiving yourself and offering a genuine apology when you have done something wrong.

One distinction Dave made was that you can let go of resentment without bringing someone back into your close circle. Forgiveness and access are not the same decision.

We also discussed his windscreen and rearview-mirror analogy. You can look back to learn where you have been without trying to steer your entire life by what is behind you.

I would turn that into two questions: what do I need to remember from this experience, and what do I no longer need to keep replaying?

Write the answers privately before deciding whether any conversation is needed. Your next step might be an apology, a clearer boundary or simply recognising that an old mistake does not have to become your permanent identity.

There is no need to force contact with someone who harmed you, or to give yourself a deadline for feeling differently. Some experiences need time and support, not a weekly tick box.

The useful aim is to identify what moving forward could look like while keeping the lesson and any necessary boundary intact.

Put connection on the calendar, not just the wish list

Satisfaction Saturday is about enjoying life with the people you love. Dave explains it through the idea of “love you money”: wanting resources so he can create experiences, help others and spend meaningful time with his family.

That was the part of his money philosophy I wanted to explore. What are you working towards, and does your life currently contain any of it?

Dave talks about travelling to surf with his children. Your version does not need to involve a flight or a big budget. It might be breakfast with a mate, a walk with your partner or an afternoon with family where you are not half-working.

Choose the experience first, then make it fit the time and money you actually have. Put it in the calendar with the same intention you would give another commitment.

We also talked about the people around you. Dave values having peers and more experienced people he can learn from, rather than always being the person with the answers.

Consider who you would genuinely like to spend time with this week. The point is not to turn every friendship into a self-improvement project, but to make room for connection instead of continually postponing it.

Measure this one by whether you made the time, not by what you spent.

Practise humility, then start again

Supplication Sunday is explicitly connected to Dave’s Christian faith. He describes acknowledging God and accepting that he cannot do everything alone.

He explains it through jiu-jitsu. After years on the mat, one of his biggest lessons has been knowing when to tap rather than letting pride keep him in a position that could hurt him.

You do not have to share his faith to reflect on the question underneath that example: where are you refusing to acknowledge that you need help?

For someone who is religious, Sunday might include prayer and reflection. If that is not your practice, my suggested adaptation is a quiet weekly review and an honest conversation with someone you trust.

Ask where you are forcing something, what you do not know yet and who might help you see it differently. Then choose one adjustment for the coming week.

That is different from giving up responsibility. You are still deciding what to do, but without assuming you must have every answer yourself.

Near the end of our conversation, I asked Dave what “becoming” meant to him. His answer brought us back to everyday choices: the words you use, the work you do and the way you respond.

The framework is something to repeat, not a test you pass once.

Quick wins for the week ahead

• Book one action: Turn a broad goal into a specific commitment with a day and time.

• Catch one reaction: Write down what happened, what you controlled and what you could try next time.

• Leave ten minutes quiet: Take a walk or do a routine task without headphones.

• Send one proper thank-you: Name the action you appreciated and why it mattered.

• Arrange something simple: Make time with someone you love without waiting for a bigger budget or a quieter month.

Your next choice is a place to start

What I took from Dave was not that everyone needs to organise their week exactly like he does. It was that personal growth needs somewhere to happen beyond the book, the conversation or the moment you feel inspired.

Monday gives him a reminder to reconnect with purpose. Tuesday brings his attention to his behaviour. The rest of the week makes room for things that could otherwise get pushed aside.

You might try the full rhythm. You might begin with one part of it and see what you notice.

Either way, you do not have to wait until you have a perfect routine or a completely different life. Choose one daily habit you can practise with the time and energy you have now.

Then ask yourself the question Dave’s closing reflection left me with: does this choice fit the person I want to become?

Hear the full conversation

Episode 309, “You Don’t Need More Motivation. You Need a System | David Fullmer,” explores these ideas through Dave’s stories, his seven-day framework and our conversation about ownership, relationships and purpose.

🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts.  

Watch me on YouTube

https://youtu.be/dewnGtTk53s

Listen to the True From Podcast
Apple Podcasts - https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/the-true-form-podcast/id1593804496

Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/show/6RVH2O6MbLOCohBKPhXO0L?si=ZI8D3MnhSfSjnohSXYN_MQ

Everywhere els - https://trueform.buzzsprout.com

Sponsor: If you’re interested in trying red and near-infrared light therapy for recovery, pain, and overall health, check out Lumaflex. Use code TRUEFORM for 10% off: https://lumaflex.com.au/TRUEFORM

Stop Chasing, Start Embodying: A Breathwork Coach on Building an Identity That Lasts

Aiden Domic on why "faking it till you make it" is broken, and what to do instead.

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TL;DR

• Most people are chasing an outcome when they should be becoming a person; that's the difference between doing and embodying.

  • You're not faking it till you make it. You're making yourself the person who can do the thing.

  • Six breaths a minute, in through the nose, out through pursed lips, is the simplest nervous system tool you own.

  • Processing emotions is a skill. Skip it, and you hurt people. Get stuck in it, and you never move.

  • If you don't back yourself, no one else will, even the people who love you.

  🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts. 

Introduction

Aiden Domic asked one question in this episode that reframes almost everything: are you a signal, or are you an amplifier?

The signal is the one out front doing the work. The amplifier is the one who takes what's already there and lifts it higher. Aiden spent most of his life assuming he was meant to be the signal. Turns out he's the amplifier, and the second he accepted that, everything he'd been forcing suddenly made sense.

Aiden is a Melbourne-based performance coach, breathwork instructor and mindfulness practitioner. He teaches breathwork at Pando Society in Elwood, runs corporate wellbeing programs through Connected Minds, and is building 1 Million Minds, a mission to fill stadiums around the world for mental health. Along the way, he's coached athletes, executives and one client back from a wind-turbine fall to running an ultra-marathon on crutches.

This episode is a practical guide to a bigger question: how do you stop chasing a version of yourself you're supposed to be, and start becoming the one you actually are? If you've ever felt like you're pushing hard without moving, this is for you.

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Stop chasing, start embodying: the real difference between doing and being

What it is: Embodiment is the difference between thinking about being someone and actually being them. It's not a mindset trick. It's a decision to stop performing the version of you that you think will get the outcome, and start becoming the person who naturally produces it.

Why it matters: Most people burn out because the drive is coming from outside them: the result, the recognition, the version of themselves everyone else can see. When the outcome doesn't land, the whole scaffolding collapses. Embodiment moves the fuel source inside, which is why it lasts.

How to apply it:

1. Notice when you're "trying to be" someone. That trying is the giveaway.

2. Ask what that version of you would actually do differently, not think, do.

3. Do one of those things today, before you feel ready.

Common mistake: Treating embodiment as a mindset exercise. It's not. It's a series of small decisions that add up to a different self-image.

Try this today: Name one behaviour the future version of you does daily. Do it once today, without waiting to feel like that person first.

Are you a signal or an amplifier? Why knowing which one changes everything

What it is: Aiden's frame for personality and contribution. The signal creates the primary work or product. The amplifier lifts other people's work and multiplies it. Neither is better, but forcing yourself to be the wrong one drains you.

Why it matters: As Aiden put it: "I've always thought I'd need to be a signal, but I'm actually an amplifier. And that makes sense with who I am, because my whole life I've been trying to just be that signal, when really, I've always been bringing people up."

If you're an amplifier trying to be a signal, no amount of hard work will feel right. Once you accept your role, your energy stops leaking.

How to apply it:

1. Look at where you naturally add the most value, is it creating, or lifting?

2. Notice which work leaves you energised versus depleted.

3. Design your week around your actual role, not the one you think you should have.

Common mistake: Assuming being an amplifier is a lesser role. Aiden's building a global mental health movement as an amplifier.

Try this today: Ask yourself honestly, signal or amplifier? Sit with the answer for five minutes before you dismiss it.

You're not faking it till you make it, you're becoming that person

What it is: The most quoted piece of advice in personal development is, according to Aiden, wrong. You're not pretending to be something you're not. You're rehearsing yourself into someone who genuinely is that thing.

Why it matters: "Fake it till you make it" implies dishonesty. That framing makes people feel like frauds and eventually pull back. Aiden's reframe "you're making yourself that person to be able to put yourself in the position to do it", turns the same action into practice rather than performance.

How to apply it:

1. Stop calling it faking. Call it rehearsing.

2. Pick one situation where you feel like an imposter, and identify what the "real" version of you would do there.

3. Do that thing. Log it. Repeat.

Common mistake: Waiting to feel confident before you act. Confidence is a byproduct of the reps, not a prerequisite.

Try this today: Write down one identity statement "I am someone who…" And take one action that proves it, before the end of the day.

Six breaths a minute: the simplest nervous system tool you own

What it is: A baseline breath practice. In through the nose, out through pursed lips for a count of six. Aiden's target: around six breaths per minute at a healthy resting state. Most people breathe more than double that, and through the mouth.

Why it matters: "The calmest state that you can possibly get to where you're regulating your nervous system is by breathing slower," Aiden explains. Slow the exhale and you shift out of fight-or-flight. Do it consistently and it becomes your default state, not just something you do in a session.

How to apply it:

1. Breathe in through the nose.

2. Breathe out through pursed lips for a count of six. The longer the exhale, the calmer you'll feel.

3. Aim for around six breaths per minute.

4. Practise ten minutes a day. Then let it show up in your life without thinking about it.

Pro tip: Aiden compares breath practice to lifting weights. You don't feel stronger every session, but when you go to carry the groceries or pick something heavy up, the strength is there. Same with breath.

Try this today: Set a timer for two minutes. Nose in, pursed lips out for six. Notice how you feel at the end.

Process your emotions, don't skip them and don't get stuck in them

What it is: Between feeling something and reacting to it, there's a processing stage. Most people fail at one of two ends. Some skip it and jump straight into action. Others get stuck in the processing and never act.

Why it matters: As Aiden puts it: "If you skip it, like you don't know what you can do… you're probably going to hurt yourself, and you're probably going to hurt other people." Both extremes look different but produce the same problem: you're not actually working with what you feel, you're bypassing it or drowning in it.

How to apply it:

1. When something lands hard, pause before you act, even 30 seconds counts.

2. Name what you're feeling and why. That's self-awareness in real time.

3. Then take action from the logical mind, not the reactive one.

Common mistake: Confusing "processing" with rumination. Processing has an exit. Rumination doesn't.

Try this today: Next time you feel a spike, don't reply, don't act. Breathe six-count for one minute, then decide.

Back yourself before anyone else can

What it is: The willingness to keep going on your vision when nobody around you has caught up to it yet. Aiden's answer to "what would you tell someone starting out?" was blunt: back yourself, because if you don't, no one will.

Why it matters: "They might say they are, but they're not, and they may believe in you. But when something goes wrong, they don't want to see you go through pain. You need to believe in you more than anything." Even the people who love you will flinch before you do, not because they don't believe in you, but because they don't want to watch you hurt. That's why the belief has to come from inside.

How to apply it:

1. Get clear enough on your vision that opinions can't shake it.

2. Take opinions on board, but don't outsource your decisions to them.

3. Keep going through the season where nothing looks like it's working. That's the season that matters.

Common mistake: Mistaking love from others for belief in you. Love wants you safe. Belief wants you to keep going.

Try this today: Write one line about where you're going. Read it before you check your phone tomorrow morning.

Show up with love, even when you're tough

What it is: Aiden's answer to the question Jack asks every guest; the one daily thing everyone should do wasn't a habit or a protocol. It was: love more. Show up in life with an open heart.

Why it matters: "We can be as tough as we want… but at the same time, can you love? Because if you can't, you've got no substance. You're actually just a walking thing of meat at the end of the day." Toughness without love is hollow. It might get you through the day, but it won't build anything that lasts.

How to apply it:

1. Look at one ordinary thing today; a tree, a door, a person, and put real feeling behind seeing it with love.

2. Notice what happens in your body. Aiden reckons you'll start smiling.

3. Bring that same posture into conversations you'd usually approach guarded.

Try this today: Say "I love that" out loud or internally, with feeling, about three things you encounter before lunch.

A story worth staying for: from wind-turbine fall to running an ultra

One of the moments in this episode that grounds every other lesson is Aiden's story about Mick Marshall — the dad of a childhood friend who fell off a wind turbine and was told he'd never walk again.

Mick decided otherwise. He hired a pain specialist, a nutritionist and Aiden as his breathwork and NLP coach. Between them, they built a protocol. Mick walked again. Then he ran the Melbourne Marathon on crutches, breaking a world record. Then they did a 60km ultra together at Mount Buffalo. Then Mick went to Switzerland to do more.

"You've had all these people like your mother, good example, like doing what people said you can't do, just went and did it," Jack reflected. That's what embodiment looks like in practice. Not a mindset trick. A decision, repeated until it becomes who you are.

Quick wins checklist (do these in the next 24 hours)

• Practise six breaths a minute for two minutes: nose in, pursed lips out for six.

• Ask yourself honestly, signal or amplifier?

• Write one identity statement: "I am someone who…" and take one action that proves it.

• Next time you feel a spike, pause and breathe before you react.

• Look at one ordinary thing today and see it with love. See what happens.

Closing insight

The through-line of this conversation is quieter than the individual lessons: stop trying to be someone, and start being someone. That's the whole shift. Embodiment isn't a mindset trick you do once; it's a series of small decisions that compound into a different self-image over time. The breath work makes it possible. The self-awareness makes it honest. Backing yourself makes it durable. And loving more makes it worth doing at all. The version of you that lasts isn't the one chasing hardest. It's the one that already knows who they are, and shows up as that person before the world catches up.

🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts.  

Watch me on YouTube

https://youtu.be/5fo5MUzohgM

Listen to the True From Podcast
Apple Podcasts - https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/the-true-form-podcast/id1593804496

Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/show/6RVH2O6MbLOCohBKPhXO0L?si=ZI8D3MnhSfSjnohSXYN_MQ

Everywhere els - https://trueform.buzzsprout.com

Sponsor: If you’re interested in trying red and near-infrared light therapy for recovery, pain, and overall health, check out Lumaflex. Use code TRUEFORM for 10% off: https://lumaflex.com.au/TRUEFORM

What Every Woman Over 35 Needs to Know About Her Body

Why training harder stops working after 35 and the shift that actually changes things.

Watch On YouTube

〰️

Watch On YouTube 〰️

TL;DR

• Estrogen starts declining around age 30, and women lose 3-8% of muscle mass per decade if they don't train for it.

  • Two to three heavy strength sessions per week, adequate protein, and enough carbs and fats do more than daily cardio.

  • Around 95% of your decisions are made subconsciously, meaning belief work matters as much as macros.

  • Naming a thought (giving it an "alias") creates distance between you and the story running in your head.

  • Two minutes outside, phone-free, is the simplest daily habit Emily would give every person on the planet.

  🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts. 

Introduction

At 35, Emily Spurling's toolbox stopped working.

For 15 years, yoga, meditation, hiking, surfing and eating what she wanted had kept her fit and well. Then, seemingly overnight, none of it did. She tried the Tracy Anderson method six days a week for over seven hours. She cycled through keto, carnivore, paleo and fasting. She still put on weight and lost muscle. "Bugger this," she remembers thinking. "Something's missing."

What was missing was female-specific physiology. Emily is a women's health coach, wellness retreat leader and the founder of Karma Being, where she runs The Strong, Calm & Lean Method. She has spent 16 years running retreats around the world and now coaches women through what she calls the real puzzle: how a woman's body, hormones and mindset shift together after 30.

On this episode of The True Form Podcast, she walked host Jack Graham through the science and the mindset work most fitness advice skips. If you're a woman over 35 who feels like the old rules have stopped applying, this article is the shortest path from her episode to what you can actually do about it.

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Listen On Apple Podcast 〰️

Listen On Spotify

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Listen On Spotify 〰️

Why women's bodies change after 35 (and what to do about it)

What it is: As estrogen declines from around age 30, women lose muscle, become more stress-sensitive, and store more fat around the midsection, even when nothing about their diet or training has changed.

Why it matters: Emily is direct about the numbers: "We lose about three to eight per cent of muscle mass per decade from then on if we don't actively try and maintain that." Standard advice- eat less, run more- makes the underlying problem worse by adding stress to an already reactive system.

How to apply it:

1. Reframe midlife body changes as physiology, not willpower.

2. Stop treating cardio and calorie restriction as the default fix.

3. Learn what estrogen and cortisol actually do to your body so you can respond, not blame yourself.

Pro tip: The scales are one data point, not the whole picture. Emily also tracks how her clothes feel, her energy, sleep, digestion and skin.

Try this today: Write down one health "rule" you've been following that no longer seems to work. Just name it.

Lift heavy weights two to three times a week

What it is: Emily's non-negotiable for women 30+: two to three strength sessions per week, heavy enough to challenge you, around 30 minutes each.

Why it matters: Lifting is the single most effective way to protect muscle, bone and metabolism as estrogen drops. Emily is clear that the volume most women think they need is way more than the science requires. "We don't need to commit that much time," she says. Beginners can start in the 8–15 rep range to condition ligaments and joints, then progress to 4–6 reps at heavier loads.

How to apply it:

1. Schedule two to three 30-minute strength sessions per week.

2. Start in the 8-15 rep range if you're new, focusing on technique.

3. Once you're strong and stable, move to heavier weight in the 4-6 rep range.

4. Progressively overload: add small amounts of weight or reps over time.

Common mistake: Doing daily light-weight, high-rep classes and calling it strength training. Emily spent years on this approach and lost muscle anyway.

Try this today: Book your next two gym sessions in your calendar as non-negotiables. Half an hour each.

Eat enough protein, more than you probably think

What it is: Adequate protein is what tells your body to build the muscle that your training is trying to stimulate. Without it, you get the workout stress but not the payoff.

Why it matters: "Women actually need more than men per kilo of body weight," Emily says. Her guidance from the episode:

• Perimenopausal years (around 40s): roughly 2.2 g of protein per kg of ideal body weight.

• Menopausal years (50s): closer to 2.4 g per kg of ideal body weight.

Emily is equally firm on carbs and fats. Cutting carbs leaves you too flat to train hard. Cutting fats leaves your hormones out of balance and, in her words, "we can get a bit testy and a bit emotional without enough fats as women."

How to apply it:

1. Anchor every meal around a protein source.

2. Eat protein around your workouts to support muscle repair.

3. Keep carbs and healthy fats in the picture; don't fear-monger any food group.

4. Prioritise whole foods over "hits the macros but junk" swaps.

Pro tip: Emily doesn't track macros anymore, but she only earned that intuition after healing her gut and learning the science first. Track long enough to learn what "enough" looks like on your plate.

Try this today: Weigh or estimate the protein in your next meal. Most people underestimate by a lot.

Regulate your nervous system, not just your workouts

What it is: After 30, women become less stress-resilient as estrogen declines. Chronic stress keeps cortisol elevated, which promotes fat storage around the abdomen and disrupts sleep, mood and recovery.

Why it matters: "The problem starts when our stress stays elevated," Emily says. "People have lost the ability to turn off the stress response." Adding hard training on top of an already-saturated system doesn't help; it compounds the problem.

How to apply it:

1. Practise a long-exhale breath: inhale for four, exhale for eight, six times.

2. Use the physiological sigh, a double inhale through the nose, long sigh out the mouth, anywhere, anytime.

3. Do a bedtime body scan, consciously softening each area as you breathe.

4. Layer stress relief across timeframes: something daily, something weekly, something every three to six months.

Common mistake: Swapping one stress (work) for another (over-training) and calling it self-care.

Try this today: Do six long-exhale breaths right now. That's the science-backed minimum to activate your parasympathetic nervous system.

Change your beliefs, not just your behaviour

What it is: Emily draws on the work of Bruce Lipton and PSYCH-K to argue that around 95% of our decisions are driven by the subconscious. Willpower is the small remaining 5%.

Why it matters: If your subconscious believes "it's not safe to be attractive," or "food is a reward," no meal plan will hold. Emily shared a client who couldn't buy the clothes she wanted or step into a gym until they addressed a subconscious belief tied to an earlier trauma. "It's just as though people explain the experience through trauma as though it's been sucked out like a vacuum," she says. "The event happened, but the emotion has been sucked out."

How to apply it:

1. Ask yourself when you last felt your best, and when the problem began.

2. Write down the beliefs you're running about food, exercise, or your body.

3. For each unhelpful belief, decide what you'd rather believe instead, in your own words.

4. Rehearse the new belief in the present tense, not the future.

Pro tip: Emily says beliefs about being "enough" and beliefs about food as reward are two of the most common patterns she sees in clients.

Try this today: Journal one sentence: "The belief that's been getting in my way is." Awareness is the first move.

Give your inner critic an alias

What it is: A practical mindfulness tool. Instead of merging with your negative thoughts, assign them a voice, a character or persona, so you can hear them as separate from you.

Why it matters: Emily's husband uses The Rock. She's heard clients use Blake Lively. On the episode, Jack tried it live, casting Alex Hormozi as the voice telling him he wasn't good enough to be a podcaster. "All of a sudden it becomes separate to you," Emily says. "You can just have that little internal dialogue with yourself, and then you let it go."

How to apply it:

1. Pick a persona whose voice fits your inner critic's tone: funny, blunt, harsh, whatever fits.

2. When a self-critical thought lands, hear it in that voice.

3. Answer it back out loud or in your head. Thank it, disagree with it, move on.

4. Use the same tool with your kids, your team, or anyone stuck in a spiral of thought.

Common mistake: Trying to suppress or argue with the thought head-on. That usually amplifies it. Distance works better than fight.

Try this today: Name your alias. That's it. You'll be surprised how quickly it kicks in the next time.

Label the emotion to bring your brain back online

What it is: When you're triggered: angry, anxious, ashamed- your prefrontal cortex (the rational, decision-making part of your brain) goes offline, and your primal fight-flight-freeze brain takes over. Labelling what you're feeling brings the prefrontal cortex back.

Why it matters: This is why people do things they regret in strong emotion. Emily's approach: notice the physical signal first, tension, heat, jaw clenching, rapid breathing, then name the emotion out loud or in your head. "I notice anger." That single act creates a gap between trigger and reaction.

How to apply it:

1. Learn your body's early-warning signs for your most common emotion.

2. When you feel them, silently say: "I notice [emotion]."

3. Take a long-exhale breath before you respond.

4. If it's anger, buy yourself time: "Give me a moment and I'll come back to you."

Try this today: Next time you feel yourself tighten up, pause and label it in one word. Just once.

A quick story worth stealing

Emily shared a story from a conference where Bruce Lipton, the epigenetics researcher behind The Biology of Belief, had just finished explaining that 95% of our decisions are made subconsciously. Someone in the audience asked how, then, we're supposed to change any of it. Lipton didn't have an answer.

The next speaker, the founder of PSYCH-K, did. He invited a woman in the audience who was terrified of public speaking onto the stage, walked her through a subconscious belief-change process, and two minutes later she was telling her story to the room. A year later she came back to the same conference; she'd since joined Toastmasters and earned promotions at work.

Emily's point isn't that any single method is magic. It's that the subconscious is workable, not fixed.

Quick wins checklist (next 24 hours)

• Book two 30-minute strength sessions into your week.

• Estimate the protein in your next meal; aim higher than you think you need.

• Do six long-exhale breaths (inhale 4, exhale 8).

• Write down one belief about food, exercise or your body that isn't serving you.

• Choose your inner critic's alias.

• Spend two minutes outside, no phone, no music, no podcast.

Closing insight

The most useful thing Emily said all episode was also the smallest. When Jack asked her for the one practical thing every person on the planet could do daily, she didn't reach for macros or meditation apps. Two minutes outside. No music. No phone. Just be aware.

That answer is the whole method in miniature. The women who transform under her care aren't the ones who train hardest; they're the ones who stop punishing themselves long enough to notice what's actually going on. The body isn't broken after 35. It's asking for a different set of inputs: heavier weight, more protein, less stress, kinder thoughts. Give it those, consistently, and it responds.

Start with the two minutes.

🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts.  

Watch me on YouTube

https://youtu.be/TZVWBA0G3dQ

Listen to the True From Podcast
Apple Podcasts - https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/the-true-form-podcast/id1593804496

Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/show/6RVH2O6MbLOCohBKPhXO0L?si=ZI8D3MnhSfSjnohSXYN_MQ

Everywhere els - https://trueform.buzzsprout.com

Sponsor: If you’re interested in trying red and near-infrared light therapy for recovery, pain, and overall health, check out Lumaflex. Use code TRUEFORM for 10% off: https://lumaflex.com.au/TRUEFORM

How to Heal Chronic Lyme: What Actually Worked After 8 Years Bed Bound

What Allie Chandler learnt from a decade of illness and how to apply it, even if you're not sick.

Watch On YouTube

〰️

Watch On YouTube 〰️

TL;DR

• Allie Chandler spent close to eight years largely bedbound with chronic Lyme, mould toxicity, and hyperadrenergic POTS before the pieces finally clicked.

• The turning point wasn't a supplement; it was rewiring her nervous system through brain retraining (DNRS), reframing her identity, and finding community.

• She now runs a marketing agency in the same industry that helped her heal, and lifts weights six days a week.

• Six lessons pulled straight from the conversation, each with something you can try today.

  🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts. 

Introduction

At her worst, Allie Chandler's resting heart rate was 55. The moment she stood up, it shot to 180 and stayed there until she sat back down. Stairs were out. Walking to the mailbox was out. Being newly married and going on dates, out. She was in her twenties. She'd been a healthy kid, a competitive volleyball player, and a high school teacher with a Master's in Writing. Then she got bitten by a tick in Europe and lost the next eight years of her life to a mystery no doctor could name.

This is where most chronic illness stories either become miracle narratives or victim narratives. Allie's is neither. It's a slow, honest account of what actually moved the needle, and most of it happened inside her own head.

Today she's the founder of Upsell Health, a marketing agency working with functional medicine practitioners and wellness brands. She lifts for two hours in the morning. She runs a 20,000-person social club on the side. She sat down with Jack on The True Form Podcast for an hour, and what came out was less a recovery story and more a manual for how to think differently about your body, your work, and who you're becoming.

Here's what to take from it.

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Listen On Apple Podcast 〰️

Listen On Spotify

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Listen On Spotify 〰️

Lesson 1: Stop tracking symptoms. Start tracking wins.

What it is: A deliberate shift in what your brain is scanning for, from threats to progress.

Why it matters: When Allie was at her sickest, she was cataloguing every symptom in real time. Every headache, every food, every environmental trigger. "I think that trained my brain to constantly be scanning for threat," she said. Your reticular activating system, the filter for what you notice consciously, gets trained by what you feed it. Feed it symptoms, and it finds more. Feed it wins, and it finds those too.

How to apply it:

1. Delete or archive your symptom tracker for one week.

2. At the end of each day, write down three things that went well, however small.

3. When your brain jumps to "what's wrong," ask instead: "what's working right now?"

Pro tip: This is uncomfortable at first because it feels like you're ignoring a problem. You're not. You're changing the filter.

Try this today: Write down three wins from yesterday before you check your phone.

Lesson 2: Rewire your nervous system with brain retraining

What it is: A daily practice of interrupting your brain's threat response and replacing it with a new, calmer pathway.

Why it matters: Allie credits the Dynamic Neural Retraining System (DNRS) as the single biggest lever in her recovery. It's an hour of daily practice built on two parts: deliberately entering situations that trigger you, and using a spoken script that acknowledges the fear and reroutes it. "Hey, I appreciate you making me feel anxious to point out that there's a threat, but we're actually okay," she'd tell her body. Sounds basic. But repetition is the point.

How to apply it:

1. Notice one recurring anxious pattern: a body sensation, a thought loop, a reactive moment.

2. When it fires, pause and thank the response out loud: "Thanks for watching out for me."

3. State what the new pathway is: "We're safe. This is what calm looks like."

4. Repeat daily. Six months is a reasonable expectation, not six days.

Common mistake: Doing it once when you're already panicking and concluding it doesn't work.

Try this today: Pick one moment tomorrow morning to run the script, even in a completely calm state, so the pathway is there when you need it.

Lesson 3: Visualise the version of yourself you can't yet imagine

What it is: Structured mental rehearsal of the life you want, in enough sensory detail that your brain treats it as memory.

Why it matters: Allie couldn't picture being well. She'd been sick so long that her ceiling was "well enough to make eggs." So she forced herself to visualise further: the house, the sounds, the smells, the emotions of a healthy body. "I would spend thirty, forty minutes doing these visualisations," she said. "Picture myself lifting again. That was really important to me." Athletes do it. Olympians do it. It works because your brain doesn't strongly distinguish rehearsed experience from lived experience.

How to apply it:

1. Choose one specific future scene, not a goal, a scene. A morning, a conversation, a lift.

2. Add sensory layers: what you see, hear, feel, smell.

3. Sit with it for 5-10 minutes daily until it feels familiar.

4. Notice what it stirs in your body. That's the point.

Try this today: Close your eyes for two minutes and picture one moment from a life you'd love to be living.

Lesson 4: Stop claiming your diagnosis as your identity

What it is: Separating what's happening in your body from who you are.

Why it matters: This was the sharpest moment in the whole episode. Allie stopped saying "I have Lyme." She started saying "I'm dealing with these symptoms right now." Same facts, completely different energy. "Energetically that feels wrong. I don't want it as part of my identity." The same trap catches people in fitness ("I'm just unfit"), work ("I'm bad at this"), and relationships. Once the label becomes the identity, the identity defends the label.

How to apply it:

1. Notice how you introduce your struggles. "I am" vs "I'm dealing with."

2. Rewrite the sentence. Same problem, different grammar.

3. Watch how it changes what you're willing to try.

Pro tip: Your language to yourself matters more than your language to others. The inner sentence is the one your brain acts on.

Try this today: Catch one "I am [problem]" statement and rewrite it as "I'm working through [problem]."

Lesson 5: Community isn't optional, pick it deliberately

What it is: Choosing to be around people who match the version of yourself you're trying to become.

Why it matters: Allie was clear that community was one of the pillars of her healing, but she was equally clear it can go either way. Some support groups helped her; others were people "wallowing in it" and treating the diagnosis as identity. She sought out the ones with a "this isn't going to be my life" mindset. Same principle applies to the gym: her flatmate is a strongman competitor who squats 600-plus pounds, "delusionally better than me," and it pulls her up.

How to apply it:

1. List the five people you spend the most time with.

2. Ask: are they scanning for threat, or scanning for wins?

3. Add one person or space that models where you're going; a coach, a group, a training partner, a community.

4. Reduce time with the loudest complaint voice, even if it's close to you.

Try this today: Message one person you admire who's further down the road than you.

Lesson 6: Lead with value, not urgency, in marketing and in life

What it is: Empathy-led marketing, Allie's phrase for building trust through education rather than fear.

Why it matters: Allie now works with functional medicine practitioners and supplement brands, and she's turned down significant revenue when clients wanted to run hard-urgency, fear-based campaigns. Her audience is chronically ill people with dysregulated nervous systems — the last population you want to hit with "buy this now or stay sick forever." Instead: seven or eight nurturing pieces of content for every one sale. It's a marketing lesson, but it's also a life lesson. The people who lead with value in their relationships, their work, and their content tend to end up with better everything.

How to apply it:

1. Audit your last ten posts, emails, or conversations. What ratio of value to ask?

2. If it's less than 7:1 in favour of value, adjust.

3. When you do ask: for a sale, a favour, a decision, make it clean, brief, and specific.

Common mistake: Assuming "value" means free stuff. It means content or effort that actually helps someone, whether or not they ever buy anything.

Try this today: Send one "no ask" message to someone in your audience or network, a link, a resource, a genuine compliment.

The moment that captures it

Allie's clearest example came near the end. She wanted to lift again but couldn't stand without her heart rate spiking to 180. So she started smaller than small.

"Put on your gym clothes, lace up your tennis shoes, and… ooh, that's a lot for me today. Okay. Now tomorrow, what can I do? Can I take one step out the door? Okay, great."

For weeks she walked to her apartment gym and lay down at the door because her heart rate was too high to stand. Eventually she managed twenty seconds on an elliptical. Five years later she was lifting for two hours in the morning. That's the whole method in one story: identify the smallest possible next step, do it, then do the next one. No motivation required.

Quick wins checklist (do these in the next 24 hours)

• Write down three wins from yesterday before checking your phone.

• Rewrite one "I am [problem]" sentence as "I'm working through [problem]."

• Visualise one specific future scene for two minutes with your eyes closed.

• Message one person who's further down the road than you.

• Send one "no ask" message to someone in your network.

• Choose one uncomfortable trigger to face tomorrow, however small.

Closing insight

The thread running through Allie's story isn't a supplement, a doctor, or a diagnosis. It's the choice, repeated daily, for years, to change what her brain was scanning for. She stopped scanning for what was wrong and started scanning for what was working. She stopped rehearsing the version of herself that was sick and started rehearsing the version that was strong. She stopped claiming the diagnosis and started claiming the direction.

You don't need chronic illness for any of this to matter. The same filters run in the background of a career you feel stuck in, a body you're frustrated with, or a relationship you can't quite name what's off about. What you scan for, you find. What you rehearse, you become. What you claim, you defend. Pick better inputs, and the outputs quietly move.

The version of you that this time next year is glad you started, start rehearsing them today.

🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts.  

Watch me on YouTube

https://youtu.be/pEYzBTBtNi0

Listen to the True From Podcast
Apple Podcasts - https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/the-true-form-podcast/id1593804496

Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/show/6RVH2O6MbLOCohBKPhXO0L?si=ZI8D3MnhSfSjnohSXYN_MQ

Everywhere els - https://trueform.buzzsprout.com

Sponsor: If you’re interested in trying red and near-infrared light therapy for recovery, pain, and overall health, check out Lumaflex. Use code TRUEFORM for 10% off: https://lumaflex.com.au/TRUEFORM

Motivation vs Inspiration: What 80 Studios Taught Scott Capelin About Values

Why the goal you're chasing might be the wrong one, and how to find the one that actually pulls you forward.

Watch On YouTube

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Watch On YouTube 〰️

TL;DR

• Motivation drags you toward a goal. Inspiration is when the goal drags you. Knowing the difference changes everything.

• Most people spend more time researching a used car than identifying their own values.

• Two simple questions cut through the noise: What do you never have to be reminded to do? and If you had two years to live in perfect health, how would you spend them?

• Your business will never outperform the personal development of its owner.

• Big life changes are just a series of baby steps; the trick is putting your hand up.

  🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts. 

Introduction

Scott Capelin was one week out from a bodybuilding competition when a seminar facilitator asked him a simple question: "If you had two years to live, what would you actually do?" Scott wrote down family, freedom, travel. The facilitator circled those three words on his page and said, "Those are your values." Scott pushed back, "No, my values are business and the gym." The facilitator shook his head. "If you had two years to live, you're not going to go to work every day. You're not going to go to the gym every day. They're not your values." Scott started crying in the room.

That moment, he says, was the biggest turning point of his life.

Scott Capelin went from a corporate desk job in his early 20s into personal training, the opposite direction most people in the fitness industry take. He's now clocked over 30,000 hours of coaching, written two books, owned five personal training studios, and today runs In Life Wellness, a boutique Reformer Pilates franchise with close to 80 locations across Australia, the US and New Zealand. He built it with zero franchise marketing and spent eight years off social media while he was at it.

If you've ever felt stuck chasing goals that don't seem to fit, this conversation is for you.

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Listen On Apple Podcast 〰️

Listen On Spotify

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Listen On Spotify 〰️

Motivation vs inspiration: the difference that changes everything

What it is: Motivation is when you drag yourself toward a goal; hot coals, pep talks, sheer force of will. Inspiration is when the goal drags you. You can't do it.

Why it matters: If you're constantly needing to psych yourself up for something, that's a signal. Scott's view is blunt: if the goal isn't pulling you, you're either chasing the wrong one or the "why" behind it isn't strong enough.

How to apply it:

1. Notice what you already do without needing reminders. That's inspiration in action.

2. When you feel resistance, don't assume you're lazy. Ask whether the goal itself is misaligned.

3. Reserve motivation for the days inspiration is having a quiet one, but don't build a whole life on it.

Pro tip: Scott's snooze rule, "If you're hitting snooze seven times, that's a sign you're not into it." Your alarm clock is running a values audit every morning.

Try this today: Write down one thing on your to-do list you've been dragging yourself toward. Ask yourself: Is this a motivation problem, or a values problem?

How to find your values (the two questions that cut through)

What it is: Most people never stop to identify what they actually care about. Scott: "Most people spend more time researching a used car to purchase than identifying their own values."

Why it matters: Without clear values, you end up living someone else's: a parent's, a partner's, society's. That's where anxiety and low-grade unhappiness quietly settle in.

How to apply it:

1. Ask yourself: What do I never have to be reminded to do? That answer is a huge clue.

2. Ask yourself: If I had two years to live in perfect health, how would I spend them, and who with? Write it down.

3. Google "list of personal core values" and circle the ones that hit. Keep it under eight.

4. Use your values as a filter for future decisions. If a choice doesn't support them, it's a no.

Common mistake: Confusing goals with values. Losing 10kg is a goal. Freedom, family or growth is a value.

Try this today: Do the two-year exercise. Just write the list. Don't edit.

Why your business will never outgrow you

What it is: Scott's operating principle: "A business will never outperform the level of personal development of its owner."

Why it matters: If your income, your team, or your results feel stuck, the bottleneck is rarely the market. It's you. That's uncomfortable, but it's also the most empowering news you'll hear all week, because it means you have the lever.

How to apply it:

1. Treat your personal development as a business expense, not a nice-to-have.

2. Read one short book a month. Scott points out most books deliver the message in the first couple of chapters; you don't need 300 pages.

3. Use free tools: podcasts, YouTube summaries, Blinkist. "A good message can get to you in two minutes."

4. Find one mentor who's 2-3 steps ahead of you. Even an author counts.

Pro tip: Scott's line, "Your happiness, your fulfilment and your income are directly proportionate to the value you're adding to the world." If any of the three feels stuck, ask how you can add more value.

Try this today: Book 20 minutes this week for something that grows you: a chapter, a podcast, a walk with a voice memo of ideas.

Big leaps are just a series of baby steps

What it is: When something feels too big to start a career change, a business, an instructor certification, Scott reframes it as a chain of small, low-stakes moves.

Why it matters: Overwhelm kills more dreams than failure does. Most people don't quit because they can't do the work; they quit because the size of the leap feels impossible from where they're standing.

How to apply it:

1. Identify the first tiny step. Not the fifth. The first. (For an instructor, it's simply making the inquiry.)

2. Give yourself permission to stop after each step, you're not locked in.

3. Use the five-minute rule: commit to just five minutes. Two hours later, you're often still going.

4. Remember Scott's phrase: "To begin, begin." Sometimes the thought of the thing is worse than the thing itself.

Common mistake: Trying to see the whole staircase before taking step one. You don't need to.

Try this today: Pick one thing you've been putting off. Do the smallest possible version of the first step in the next five minutes.

Program the subconscious with a written vision

What it is: Scott writes out a "vision statement" a present-tense description of the life he's building, and revisits it regularly. The goal isn't the writing itself. It's programming the 95% of your mind that runs on autopilot.

Why it matters: Scott's view: our subconscious drives most of our thoughts, decisions and results. If you don't feed it a picture of the life you want, it defaults to whatever's already there.

How to apply it:

1. Score each area of your life out of 10: money, relationships, health, career, fun, family. Notice where the wheel is wonky.

2. Write what you don't want. Flip it into what you do want. Turn that into a present-tense story.

3. Revisit annually at minimum. Some people rewrite theirs daily. Find what works.

4. Focus on the "why" behind each goal. Scott's rule: "A strong why beats any how or what."

Pro tip: You don't need to know how it'll happen. Identify the why and let the how take care of itself.

Try this today: Write one paragraph describing your life 12 months from now, in present tense, as if it's already true.

The aeroplane rule: look after yourself first

What it is: Scott's answer to the closing question, "What's one thing every person should do every day?" was this: identify your values, then reflect daily on whether you're living in line with them. And underneath that: look after yourself first.

Why it matters: The aeroplane analogy is a cliché because it's true. If you're depleted, resentful or running on fumes, you're not helping anyone around you; you're just harder to be around.

How to apply it:

1. Take 45-60 minutes a day that's just for you. Exercise, quiet, a walk, a book.

2. Stop treating self-care as selfish. Reframe it as the price of showing up well for everyone else.

3. Notice which needs are being met and which aren't. Scott references Tony Robbins' six human needs: certainty, uncertainty, love/connection, significance, growth, contribution.

4. Give your partner or family the same permission. Their wellbeing lifts yours.

Common mistake: Waiting until you're burnt out to protect your energy. By then, the cost is much higher.

Try this today: Block 45 minutes in tomorrow's calendar for yourself. Non-negotiable.

The moment that changed everything

The seminar story is worth sitting with. Scott had walked in that day convinced his values were business and the gym. He was one week out from a bodybuilding competition. He had every reason to believe he had it figured out.

Then the facilitator asked one question: what would you do with two years? and the truth arrived faster than his defences could rise. Family. Freedom. Travel. He wrote them down without thinking, and when the facilitator circled those three words, Scott's whole story about who he was cracked open.

"I said, 'Oh my God, I've been such an idiot,'" Scott recalled. "He said, 'You haven't been an idiot. You just haven't understood what your values are or how to identify them.'"

That's the whole lesson in one sentence. Most of us aren't broken. We just haven't done the work of figuring out what we actually care about, and we spend years chasing goals that were never really ours.

Quick wins checklist

• Do the two-year exercise. Write who you'd spend it with and how.

• List what you never have to be reminded to do. Circle the patterns.

• Pick one goal you're currently dragging yourself toward. Ask if the "why" is strong enough.

• Write a one-paragraph vision of your life 12 months from now, in present tense.

• Block 45 minutes tomorrow that belongs only to you.

• Take the first tiny step on something you've been putting off, in the next five minutes.

Closing insight

The gap between motivation and inspiration isn't a productivity problem. It's an identity problem. When your goals line up with your values, the effort stops feeling like effort: you get out of bed, you do the work, you take the leap, because the alternative is unthinkable. When they don't line up, no amount of willpower will save you. You'll just get better at dragging yourself somewhere you never really wanted to go. Scott's story is a reminder that the answers are usually simpler than we think, and the questions worth asking are the ones we've been avoiding. Two years. What would you do?

🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts.  

Watch me on YouTube

https://youtu.be/pEYzBTBtNi0 

Listen to the True From Podcast
Apple Podcasts - https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/the-true-form-podcast/id1593804496

Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/show/6RVH2O6MbLOCohBKPhXO0L?si=ZI8D3MnhSfSjnohSXYN_MQ

Everywhere els - https://trueform.buzzsprout.com

Sponsor: If you’re interested in trying red and near-infrared light therapy for recovery, pain, and overall health, check out Lumaflex. Use code TRUEFORM for 10% off: https://lumaflex.com.au/TRUEFORM

Reinvent, Don't Retire: What a 55-Year-Old Taught Me About Living Well

A practical guide to purpose, permission, and building a health span that actually lasts.

Watch On YouTube

〰️

Watch On YouTube 〰️

TL;DR

• Why the "retire at 67 and life is amazing" story is an illusion, and what to do instead.

• How your health works exactly like a compound investment (and why most people give up on it).

• The difference between purpose and ego, and a simple test to tell them apart.

• Why putting yourself first is the least selfish thing a parent can do.

• The one reframe that makes taking risks in midlife easier: "when I had more, I risked less."

• A concrete Quick Wins checklist you can start on today.

🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts. 

Introduction

At 55, Maz O'Connor had the life she'd put on her vision board 15 years earlier. A beautiful property in Somers on Victoria's Mornington Peninsula. Her own yoga and event space. Dolphins and koalas out the back. A partner. A community. By every external measure, she'd arrived.

Then she sold everything but the house, car included, and moved to Bali, not knowing where she was going to live.

Maz is a former nutritionist, radio host, and the founder of The Longevity Project, a platform helping women 55+ navigate what she calls the "third act" of life with health, purpose, and freedom. She's a single mum who raised two boys, worked at one of Australia's leading health retreats decades ago, and has spent her career being what she describes as "a lighthouse" for other women who suspect their best chapter is still ahead.

This is one of the most practical, generous conversations I've had on the podcast. Whether you're 25 or 65, Maz's blueprint for reinvention, longevity, and living deliberately applies. Here are the five biggest lessons I pulled from our chat, and exactly how to use them.

Listen On Apple Podcast

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Listen On Apple Podcast 〰️

Listen On Spotify

〰️

Listen On Spotify 〰️

Lesson 1: Treat Your Health Like a Compound Investment

What It Is: The same maths that grows a super balance over 30 years grows your health over 30 years; small daily inputs, invisible for a long time, then compounding into something powerful.

Why It Matters: Most people quit on their health long before it pays off, because unlike an investment portfolio, you can't see the line going up on a graph. Understanding that the curve is invisible… but real, is what keeps you consistent when nothing seems to be changing.

How To Apply It:

1. Pick one input you can repeat daily (sleep, water, steps, protein at breakfast, just one).

2. Set the bar at 1% better than yesterday, not 100% perfect.

3. Track it the same way you'd track a bank balance a simple log or app, checked weekly.

4. Add a second habit only when the first has been consistent for four weeks.

5. Re-measure your baseline every three months, not every day. Health compounds slowly.

Pro Tip: If you can't see progress, you'll assume there is none. Choose one objective measurement (sleep hours, resting heart rate, a lift number) so the invisible becomes visible.

Try This Today: Write down one health input you'll do daily for the next 30 days. Just one.

Lesson 2: The 67 Illusion: Why Retirement Isn't the Finish Line

What It Is: The cultural story that says "grind now, retire at 67, and life gets amazing" is a myth. With longer lifespans, a third of your life will now happen after retirement, and neither the government nor your super is built for that timeframe.

Why It Matters: If a third of your life is retirement, you can't afford to arrive at it broken, bored, or without purpose. The people who thrive after 55 didn't wait for permission or a date on a calendar, they started building the life they wanted decades earlier.

How To Apply It:

1. Stop treating 67 as a magic number. Choose a "life I want to be living" date instead.

2. Audit what you'd need: physically, financially, mentally, to actually live that life.

3. Identify the one skill or asset that takes the longest to build, and start it now.

4. Talk to someone who is 10–20 years older and already living that life. Ask them what they wish they'd started earlier.

5. Reframe retirement as "reinvention" a chapter change, not an ending.

Pro Tip: Never confuse longevity with health span. Living longer is not the goal. Living well, longer, is.

Try This Today: Send one message to someone living the kind of third act you want. Ask them one question.

Lesson 3: Purpose vs Ego: The Test That Cuts Through the Noise

What It Is: Purpose is what you'd still do if no one was watching, paying, or clapping. Ego is what you do for the applause. Both look identical from the outside.

Why It Matters: Chasing external validation; the car, the followers, the round number in the bank, creates a treadmill that never satisfies. Purpose, by contrast, is the only source of meaning that doesn't require constant refuelling from strangers.

How To Apply It:

1. Write down the activity or goal you're currently chasing.

2. Ask: "Would I still do this if no one ever knew?" Answer honestly.

3. If the answer is no, don't quit it, just be honest about why you're doing it.

4. Look for one activity where the answer is a genuine yes. Do more of that.

5. Notice when validation shows up as a nice bonus vs when it's the whole point.

Maz found her shift through Vedic meditation, taught to her by Tim Mitchell, a practice she describes as "a really beautiful, gentle, soft mirror of I see you, and it's okay, and there's another way." You don't need to meditate to run the test. You just need to be willing to answer the question honestly.

Pro Tip: Purpose usually feels quieter than ego. If a goal is loud, ask what's making the noise.

Try This Today: Pick your busiest task tomorrow and ask the "would I still do it if no one knew?" question before you start.

Lesson 4: Give Yourself Permission: The Third Act Is Yours to Design

What It Is: The "third act" (a phrase Maz borrowed from Jane Fonda) is the stage of life after the child-raising years, once the identity of "mum" or "dad" or "career-builder" softens and a new identity is waiting to be chosen. And no one is coming to hand you permission to design it. You have to give it to yourself.

Why It Matters: Many people, especially women spend decades being the lighthouse for everyone else. When the children move out, the career winds down, or the relationship changes, they're left with a question they've never had time to ask: who do I want to be? The people who thrive in this chapter are the ones who stop waiting for someone else to greenlight it.

How To Apply It:

1. Do a vision board: writing, images, whatever works, and put the yoga studio (or its equivalent) on it.

2. When the voice says "who are you to live like this?", write that voice down too. Naming it takes its power away.

3. Identify three people already living the life you want, even virtually. Follow them, DM them, learn how they got there.

4. Do one visible thing this month that gives yourself permission; book the course, join the community, take the first step.

5. Expect the pushback. Someone in your life will "laugh" at you. Maz's response is worth stealing: "Mate, you've seen nothing yet."

Pro Tip: The people laughing are usually seeing themselves through their own lens, not you through yours. That's their limit, not yours.

Try This Today: Write down one dream you shut down in your own head this year. Just write it. That's permission.

Lesson 5: Put Yourself First (It's the Least Selfish Thing You Can Do)

What It Is: Prioritising your own sleep, movement, and mental health isn't at the expense of the people who rely on you. It's the mechanism that makes you capable of showing up for them.

Why It Matters: Maz was a single mum of two young boys practising Bikram yoga three to four times a week — a serious time and money investment. Her youngest would cry when she left. One Saturday she came home to a drawing the boys had made that read: "Mummy's happy because Mum does yoga." The point isn't yoga. The point is that children (and partners, and colleagues) don't need you to be a martyr. They need you to be well.

How To Apply It:

1. Pick one non-negotiable. Mark Boris's is bedtime. Maz's was Bikram. Yours might be a morning walk.

2. Set an alarm for it. Maz has a 9:30pm alarm that says "I'm excited, I'm going to bed."

3. Communicate it to the people around you — not as a rule, but as an act of self-honouring.

4. Habit-stack it. Attach the new habit to something you already do (glass of water after every bathroom visit).

5. Notice the second-order effect: the energy, patience, and presence you have for other people because you did the thing.

Here's the line worth pinning to your fridge:

"I do this because it makes me a better mama. And when I'm a better mama, we get to have more adventures." - Maz O'Connor

Pro Tip: The word "selfish" often gets thrown at the habits that make you a better partner, parent, or friend. Notice who's throwing it, and why.

Try This Today: Set one alarm on your phone for a non-negotiable self-care action. Name it something you'd actually respond to.

Lesson 6: When You Have More, You Risk Less: The Case for Owning Less

What It Is: The more possessions, obligations, and financial commitments you accumulate, the more risk-averse you become, because there's more to protect. Reducing what you carry can, counterintuitively, unlock more freedom and more opportunity.

Why It Matters: Most of us assume that stuff, savings, and status create safety. Maz's experience, selling her house years earlier to rent, then selling her car and most possessions to move to Bali, points to the opposite. Reducing outgoings created room to take the risks that actually built the next chapter.

How To Apply It:

1. List the three biggest fixed costs in your life. Ask which ones exist because you truly need them, and which because you inherited an expectation.

2. Identify one material thing you're holding onto out of "I might need it one day" logic. Test living without it for a month.

3. Track what your monthly cost of living would be if you halved one category (housing, transport, subscriptions).

4. Reinvest the freed-up money, or the freed-up mental space, into something that grows you (education, travel, a business idea).

5. Notice how your appetite for risk changes as your obligations shrink.

Pro Tip: "I need a car" is worth interrogating. So is "I need this house," "I need this job," and "I need to live in this suburb." Not all of them will hold up.

Try This Today: Open your bank statement. Circle one recurring cost you haven't questioned in 12 months.

Pull Quotes Worth Sitting With

"It's never too late to start." - Maz O'Connor

"I sold everything but the house, car included, and I moved to Bali, not knowing where I was going to live." - Maz O'Connor

"When I had more, I risked less." - Maz O'Connor

"Who we are when no one's watching is our character." - Maz O'Connor

Quick Wins Checklist (Do These Today)

• Write down one health habit you'll do daily for the next 30 days.

• Send one message to someone already living the life you want. Ask them one question.

• Set a non-negotiable bedtime alarm on your phone tonight.

• Write down one dream you shut down in your own head this year, no action required, just name it.

• Open your bank statement and circle one recurring cost you haven't questioned in 12 months.

• Ask the "would I still do this if no one knew?" test on your busiest task tomorrow.

Closing Insight

The most useful thing about Maz's story isn't that she moved to Bali. It's that she waited 15 years, manifested the exact life she'd dreamt of, arrived there, and then had the courage to say there's more. Reinvention isn't reserved for people who are unhappy. It's available to anyone willing to keep asking better questions. Your health, your purpose, your relationships, and your risk appetite all compound in the same direction, quietly, invisibly, and then all at once. The people who thrive in their third act didn't get lucky. They started earlier, stayed consistent, and gave themselves permission before anyone else did. You can start today. You don't need permission. You already have it.

🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts.  

Watch me on YouTube

https://youtu.be/XGZaJG6i-R8

Listen to the True From Podcast
Apple Podcasts - https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/the-true-form-podcast/id1593804496

Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/show/6RVH2O6MbLOCohBKPhXO0L?si=ZI8D3MnhSfSjnohSXYN_MQ

Everywhere els - https://trueform.buzzsprout.com

Sponsor: If you’re interested in trying red and near-infrared light therapy for recovery, pain, and overall health, check out Lumaflex. Use code TRUEFORM for 10% off: https://lumaflex.com.au/TRUEFORM

Earn the Right: Kyle Gonzalez on Health That Actually Lasts

Why the free habits you're skipping matter more than any supplement, and how to build a routine that actually sticks.

Watch On YouTube

〰️

Watch On YouTube 〰️

TL;DR

• Why up to 90–95% of your health results might be sitting in habits that cost nothing.

• The real reason "perfect routines" fail, and what actually works instead.

• How finding your "why" keeps you going when motivation runs out

• Why enjoying your movement matters more than doing the "optimal" workout.

• The one free, no-equipment habit Kyle Gonzalez says moves the needle more than almost anything else.

🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts. 

Introduction

At a networking event a few weeks back, I found myself surrounded by five or six blokes firing off questions one after another. What supplement should I take? Is this exercise worth it? Should I be worried about that? It's the same question dressed up a hundred different ways, and it usually points to the same problem: we've been sold the idea that health is complicated.

Kyle Gonzalez doesn't think so. Kyle Gonzalez (MS, CSCS Certified Strength and Conditioning Specialist) has spent more than a decade coaching, teaching and building health programs, and he now serves as Vice President of Performance and Coaching at Coya, a human performance company. He's a former Division 1 athlete, the author of Move, Thrive, and Come Alive, and host of The Vitality System Podcast.

In this episode, Kyle makes the case that most of us are overcomplicating our health while ignoring the free stuff that actually works. We get into why you have to "earn the right to supplement," why the perfect routine is a myth, how he rebuilt his career by choosing to be the only instead of the best, and the one simple daily habit he believes moves the needle more than almost anything else. If you've ever felt like you're doing "everything right" and still not seeing results, this one's for you.

Listen On Apple Podcast

〰️

Listen On Apple Podcast 〰️

Listen On Spotify

〰️

Listen On Spotify 〰️

Lesson 1: Earn the Right to Supplement, Start With What's Free

What It Is: Before you spend money on supplements or fancy interventions, master the free basics first: sunlight, movement, sleep, whole food, and good company.

Why It Matters: We're marketed at constantly, told we need a product or service to be healthy. Kyle argues the opposite is true: the biggest health wins are free, and skipping them means you're leaving most of the benefit on the table before you've even started.

How To Apply It:

1. List every free health input available to you right now: sleep, sunlight, walking, real food, social connection.

2. Rate yourself honestly out of ten on each one, before you buy anything new.

3. Pick the lowest-scoring area and commit to improving just that one for two to four weeks.

4. Hold off on any new supplement purchase until you've genuinely nailed the basics for at least a month.

Pro Tip: A common mistake is jumping straight to an expensive supplement stack while skipping sleep and whole foods — you're paying for a small slice of benefit while ignoring the biggest one.

Try This Today: Write down five free habits: sunlight, community, movement, whole food, sleep, and circle the one you're doing worst.

"I always say you have to earn the right to supplement." - Kyle Gonzalez

Lesson 2: Consistency Beats Perfection, The 30–90 Day Rule

What It Is: Sustainable results come from imperfect but consistent action over 30 to 90-plus days, not from a flawless routine.

Why It Matters: We've been sold instant gratification and quick-fix culture. Kyle sees this constantly with clients who try something for a week, don't feel a dramatic difference, and quit. Real change compounds slowly, and giving up early means you never get to see the benefit at all.

How To Apply It:

1. Pick one or two habits to focus on, not eighteen.

2. Commit to a minimum timeframe before judging results, at least 30 days, ideally six to twelve weeks.

3. Aim to show up even at 50% or 30% effort on hard days, rather than skipping entirely.

4. Track whether you showed up, not whether you did it perfectly.

5. Treat missed days as information, not failure.

Pro Tip: The faster a change comes, the faster it tends to disappear. If you want it to last, let it build slowly.

Try This Today: Pick one habit you dropped after a rough week and recommit to it tomorrow, even at half effort.

"The quicker you gain something, the quicker it is for you to lose it." - Kyle Gonzalez

Lesson 3: Find Your Why Before You Find Your Plan

What It Is: Your deeper motivation for wanting to be healthy matters more than the specific plan you follow, because it's what keeps you going when motivation fades.

Why It Matters: Plans fall apart when life gets messy: travel, stress, holidays, bad weeks. A vague goal like "lose weight" won't get you out of bed on those days. A strong, personal reason will.

How To Apply It:

1. Ask yourself why you want to be healthier, then ask "why" again to your own answer, three to five times, until you get past the surface-level goal.

2. Write your why down somewhere you'll actually see it.

3. Reconnect with it whenever motivation dips, especially during travel, stress, or busy periods.

4. Use it to decide what you're willing to sacrifice, and what you're not.

5. Choose your specific method only after your why is clear; stay flexible on how you get there.

Pro Tip: There are a thousand different paths to the same goal. Being clear on the destination matters far more than following someone else's exact route.

Try This Today: Spend two minutes writing one sentence answering, "Why do I actually want to be healthier?"

Lesson 4: Make Movement Enjoyable So It Actually Sticks

What It Is: Long-term exercise adherence depends more on enjoyment than on finding the "optimal" or most intense program.

Why It Matters: Willpower is a limited, tiring resource. If every workout feels like a grind you're forcing yourself through, you'll eventually stop. Finding movement you genuinely like removes that friction and makes consistency far easier.

How To Apply It:

1. List types of movement you haven't tried: walking, rowing, hiking, strength training, a team sport.

2. Test one new option a month with zero pressure to be good at it straight away.

3. Start smaller than you think you need to. Build the habit first, then improve it.

4. Notice which sessions you look forward to versus dread, and lean into the ones you enjoy.

5. Let your routine evolve as your interests change rather than sticking rigidly to one method forever.

Pro Tip: A common mistake is going "all or nothing" with an ambitious plan that collapses after two rough days, damaging your confidence in the process.

Try This Today: Pick one small, enjoyable movement option: a ten-minute walk, a stretch, a beginner workout, and do it today without trying to make it perfect.

Lesson 5: Trust Wearable Data as a Guide, Not a Verdict

What It Is: Fitness trackers and smartwatches are useful for spotting trends over time, but their numbers aren't perfectly accurate; treat them as reliable, not as gospel.

Why It Matters: Kyle points out that wearables tend to over-predict things like step counts and calories burned. Some people even develop what's sometimes called orthosomnia, stress caused by obsessing over a sleep score or step count, where a single "bad" number ruins their whole day, even though the number itself may not be precise.

How To Apply It:

1. Use your wearable to spot patterns over weeks, not to judge a single day.

2. Remember that step counts and calorie estimates are usually a little inflated.

3. If a low score is wrecking your mood or motivation, take the device off for a few weeks and reassess.

4. Ask yourself what you're actually optimising for, then check whether the wearable is helping or adding stress.

5. Don't stop moving just because you forgot to hit "start" on the app; the activity still happened, and it still counts.

Pro Tip: Reliable means you can trust the trend line. It doesn't always mean the exact number is correct.

Try This Today: If you wear a tracker, ignore today's single-day score and look at your seven-day trend instead.

Lesson 6: Walking Is the Most Underrated Longevity Habit

What It Is: Walking is one of the simplest, most accessible habits for long-term health, and even a small increase in daily steps appears to matter.

Why It Matters: Walking needs no equipment, no gym membership, and no experience, yet Kyle points to real benefits for mood, blood flow, digestion, and long-term health risk. He specifically mentions that adding around 1,000 extra steps a day, about ten to fifteen minutes of walking, has been linked to a 21–23% reduction in mortality risk. (Note: the specific research source for this statistic was not named in the episode.)

How To Apply It:

1. Get a rough sense of your current daily step count as a baseline.

2. Aim to add roughly 1,000 extra steps a day rather than jumping straight to 10,000.

3. Attach walks to habits you already have: after meals, during phone calls, first thing in the morning.

4. Walk outside where you can, for the added benefit of sunlight and fresh air.

5. Leave your phone at home occasionally so the walk becomes a mental reset, not another screen session.

Pro Tip: If you can't walk more, it's usually a sign your schedule needs a genuine look, Kyle suggests even an under-desk treadmill as a workaround for very busy days.

Try This Today: Take one ten to fifteen minute walk today, ideally without your phone.

Mini Case: Building an Unconventional Career

Kyle didn't plan his current role. He started as a personal trainer straight out of a kinesiology degree, then took a leap most people wouldn't — a startup job that meant moving away from everything familiar. Surrounded by entrepreneurial thinkers in a new city, he began picking up marketing, writing, recruiting and operations almost by accident, eventually working his way from coach to marketing manager to head of content, all while staying rooted in health and performance.

His philosophy for that leap has stuck with him ever since:

"I didn't strive to be the best. I try, I strive to be the only." - Kyle Gonzalez

Rather than competing to be the best personal trainer in an already crowded market, he built a completely unique combination of skills that let him create roles that didn't exist before. It's a lesson that applies well beyond fitness careers.

Quick Wins Checklist (Do These Today)

• Write down your five free health habits and circle your weakest one

• Write one sentence about why you actually want to be healthier

• Take a ten to fifteen minute walk without your phone

• Pick one small, enjoyable movement habit and do it today, no matter how small

• If you wear a tracker, check your seven-day trend instead of today's single score

• Hold off on any new supplement purchase until you've reviewed your basics

Closing Insight

Health doesn't need to be complicated, and it definitely doesn't need to be expensive. The habits that matter most — sleep, movement, sunlight, real food, good people, and a clear sense of why you're doing any of it — are already available to you, free of charge. The people who see lasting results aren't the ones with the perfect plan; they're the ones who keep showing up, imperfectly, for months rather than days. Kyle's own career is proof the same principle stretches far beyond fitness: consistency, curiosity, and a willingness to build your own path tend to beat chasing someone else's idea of "the best." Start small, start free, and give it more than a week before deciding whether it's working.

🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts.  

Watch me on YouTube

https://youtu.be/yoWjxBp47tU 

Listen to the True From Podcast
Apple Podcasts - https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/the-true-form-podcast/id1593804496

Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/show/6RVH2O6MbLOCohBKPhXO0L?si=ZI8D3MnhSfSjnohSXYN_MQ

Everywhere els - https://trueform.buzzsprout.com

Sponsor: If you’re interested in trying red and near-infrared light therapy for recovery, pain, and overall health, check out Lumaflex. Use code TRUEFORM for 10% off: https://lumaflex.com.au/TRUEFORM

Your Trauma Built Your Success With Naila Ahmed

How high performers create empires from not-enoughness, and what it actually takes to keep the success without the suffering.

Watch On YouTube

〰️

Watch On YouTube 〰️

TL;DR

• The same wiring that makes high performers brilliant at their craft is often the wiring keeping them awake at 3 am.

• External success and internal peace are not a trade-off; most people just haven't learned to hold both.

• Optimisation culture has quietly become another form of self-abandonment.

• When it gets heavy, the answer isn't a biohack. It's lying down, drinking water, breathing, and letting yourself feel it.

• Boredom is a non-negotiable. Ten minutes a day. Phone away. That's the prescription.

  🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts. 

Introduction

Naila Ahmed is back on the podcast for a second time, and she's recording this one from New York, ten months into a life with no home base, no return date, and no plan. She's a holistic counsellor and trauma therapist who works almost exclusively with high performers. In the months since our first conversation, something has shifted in the pattern she keeps seeing across her client roster.

The pattern is this: successful men and women who, without realising it, built their business, their body, or their reputation on top of unresolved trauma. The exact traits that made them relentless operators- control, hyper-vigilance, the feeling of never being enough- are now the same traits keeping them up at night with cortisol through the roof. They've achieved what they set out to achieve, and underneath, they're falling apart.

This episode is a follow-up to our first one, but you don't need to have heard it. It stands on its own. We get into what Naila has learned about identity when everything external has been stripped away, why "optimising" is quietly costing people the parts of life they enjoy most, and the small, unsexy rituals she gives every client, including the ones running five hotels who "don't have time" for any of it.

If you've built something real and you're starting to wonder what it's costing you underneath, this one is for you.

Listen On Apple Podcast

〰️

Listen On Apple Podcast 〰️

Listen On Spotify

〰️

Listen On Spotify 〰️

Lesson 1: Your Trauma Can Be a Double-Edged Sword

What It Is: The same childhood patterns that create your greatest strengths as an operator often create your deepest suffering as a person. Same wiring. Both outcomes.

Why It Matters: Most high performers assume they need to protect the patterns that built their success. Naila's work suggests the opposite: those patterns can stay useful once you understand them, but if you don't, they will run you into the ground. As she puts it, "your trauma can be a double-edged sword. It can be your greatest downfall, and it can also be the reason that you're so good at what you do."

How To Apply It:

1. Name the trait that makes you good at your work: control, hyper-vigilance, perfectionism, the feeling of never being enough.

2. Ask honestly where that trait came from. Most of the time, it started before you were old enough to choose it.

3. Notice where the same trait is costing you: sleep, relationships, presence, health.

4. Separate the useful function of the trait from the unconscious driver underneath.

5. Get support to work on the driver, not the trait itself. You're not trying to become less capable.

Pro Tip: The goal is not to dismantle what made you successful. It's to keep the output while changing the fuel.

Try This Today: Write down the sentence: "The thing I'm best at came from ." Sit with what comes up.

Lesson 2: External Success and Internal Peace Are Not a Trade-Off

What It Is: The assumption that healing will cost you your edge is one of the biggest reasons high performers avoid the work. In practice, it's not true.

Why It Matters: A lot of the people Naila works with are quietly terrified that if they slow down, examine their patterns, or address their trauma, the whole external structure will collapse. So they keep grinding, keep numbing, and keep suffering underneath. Her point on the episode is simple: you can have the external success and the internal peace. They're not mutually exclusive. Most people just haven't been shown how to hold both.

How To Apply It:

1. Notice when your ego frames healing as a threat to your success.

2. Question the belief. Where did you first learn that suffering was the price of achievement?

3. Look for models of people who hold both. They exist.

4. Start small. You don't have to burn down the business to work on yourself.

5. Track the metrics that actually matter to you: sleep, energy, relationships, presence, alongside the financial ones.

Pro Tip: If your success is dependent on you being unwell, that's not success. That's a pressure system.

Try This Today: List two things you'd stop doing if you truly believed you were enough. Then ask why you're still doing them.

Lesson 3: Optimisation Culture Has Become Another Form of Self-Abandonment

What It Is: The endless drive to squeeze more efficiency out of your life so you can get more done, at the cost of the small, ordinary things that actually make life feel good.

Why It Matters: Naila and I get into this on the episode, and it's a rant we're both aligned on. Optimising is fine as a tool. As an identity, it starts to eat you. You optimise, get a bit more time, then end up taking on more work. You outsource the cooking, gain an hour, and lose the one part of your day that grounds you. As I say on the episode, "you optimise, get a little bit more time, and then fill it with more junk." What are you actually optimising for?

How To Apply It:

1. List every "optimisation" you've added to your life in the last twelve months.

2. For each one, ask what you gave up to get it.

3. Ask what you're doing with the time or energy you saved.

4. Kill the optimisations that don't have a clear, honest answer to that question.

5. Protect the ordinary rituals: cooking, walking, sitting, that keep you human.

Pro Tip: If a life hack removes something you enjoy so you can do more work, it's not a life hack. It's a trade.

Try This Today: Pick one thing you outsourced for efficiency and do it yourself this week. Cook a meal. Walk instead of driving. Notice what comes back.

Lesson 4: The Overwhelm Protocol: Lie Down, Drink Water, Breathe, Feel It

What It Is: Naila's actual, honest answer for what she does when the pressure of living out of a suitcase in a new city gets too much.

Why It Matters: This was the most vulnerable moment of the episode, and it's the most useful. Not a supplement. Not a cold plunge. Not a mindset reframe. She lies down. Drinks water. Breathes. Sometimes cries. And crucially, she doesn't try to force herself back into a positive mindset. She lets the feeling move through, and then it passes. That's the whole protocol. Most high performers skip the "feel it" step entirely, and the feelings just stack up.

How To Apply It:

1. When you notice you're overwhelmed, stop trying to fix it with more input.

2. Lie down. Actually lie down. On a bed, on the floor, wherever.

3. Drink water.

4. Put one hand on your heart and one hand on your stomach. Breathe.

5. Let the feeling be there. Don't rush it. Don't manage it. Don't reframe it.

6. Wait. It moves. It always moves.

Pro Tip: The goal isn't to feel better in five minutes. The goal is to stop abandoning yourself when things get hard.

Try This Today: Next time you feel the pressure spike, set a ten-minute timer and lie down before you do anything else.

Lesson 5: Celebrating Wins Is a Ritual, Not a Reaction

What It Is: A deliberate, scheduled practice of noticing what you've done, rather than waiting for a milestone big enough to warrant a celebration.

Why It Matters: When your job is helping people, whether that's clients, listeners, or a team, you can go numb to it fast. Message after message, session after session, episode after episode, and none of it lands anymore. Naila's answer is to make reflection a non-negotiable ritual, not a reaction to a big moment. Because if you wait for a big enough moment, it never comes. The goalposts keep moving.

How To Apply It:

1. Pick a fixed time each day. End of the workday and just before sleep both work.

2. Sit or lie still. No phone.

3. Recall one specific conversation, message, or moment from the day.

4. Name what actually happened. Someone was helped. Something was created. Something worked.

5. Say thank you to yourself, to whatever you thank, and mean it.

6. Do it again tomorrow.

Pro Tip: If it feels cliché, that's usually a sign you need it more, not less.

Try This Today: Tonight, before sleep, name three specific things from today that mattered. Not general. Specific.

Lesson 6: You Need to Be Bored Again

What It Is: Deliberate, unstimulated time, no phone, no podcast, no music, no input, where your brain gets to think its own thoughts.

Why It Matters: This is the practice Naila gives every high-performing client. Ten minutes a day. Alarm on. Phone away. Stare at a wall, sit in nature, do nothing. The reason is simple: we've become so used to constant input that we've lost the space where original thought, inspiration, and self-awareness actually happen. And as I say on the episode, even swapping social media for a podcast is still input. Your brain doesn't get the gap it needs.

How To Apply It:

1. Set a ten-minute timer once a day.

2. Put your phone in another room. Not face-down. Another room.

3. No podcast, no music, no book. Nothing coming in.

4. Sit, walk, or lie down. Let your mind wander.

5. Notice what shows up: ideas, feelings, memories, boredom itself. Don't judge any of it.

6. When the timer goes, that's it. You're done.

Pro Tip: Boredom is not a problem to solve. It's the doorway to the thoughts you actually need.

Try This Today: Do the ten minutes before you finish reading anything else on your phone.

Mini Case: The Client Running Five Hotels

Naila shares the story of a client who owns five hotels and is in conversations to buy two more. On paper, he is winning. In reality, he doesn't sleep. His constant refrain is that he doesn't have time for rest, for reflection, for the therapeutic work he actually needs. He dabbles in biohacking on the side, which gives him the feeling of taking care of himself without ever addressing what's driving the whole machine.

"Your trauma can be a double-edged sword. It can be your greatest downfall, and it can also be the reason that you're so good at what you do." - Naila Ahmed

"I lie down, drink water, and I breathe. And sometimes I cry. And I'm like, this is a lot. And then the feeling goes away. I just give myself the space to feel." - Naila Ahmed

"It's like the hardest thing is the uncertainty… and how healing that is as well, because I've totally forfeited any type of control." - Naila Ahmed

Quick Wins Checklist (Do These Today)

• Ten minutes, phone in another room, no input at all.

• Before sleep tonight, name three specific things from the day that mattered.

• Cook one meal this week you'd normally outsource, deliver, or skip.

• When overwhelm hits, lie down first. Everything else can wait ten minutes.

• Write down one trait you're best known for, and ask where it originally came from.

• Notice one "optimisation" in your life and question what it actually gave you back.

Closing Insight

The people I speak to who are genuinely doing well aren't the ones with the sharpest morning routines or the most stacked supplement drawers. They're the ones who've done the quieter work, noticing the patterns that built their success, keeping the useful parts, and letting go of the parts that were quietly costing them everything. Naila's whole message on this episode comes back to the same idea we keep landing on across the show: the basics work, presence is a skill, and you cannot optimise your way home to yourself. If you've built something real, protect the person who built it. That's the whole game.

🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts.  

Watch me on YouTube

https://youtu.be/7NO0rN5B0-4 

Listen to the True From Podcast
Apple Podcasts - https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/the-true-form-podcast/id1593804496

Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/show/6RVH2O6MbLOCohBKPhXO0L?si=ZI8D3MnhSfSjnohSXYN_MQ

Everywhere els - https://trueform.buzzsprout.com  

Sponsor: If you’re interested in trying red and near-infrared light therapy for recovery, pain, and overall health, check out Lumaflex. Use code TRUEFORM for 10% off: https://lumaflex.com.au/TRUEFORM

Fight or Father: The Truth About Modern Fatherhood and Men's Mental Health

What one dad learned about vulnerability, self-understanding and showing up, after nearly losing himself first.

Watch On YouTube

〰️

Watch On YouTube 〰️

TL;DR

• Modern fatherhood is harder than most men admit, and pretending otherwise is part of the problem.

• Self-understanding beats self-improvements, you can't change what you haven't examined.

• Small, stackable habits (one meal tracked, one hundred metres run) compound into full transformations.

• A simple four-step framework, Clear the body, Anchor, Lead, Model, helps you switch off work and show up at home.

• Vulnerability is not weakness. For men in particular, it might be the strongest thing you can do.

🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts. 

📖 Get Mitesh's book, Fight or Father: https://link.amazon/B0db49MyC 

Introduction

Nine people take their own lives in Australia every single day. Seven of them are men.

That statistic sits at the centre of my conversation with Mitesh Khatri, author of the new book Fight or Father. Mitesh is a market researcher, a father of two, a husband, and, until fairly recently, one of those men quietly carrying more than he was letting on. At forty, he was the heaviest he'd ever been, stressed at work, snapping at his kids, and, at his lowest point, dialling Beyond Blue because he felt he had no one else to talk to.

Fight or Father is what came out the other side. It began as journal notes, grew into a book he originally wrote for his own children, and has since become something bigger, a practical, honest guide for any dad who's trying.

This episode is not a standard author interview. It's a genuine conversation about what it actually takes to change, physically, emotionally, and as a partner and parent. Whether you're a father or not, the ideas here land, because they're really about the harder work of understanding yourself before trying to improve yourself.

Listen On Apple Podcast

〰️

Listen On Apple Podcast 〰️

Listen On Spotify

〰️

Listen On Spotify 〰️

Lesson 1: Choose Self-Understanding Over Self-Improvement

What It Is: Self-understanding is the practice of examining why you think, feel and react the way you do, before trying to change any of it. It's the layer underneath habit-tracking and productivity hacks.

Why It Matters: Most of us consume endless self-help content and still struggle to change. That's because knowledge alone doesn't shift behaviour, awareness does. Until you understand the pattern driving the behaviour, you'll keep bumping into the same version of yourself.

How To Apply It:

1. Pick one recurring behaviour that frustrates you (snapping at the kids, doom-scrolling, avoiding exercise).

2. Ask "why do I do this?" three times in a row, writing down each answer.

3. Notice whether the root is generational, cultural, or personal, most patterns are inherited from somewhere.

4. Only after that, decide what habit change might actually address the root, not the symptom.

Pro Tip: Don't confuse reading about change with doing the work of change. A dozen self-help books won't move the needle if you skip the reflection step.

Try This Today: Write one sentence answering: What behaviour of mine do I keep repeating that I don't fully understand?

Lesson 2: Journal on Paper to Clear the Mental Load

What It Is: A simple, low-friction writing practice; pen and paper, no app, used to offload the noise in your head and unpack what's underneath it.

Why It Matters: Mitesh describes carrying a constant hum of to-do lists, work stress, family logistics and unspoken worries. Writing it down doesn't solve every problem, but it clears roughly ninety percent of the mental clutter, which is enough to think clearly again.

How To Apply It:

1. Keep a physical diary or notebook by your bed or desk.

2. In the morning or evening, write for five to ten minutes with no structure.

3. On low-energy days, just write three bullet points of what you're grateful for.

4. On heavy days, write a full page about one thing that's weighing on you, describe it, then ask what you'd actually do about it.

5. Don't re-read it. The value is in the offloading, not the archive.

Pro Tip: Digital notes feel efficient but rarely clear your head the same way. There's something about the physical act of writing that closes the loop.

Try This Today: Write three things ruminating in your head right now on a piece of paper. Notice if your shoulders drop.

"Fear has no place on paper." - Mitesh Khatri

Lesson 3: Use the CALM Framework to Switch Off Work and Show Up at Home

What It Is: A four-step transition ritual; Clear the body, Anchor, Lead, Model. Designed to help you consciously change roles when moving from work mode to home mode.

Why It Matters: For anyone working from home or in a hybrid role, the line between work and family life has all but disappeared. Your body doesn't know work is finished unless you tell it. Without a transition, you carry work stress into dinner, bath time and bedtime and the people you love wear the cost.

How To Apply It:

1. Clear the body. Do something physical to signal the shift, cold water on the face, a short walk, a few slow breaths, a change of clothes.

2. Anchor. Take a moment to consciously acknowledge you're switching hats. Say it out loud if you have to: "I'm home now."

3. Lead. Enter the family space with intention. Set the tone, calm, present, engaged, instead of reacting to whatever chaos meets you at the door.

4. Model. Show your kids and partner the behaviour you want to see. Put the phone on the charger. Make eye contact. Ask real questions.

5. When you get it wrong (and you will), repair quickly. Own it, apologise, move on.

Pro Tip: The transition doesn't need to be long. Even three to five minutes between closing the laptop and greeting the family is enough to change the energy you bring.

Try This Today: Tonight, close your laptop, walk to another room, and do three slow breaths before you speak to anyone.

Lesson 4: Start Ridiculously Small and Stack Habits Over Time

What It Is: A method of behaviour change where you begin with one tiny, achievable habit, master it, then layer another on top, instead of overhauling your life in one weekend.

Why It Matters: Most people quit because they try too much too fast, then punish themselves for missing a day. Mitesh's transformation, losing significant weight and rebuilding his fitness in his forties, came from starting with one habit (tracking food) and adding one more only when the first became automatic.

How To Apply It:

1. Pick one habit only. Not three. One.

2. Make the first version of it embarrassingly small. His first run was one hundred metres.

3. Track it, so you can see the pattern building.

4. Aim for consistency, not perfection, think green weeks, not green days.

5. Once it feels automatic, add a second habit. Then a third. Give each one time to bed in.

6. Miss a day? Get back on it the next day. Miss two, and it starts becoming a new habit, of missing.

Pro Tip: Ninety-four percent consistency across a year beats a perfect month followed by six months of nothing.

Try This Today: Choose the smallest possible version of one habit you've been avoiding. Do that version today.

Lesson 5: Understand the Mental Load Your Partner Is Carrying

What It Is: The invisible work of running a household, the planning, remembering, organising and coordinating, that often falls on one partner (frequently the mother) without being seen or shared.

Why It Matters: In most modern households, both partners work. But the mental load, school forms, lunches, groceries, appointments, holiday planning, activities often hasn't rebalanced. This creates quiet resentment, exhaustion, and disconnection, even in loving relationships.

How To Apply It:

1. Sit down and list every recurring task that keeps the household running for a week. Be honest about who's actually doing each one.

2. Pick one full domain, not a task and take it over completely. Laundry. Meal planning. Groceries. Ownership, not helping.

3. Stick with it long enough to get good at it. Expect to fumble the first few weeks.

4. When it becomes stable, take on a second domain.

5. Involve the kids in age-appropriate parts of the work. You're teaching them what a functioning household looks like.

Pro Tip: "Helping" isn't the same as owning. If your partner still has to remind you or check on it, it's still on their mental load.

Try This Today: Ask your partner: "What's one thing I could take off your plate this week, completely?" Then actually do it.

Lesson 6: Redefine Strength as Vulnerability

What It Is: A modern reframing of masculinity where emotional honesty, asking for help, and naming what you're feeling are treated as strengths, not weaknesses.

Why It Matters: Many men were raised to bottle it up, push through, and skip straight to anger when something goes wrong. That pattern leaks into how we parent, how we partner, and at its most tragic, into the mental health statistics that see seven men take their own lives in Australia every single day. Naming what's actually underneath the anger (usually sadness, disappointment, frustration or fear) breaks the cycle.

How To Apply It:

1. When you feel anger rising, pause for five seconds before reacting. Breathe.

2. Ask yourself: what's actually underneath this? Not the trigger, the real feeling.

3. Name it, even silently. "I'm not angry, I'm disappointed." "I'm not angry, I'm scared."

4. Share it with one person you trust. A partner, a mate, a therapist, or a helpline.

5. Build a "crew" a small group of men (or friends) you can be honest with. This might be a men's group, a running club, or a regular catch-up at the pub.

6. If you're struggling, call someone. Beyond Blue in Australia is 1300 22 4636.

Pro Tip: Repair matters more than getting it right the first time. If you snap at your kids or partner, come back later, own it, and show them what accountability looks like.

Try This Today: Send one honest message to a mate. Not "how's the weekend been" - something real.

Mini Case: The Message That Made It All Worth It

Mitesh shared a story about a friend who was reading the book. The friend started putting his phone on the charger when his kids got home from school. Within days, his wife messaged Mitesh unprompted to say her husband seemed different, more engaged, more present.

The same friend also started running again, one minute on, one minute off. He told Mitesh he was smiling as he ran.

"Those two things I just told him, that just made my day, that message. And that makes it all worth it. If I can help one person." - Mitesh Khatri

Small changes. Real ripples.

Quick Wins Checklist (Do These Today)

• Put your phone on the charger in another room when your family walks through the door.

• Write three things ruminating in your head on a physical piece of paper.

• Do one hundred metres of running, or a five-minute walk, whichever feels smallest.

• Ask your partner what one task you could take off their plate this week.

• Send one honest, non-logistical message to a mate.

• Pause for five seconds before reacting the next time you feel anger rise.

Closing Insight

The through-line of this conversation isn't really about fatherhood. It's about the quiet cost of pretending you're fine when you're not, and the surprisingly small actions that begin to turn that around. Mitesh didn't transform his health, his marriage, or his relationship with his kids in a single weekend. He started with one journal entry, one meal tracked, one hundred metres run, and a phone call to Beyond Blue that he almost didn't make.

The lesson underneath every lesson is this: you don't need a new life. You need one honest look in the mirror, one small action today, and one person you're brave enough to talk to. That's how it starts. And if you're reading this thinking of someone who might need to hear it, send it to them. That's how it continues.

If you're struggling, please reach out. Beyond Blue: 1300 22 4636. Lifeline: 13 11 14.

📖 Get Mitesh's book, Fight or Father: https://link.amazon/B0db49MyC 

🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts.

Watch me on YouTube

https://youtu.be/WRHjF3RWBOI 

Listen to the True From Podcast:

Apple Podcast -

https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/the-true-form-podcast/id1593804496

Spotify -

https://open.spotify.com/show/6RVH2O6MbLOCohBKPhXO0L?si=ZI8D3MnhSfSjnohSXYN_MQ

Everywhere els - 

https://trueform.buzzsprout.com

Sponsor: If you’re interested in trying red and near-infrared light therapy for recovery, pain, and overall health, check out Lumaflex. Use code TRUEFORM for 10% off: https://lumaflex.com.au/TRUEFORM

300 Episodes. Here's What I Actually Learned

Twelve lessons on mind, body and identity from five years of podcasting, and how to actually use them.

Watch On YouTube

〰️

Watch On YouTube 〰️

TL;DR

• Jack hit 300 episodes of The True Form Podcast and used the milestone to share 12 personal lessons instead of interviewing a guest.

• The biggest shift: the podcast was never really about fitness information, it's about understanding your identity and who you are.

• Health and wealth run on the same discipline: consistency, tracking, and quieting the noise.

• Systems beat motivation every time, because motivation always fades.

• Your nervous system, not just your training program, decides how well you recover and perform.

🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts. 

Introduction

Three hundred episodes is a strange number to sit with. It's not a round, flashy milestone like episode 100, but it's enough episodes that you start to notice patterns, in your guests, in your listeners, and in yourself.

For this episode, Jack didn't bring on a guest. Instead, he sat down alone and worked through 12 lessons about mind, body and identity that he's picked up over four to five years of podcasting.

The podcast started during Covid as a resource for his personal training clients, simple episodes on sleep, nutrition and exercise. About 150 episodes in, Jack deleted most of them. He'd realised the show was never really about information. It was about understanding ourselves, our identity, and who we are.

As he puts it, "If information was the missing key in our lives, there's an abundance of it. We all know that... we'd all be walking around with six packs, millions of dollars, and the happiest life ever." Clearly, information alone was never the answer.

This episode matters because it's less about facts and more about the mindset shifts that actually move the needle, for your body, your health, and your sense of self. It's a personal growth podcast moment distilled into one episode, built from lessons in discipline vs motivation, nervous system health, and what it really takes to change your life.

Listen On Apple Podcast

〰️

Listen On Apple Podcast 〰️

Listen On Spotify

〰️

Listen On Spotify 〰️

Lesson 1: Average Effort Is a Warning Sign, Not a Character Flaw

What It Is: If you're only putting in average effort but expecting a full return, that mismatch is telling you something important about whether the goal is actually yours.

Why It Matters: It's easy to beat yourself up for being lazy or inconsistent. But half-effort usually isn't a moral failing, it's data. It's your own behaviour showing you that a goal doesn't truly excite you. Recognising this early saves years of guilt and wasted energy chasing things you never really wanted.

How To Apply It:

1. Notice where you're consistently giving less than full effort.

2. Ask yourself honestly: is this a "hell yeah" or a "hell no"?

3. If it's a "hell no," stop forcing it and redirect that energy elsewhere.

4. If it's a genuine "hell yeah," identify what's blocking full effort and address that directly.

5. Track your energy and enthusiasm for a week to see which goals actually light you up.

Pro Tip: Treat inconsistency as feedback, not failure.

Try This Today: Write down one goal you've been half-committing to and ask yourself honestly: hell yeah, or hell no?

Lesson 2: Treat Your Health Like a Long-Term Investment

What It Is: The same discipline that builds wealth over decades, consistency, tracking, patience, also builds health. You just can't see a health "balance" the way you see a bank balance.

Why It Matters: Health doesn't show up on a chart the way money does, so it's easy to underestimate how much small, repeated actions compound over time. Thinking about health like an investment portfolio helps you commit to the long game instead of chasing quick fixes.

How To Apply It:

1. Picture your 90-year-old self. Can they get out of a chair unassisted? Can they walk?

2. Work backwards from that image to decide what you need to be doing now.

3. Turn up consistently, even when you don't feel like it, the same as you would with regular contributions to a savings account.

4. Track your progress in some form, even informally, so you can see the compounding effect.

5. Quiet the noise of fads and quick fixes that promise shortcuts.

6. Review your habits every few months, the way you'd review an investment portfolio.

Pro Tip: Health is a decades-long compounding return, not a quarterly result.

Try This Today: Picture yourself at 90 getting out of a chair. Write one sentence about what you need to do today to make that easier.

Lesson 3: Don't Outsource Your Health Completely

What It Is: Handing your health, or your retirement fund, entirely over to someone else without understanding what's happening is a risk, you need to stay informed and involved.

Why It Matters: A doctor or trainer can help you far more effectively when you show up with information about your sleep, stress, food and movement. Jack asks every new client, "How can I help you achieve your goals?" and says most people can't answer it, a sign of how disconnected we can be from our own health. Jack also manages his own superannuation and has achieved a 33 percent return compared to the average of 5 to 10 percent, by applying the same disciplines from fitness to investing.

How To Apply It:

1. Before your next medical or training appointment, write down what's been happening with your sleep, stress, food and movement.

2. Ask questions rather than accepting advice passively.

3. Learn the basics of how your super or investments are performing, even if someone else manages them.

4. Set a reminder to check in on your health and financial accounts regularly, not just once a year.

5. Practise answering the question: "How can I help you achieve your goals?" for yourself.

Pro Tip: The more information you bring to an expert, the better help you'll get back.

Try This Today: Write down one sentence about your sleep, stress, and food from the last week, information you could hand to a doctor or trainer.

Lesson 4: Get Curious. Ask Why You Do What You Do.

What It Is: Many of our habits and beliefs come from our parents, school or social media, and we rarely stop to question whether they still serve us.

Why It Matters: Jack references Ben Rennie's book Lessons in Creativity, where Ben's parents were part of an indoor cricket association that wasn't working for them, so they simply created their own. The lesson is that nothing has to be accepted just because it's always been that way. As Jack says, "As humans we just go through life doing certain things because that's the way we've trained or that's the way our parents did it." Questioning these defaults is the first step to real personal growth.

How To Apply It:

1. Pick one daily habit and ask yourself where it actually came from.

2. Ask "why" at least three times before accepting an answer at face value.

3. Notice habits inherited from parents or school that you've never questioned.

4. If something isn't working for you, consider building your own version instead of enduring it.

5. Write down one belief you hold about health, money or relationships and interrogate where it came from.

Pro Tip: If a system isn't working for you, you're allowed to build your own.

Try This Today: Pick one habit you do automatically every day and ask yourself: why do I actually do this?

Lesson 5: Master the Basics Before Chasing the Fads

What It Is: In fitness and food, the fundamentals, pushing, squatting, getting up off the floor, walking, and cooking simple meals, will always outlast trends.

Why It Matters: It's tempting to chase the newest program or diet, but Jack notes that a guest, Cam from True Fitness, said if he could get everyone on earth to do one thing, it would be to learn how to cook. Basics in food and basics in movement build a foundation that fads can't replace. It's also worth knowing that progressing from beginner to intermediate in the gym can take two to four years, and that's completely normal.

How To Apply It:

1. Check whether you can comfortably push, squat, and get up off the floor unassisted.

2. If any of these are hard, prioritise practising them over adding complexity.

3. Learn to cook two or three simple, reliable meals from scratch.

4. Walk regularly as a baseline movement habit.

5. Give yourself permission to take two to four years to move from beginner to intermediate, don't rush the basics.

Pro Tip: Fads come and go, but the basics always outlast them.

Try This Today: Do one basic movement right now, a squat, a push-up, or getting up off the floor without using your hands.

Lesson 6: Commit Fully or Don't Start

What It Is: Half-effort in relationships, programs or goals wastes everyone's time, including your own. If you're going to do something, commit properly.

Why It Matters: Saying yes to everything out of obligation spreads you thin and dilutes your results. Jack applies this to relationships too: "I'd rather just say hell yeah to the people I want to hang out with." Learning to say no protects your energy for the things and people, that actually deserve it.

How To Apply It:

1. Review your current commitments and rate each one as a genuine "hell yeah" or not.

2. Where the answer is "hell no," plan how to step back or say no in future.

3. For the "hell yeah" commitments, decide on one concrete way to show up more fully this week.

4. Apply the same filter to relationships and social commitments, not just fitness or work goals.

5. Practise saying no to one low-priority request this week.

Pro Tip: Half-committing to everything is worse than fully committing to a few things.

Try This Today: Say no to one commitment this week that isn't a genuine "hell yeah."

The Other Lessons Worth Noting

• It's Just a Moment in Time (Lesson 7): Dark periods feel permanent when you're in them, but they pass. Jack suggests looking back at photos from 12 months ago, journaling, doing monthly reflections, and reaching out for help. "If you're going through a shit time you feel like no one cares, no one loves you, I care about you."

• The Gap Between External Success and Internal Alignment (Lesson 9): You can have the house, the car, the relationship and still feel empty. External things act as mirrors reflecting internal states. "My external success comes from internal alignment, not the other way around."

• Being Busy Is Good, When It's the Right Busy (Lesson 10): Going through the motions without direction is bad busy. Good busy is working toward things that light you up. Jack's fear: "I don't want you to wake up when you're 70 and go, oh shit, what just happened?"

Lesson 8: Listen to Your Nervous System, Not Just Your Program

What It Is: Your nervous system governs how you recover, sleep, and handle stress, and it often explains injuries and niggles better than your training program does.

Why It Matters: Jack references nervous system coach Naila Ahmed, who has appeared on the podcast twice. When you're stressed, not sleeping well, and eating poorly, then add hard training on top, something gives. Injuries often aren't caused by training itself, they come from what the nervous system is already holding. This is central to nervous system health and why recovery is about more than rest days.

How To Apply It:

1. Before blaming an injury on training, ask what else has been going on in your life.

2. Check in on your sleep quality, not just sleep quantity.

3. Reduce caffeine and alcohol intake to support nervous system regulation.

4. Move smarter, not just harder, adjust intensity based on your current stress levels.

5. Go for a walk without headphones to let your nervous system settle.

6. Try a short breathwork session, such as Andrew Huberman's five-minute breathing technique on YouTube.

Pro Tip: "Resting isn't sitting on the couch eating shit food watching Netflix for a day. That is not recovery."

Try This Today: Go for a 10-minute walk without your headphones and just notice how you feel.

Lesson 11: Build a Morning Routine That Actually Suits You

What It Is: A morning routine doesn't need to be an elaborate three-hour protocol, it just needs to ease you into the day and keep you off your phone.

Why It Matters: Jack references Jacopo's book on this idea. His own routine is simple: a glass of water, tea or coffee, and 10 to 20 minutes of red light therapy using a Luma Flex device, with no phone and no inputs. That's it. It keeps him off his phone for 30 to 60 minutes each morning. The right routine is different for everyone, an ice bath might work for one person, a walk for another.

How To Apply It:

1. Start with one simple non-negotiable, like a glass of water first thing.

2. Delay checking your phone for at least the first 20 to 30 minutes of your day.

3. Add one calming input, such as tea, coffee, or light exposure.

4. Test different options, walking, stretching, journaling, to see what actually eases you into the day.

5. Keep the routine short and simple rather than adding unnecessary steps.

6. Adjust the routine as your life changes rather than treating it as fixed.

Pro Tip: "It's just over complicated" - simple beats elaborate every time.

Try This Today: Tomorrow morning, wait 20 minutes before you touch your phone.

Lesson 12: Build Systems, Because Motivation Always Fades

What It Is: Motivation gets you started, but systems are what keep you going once the initial excitement disappears.

Why It Matters: This is one of the clearest lessons on discipline vs motivation from the whole episode. Motivation is unreliable, it comes and goes. Systems, like scheduling workouts into your calendar or parking further away to walk more, keep you moving even when motivation is nowhere to be found. Jack's approach is to ask, "How can I help you achieve your goals?" and then build systems backward from the answer.

How To Apply It:

1. While you're feeling motivated, use that energy to design a system, not just chase a goal.

2. Schedule specific actions into your calendar, such as workouts on Monday, Wednesday and Friday at 1pm.

3. Build small environmental nudges, like parking further away to walk more.

4. Attach new habits to existing ones, such as a glass of water every morning.

5. Review your systems periodically and adjust them rather than relying on willpower.

6. Ask yourself what backward steps would actually get you to your goal, then systemise those steps.

Pro Tip: "Use motivation to get started, but work on the systems rather than the goal."

Try This Today: Open your calendar right now and schedule your next workout as a fixed appointment.

Mini Case/Example

Jack's own reflections throughout the episode capture the heart of these lessons:

"If information was the missing key in our lives, there's an abundance of it. We all know that... we'd all be walking around with six packs, millions of dollars, and the happiest life ever."

"As humans we just go through life doing certain things because that's the way we've trained or that's the way our parents did it."

"My external success comes from internal alignment, not the other way around."

"Use motivation to get started, but work on the systems rather than the goal."

Quick Wins Checklist (Do These Today)

• Ask yourself if a current goal is a genuine "hell yeah" or a "hell no" and act on the answer.

• Write down one sentence about your sleep, stress and food from the past week before your next health appointment.

• Do one basic movement, a squat, push-up, or getting up off the floor unassisted.

• Take a 10-minute walk without headphones to settle your nervous system.

• Delay checking your phone for 20 minutes after waking up tomorrow.

• Schedule your next workout into your calendar as a fixed appointment.

Closing Insight

Three hundred episodes in, the biggest lesson isn't a new diet trend or training hack, it's that identity, discipline and nervous system health matter more than information ever did. Motivation will always fade, but systems, curiosity, and honest self-assessment keep you moving forward. Health and wealth both compound quietly over years, rewarding those who simply keep turning up. The gap between external success and internal alignment closes only when you do the uncomfortable internal work first. None of this requires perfection, just consistency, a willingness to ask why, and the basics done well. If episode 300 proves anything, it's that the simplest lessons, repeated and applied, are the ones that actually change a life.

🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts.

Watch me on YouTube

https://youtu.be/uJgd04GOxsw 

Listen to the True From Podcast:

Apple Podcast -

https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/the-true-form-podcast/id1593804496

Spotify -

https://open.spotify.com/show/6RVH2O6MbLOCohBKPhXO0L?si=ZI8D3MnhSfSjnohSXYN_MQ

Everywhere els - 

https://trueform.buzzsprout.com

Sponsor: If you’re interested in trying red and near-infrared light therapy for recovery, pain, and overall health, check out Lumaflex. Use code TRUEFORM for 10% off: https://lumaflex.com.au/TRUEFORM

You Have the Right to Create: Lessons from Ben Rennie

How one author's promise to his dying mother became a handbook for reclaiming your creative confidence

Watch On YouTube

〰️

Watch On YouTube 〰️

TL;DR

• Creativity is not a talent; it is a belief that you have the right to make things in the first place.

• Fear and curiosity cannot coexist; chasing curiosity is one of the most practical tools for moving forward.

• A personal manifesto is not a motivational poster; it is a decision-making filter that keeps you honest.

• The periods of life that look the least "successful" from the outside are often the richest from the inside.

• Writing down what you want and meaning it shapes the choices and attention that make it happen.

🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts. 

Introduction

What if the thing that looked like the worst time of your life- no money, no plan, a foreign country- turned out to be the richest?

That is not a rhetorical question for Ben Rennie. It is a lived one. Ben is a designer, strategist, speaker, and author whose book Lessons in Creativity began as a deathbed promise to his mum, was deleted and rewritten from near-scratch, and ended up in the hands of women in their 50s and 60s who wrote to tell him they never knew they had the right to create.

Jack Graham had Ben on The True Form Podcast after Lessons in Creativity changed how he thinks about creativity, not just in business but in what makes a life feel like it is actually being lived. This is not an episode about art or design. It is about the quiet belief system underneath everything you do, the stories you carry from your family, and why the work that scares you is almost always the work worth doing.

If you have ever talked yourself out of starting something a business, a podcast, a book, a conversation this episode is for you.

Listen On Apple Podcast

〰️

Listen On Apple Podcast 〰️

Listen On Spotify

〰️

Listen On Spotify 〰️

Lesson 1: Creativity Is Not Art; It Is the Belief That You Have the Right to Make Things

What It Is: Most people define creativity as a skill or a talent, something you either have or you do not. Ben Rennie disagrees. To him, creativity is a belief: the belief that you have the right to start a business, write a book, make a podcast, or coach other people.

Why It Matters: If you frame creativity as a talent, only a select few qualify. If you frame it as a right, everyone qualifies. Ben references in his book that 96% of children believe they are creative. Most adults do not. Something happened between childhood and adulthood that stole that belief. The moment you reclaim it, the doorway opens.

"People think creativity is art. I believe creativity is the belief that we have the right to do art in the first place." - Ben Rennie

How To Apply It:

1. Write down one thing you have been putting off because you did not feel "qualified."

2. Ask yourself honestly: is the blocker a skills gap, or a belief gap?

3. Find one person who has done something similar and is clearly not a genius. Notice that they started anyway.

4. Give yourself explicit permission. Say it out loud if you have to: "I have the right to try this."

5. Take one small action, even just researching the first step, that treats the thing as real.

Pro Tip: You do not need to feel confident before you start. Confidence is a consequence of action, not a prerequisite.

Try This Today: Write the sentence "I have the right to _" and fill in the blank with the thing you have been deferring.

Lesson 2: Fear and Curiosity Cannot Coexist, So Choose Curiosity

What It Is: Fear and curiosity are competing forces that cannot occupy the same space at the same time. You are either really scared, which means you are not curious, or you are really curious, which means you are not scared. Creativity lives in the space between them.

Why It Matters: Most advice about overcoming fear tells you to push through it. Ben's framework is different: it does not tell you to ignore fear; it tells you to redirect your attention. When you genuinely focus on what might go right, who might show up, what you might discover, the fear does not disappear through willpower. It dissolves on its own.

"If I chase the curiosity, what I learned, fear dissipates. It actually goes away. They can't coexist." - Ben Rennie

The example he gives is real and specific: preparing a talk for Melbourne Design Week with 60 tickets to sell. His brain immediately told him it would be embarrassing, that only eight people would show. But curiosity asked a different question: what if 25 people come? Who are those people? What conversations happen after?

How To Apply It:

1. When you notice fear about a project or decision, write down exactly what you are afraid of.

2. Then write down what you are curious about in the same situation. What could go right? What could you learn?

3. Read both lists. Notice which one is longer; that is usually where your attention has been living.

4. Make a deliberate choice to act on one item from the curiosity list in the next 24 hours.

5. Check in after. Did the fear shrink when you moved toward the curiosity?

Pro Tip: Fear is not a signal to stop; it is often a signal that there is a real gap, and a real opportunity, on the other side.

Try This Today: Think of one thing you have been avoiding. Write down three things you are genuinely curious about in relation to it.

Lesson 3: "Broke" Is a Moment in Time "Poor" Is an Inherited Story

What It Is: Ben's father drew a sharp distinction between being poor and being broke. Being poor is an inherited belief that you cannot escape your circumstances. Being broke is a moment in time, temporary, survivable, and not a reflection of who you are.

Why It Matters: The stories we inherit from our families shape how we relate to risk, money, and our own potential. If the inherited story is "we don't do that sort of thing" or "people like us can't," then every creative leap feels like a violation of something fundamental. Naming the story is the first step to deciding whether you want to keep it.

"We're not poor, we're broke. Poor is this inherited belief that we can't get out of this trap. Broke is a moment in time; this too will pass." - Ben Rennie's father

How To Apply It:

1. Write down the money or creative risk stories you heard most often growing up, without judgement.

2. Ask: Are these stories still true for you today, or are they inherited defaults?

3. Separate "broke" (a current, temporary state) from "poor" (a fixed identity).

4. Identify one belief about what you "can" or "cannot" do that came from outside you. Question it.

Pro Tip: You do not have to reject where you came from to choose a different story going forward.

Lesson 4: The Richest Periods of Life Rarely Look Rich from the Outside

What It Is: Ben left a $1M consultancy, clients included Westpac, Gulf Oil, and Australia Post, because he was miserable. He took his family to Lake Tahoe for what was meant to be one month. It became three. They had almost nothing financially. He skied with the kids all day and worked with Australian clients from 2 pm. He calls it the richest period of his life.

Why It Matters: We tend to measure the quality of a period by external markers: income, title, prestige. A reviewer later dismissed the Lake Tahoe story as the indulgence of a "rich guy" who could afford to travel and snowboard with his kids. Ben's response: they had nothing. It was foraging.

"This period of my life was the richest I've ever been." - Ben Rennie

How To Apply It:

1. Think back to a period that looked unremarkable or even like a failure from the outside. What was actually going on inside it?

2. Identify what made it rich, presence, freedom, connection, clarity.

3. Ask yourself: where are you currently trading presence for appearance?

4. Find one place in your life right now where you can add presence without overhauling everything.

Pro Tip: The work that scares you is often the work that makes you most present. Presence does not require financial security.

Lesson 5: A Personal Manifesto Is a Decision-Making Tool, Not a Motivational Poster

What It Is: A personal manifesto or value statement is a short, written list of what you stand for and will not compromise on. Ben wrote his about four years ago: seven things. When an opportunity does not align with it, he does not take it.

Why It Matters: Without a written value statement, decisions get made by default, by urgency, flattery, or whoever is in the room. A manifesto is a pre-commitment device: what you agreed with yourself in a clear moment, before the pressure arrived. It is also what you return to when something goes badly and ask honestly, did my values actually align with this?

Ben tells the story of an organisation that had spent $100,000 on workshops trying to find their manifesto. He sat with them at a coffee shop, listened, and wrote it on a napkin. Three points were agreed on immediately. They workshopped the other two. Done.

How To Apply It:

1. Set aside 30 minutes somewhere quiet.

2. Write down five to seven things you know, without doubt, that you care about, as a professional and as a person.

3. Write each as a single sentence clear enough that someone else could understand it.

4. Test it against a recent decision. If it does not align, ask why.

5. Keep it somewhere visible as a reference, not decoration.

6. Review it every six months.

Pro Tip: The clearest sign your manifesto is working is when you say no to something that would have previously felt hard to decline.

Try This Today: Write three values you hold with certainty, honest ones, not aspirational ones.

Lesson 6: Intention Sets the Direction, Even Before You Have a Plan

What It Is: Execution starts with intention, a clear sense of why you are doing something and what you want your life to look like as a result. Ben's vision board from 18 months ago listed three things: sit on paid advisory boards, write another book, lecture at a university. He now lectures at UNSW. It arrived because the intention shaped his choices and attention.

Why It Matters: Most people wait for a plan before they set an intention. Ben reverses the order. You set the intention first, clearly, specifically, written down, and the intention begins to filter what you notice, what you say yes to, and who you end up talking to.

"The intention alone is the thing that creates the momentum to continue." - Ben Rennie

How To Apply It:

1. Write down three specific things you want your life or work to include in the next 12-18 months. Be concrete, not "be successful" but "lecture at a university" or "sign two advisory roles."

2. Put them somewhere you see regularly.

3. When an opportunity comes up, ask: does this move me toward one of those three things?

4. Start something related to one of them this week: a conversation, a draft, an email.

Pro Tip: Intentions work because they shape attention, not because they are wishes. You still have to act; the difference is that your action has a direction.

Mini Case: The Daughter Who Wrote It on Her Vision Board

Ben's daughter wrote on her vision board that she wanted to present a major sporting event and be an anchor. In her early twenties, she went on to present for Channel Nine's Wide World of Sports alongside Mark Taylor and Tim Horn, and covered the Olympics.

Ben's role, as he describes it, was not to make it happen for her. It was to say "you're going to get that" and mean it.

The lesson is not about talent. It is about creative confidence, the kind that comes from being raised in an environment where someone takes your ideas seriously before there is any evidence they will work.

Quick Wins Checklist (Do These Today)

• Write one sentence giving yourself explicit permission to start the thing you have been deferring.

• List three things you are curious about in relation to one project or decision you have been avoiding.

• Write down three values you hold with certainty, honest ones, not aspirational ones.

• Identify one belief about what you "can" or "cannot" do that was handed to you rather than chosen.

• Write one specific, concrete thing you want your life or work to include in the next 12-18 months.

• Tell one person about it. Saying it out loud is part of setting the intention.

Closing Insight

Ben Rennie did not set out to write a book about creativity. He set out to keep a promise to his mum. What he found in the process, in the deletion of 38,000 words, in three months at Lake Tahoe, in a DNA test that revealed a family history nobody had spoken of… was that creativity was the thread running through all of it. Not art, not design, not business strategy, but the simple, radical belief that you have the right to make something. That belief is not innate. It is cultivated by the people around you, by the stories you keep, and by the things you write down and mean. If 96% of children believe they are creative and most adults do not, something happened in between. The work, according to Ben, is going back and reclaiming it, not for the sake of a career, but for the sake of a life.

🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts.

Watch me on YouTube

https://youtu.be/UWQ81jFcyog 

Listen to the True From Podcast:

Apple Podcast -

https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/the-true-form-podcast/id1593804496

Spotify -

https://open.spotify.com/show/6RVH2O6MbLOCohBKPhXO0L?si=ZI8D3MnhSfSjnohSXYN_MQ

Everywhere els - 

https://trueform.buzzsprout.com

Sponsor: If you’re interested in trying red and near-infrared light therapy for recovery, pain, and overall health, check out Lumaflex. Use code TRUEFORM for 10% off: https://lumaflex.com.au/TRUEFORM

How Losing Everything Became the Turning Point That Changed Her Life

What one woman's journey from rock bottom to sobriety can teach high performers about addiction, balance, and finding their real purpose.

Watch On YouTube

〰️

Watch On YouTube 〰️

TL;DR

• Addiction is not just about substances, achievement, exercise, and even social media can hijack your life if left unchecked.

  • Owning your story instead of hiding from it is one of the most powerful things you can do for your health and your business.

  • A simple time audit and the habit of asking "why" repeatedly can surface what is truly driving your behaviour.

  • Scheduled rest and regular time off are not luxuries, they are tools for faster, more sustainable growth.

  • Fifteen minutes of stillness each morning, before you reach for your phone, can change the trajectory of your entire day.

  🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts. 

Introduction

What does addiction actually look like in a high-achieving woman's life? Not the version we see in movies, dramatic, obvious, easy to spot. The real version. The one where you are building a business, raising a daughter, winning pageants, and slowly drinking yourself into a crisis you cannot see coming.

Heather Simco knows that version intimately.

Heather is the founder of Sober Boss Babe, a coaching practice built specifically for high-achieving women who want to navigate business and life without leaning on alcohol. She went from a broken home in California, to homeless at seventeen, to semi-retired in Florida in her early thirties and still managed to hit rock bottom. On April 30, 2014, sitting alone in the middle of the night with no one willing to answer her calls, she finally surrendered.

What followed was not just sobriety. It was a complete rebuilding of her identity, her business, and her understanding of what balance actually means.

On this episode of The True Form Podcast, host Jack Graham Melbourne-based fitness coach and entrepreneur, sits down with Heather for an honest, wide-ranging conversation about addiction, ego, purpose, and the practical work of building a life that does not need an escape hatch. It goes well beyond alcohol. It touches on exercise addiction, achievement addiction, social media habits, and the question most high performers avoid: why am I really doing this?

If you have ever felt like you are running very fast without knowing where you are headed, this episode is worth your time.

Listen On Apple Podcast

〰️

Listen On Apple Podcast 〰️

Listen On Spotify

〰️

Listen On Spotify 〰️

Lesson 1: Addiction Is About Control, Not Just Substances

What It Is: Addiction is not limited to drugs or alcohol. At its core, it is anything that is controlling you, rather than you controlling it. That is the threshold worth paying attention to.

"It has a totally different meaning for me now because I'm in recovery of addiction. Usually it's something that is controlling you instead of you controlling it. That's that threshold, is it controlling you or you controlling it?" - Heather Simco

Why It Matters: Most people do not recognise their own addictions because they do not look like addiction. They look like dedication. A fitness professional working out six days a week looks disciplined. A business owner answering emails at midnight looks driven. But when these behaviours become unmanageable, when they start crowding out sleep, relationships, or health, the line has been crossed.

How To Apply It: Write down the top five things you spend your time on in a given week. Be honest; do not filter.Identify the one that feels most extreme or compulsive, the one you reach for automatically.Try going without it for one week. Notice how that feels.

Ask yourself: am I choosing this, or am I being pulled towards it?If removing it creates anxiety, irritability, or a sense of loss disproportionate to the situation, that is information worth sitting with.

Common Mistake: Assuming that because something is "healthy" like exercise or working hard, it cannot become a problem. The substance is less important than the pattern.

Try This Today: Pick one habitual behaviour and ask yourself honestly: "Could I stop this for five days if I wanted to?" If the honest answer is no, note it down.

Lesson 2: Same Root, Different Branch: Swapping One Crutch for Another

What It Is: When one addictive behaviour is removed, another often appears in its place. This is sometimes called cross-addiction, when one compulsive habit is replaced by another. The substance changes; the underlying need does not.

"When it's not one addiction, it becomes something else. For me as a recovery addict, it's same root, different branch." - Heather Simco

Why It Matters: People quit drinking and start over-exercising. They give up social media and take up compulsive shopping. They get sober and become addicted to anger or chaos. Without addressing what is underneath, the pattern just relocates.

How To Apply It: If you have recently stopped a habit or behaviour, pay attention to what has increased in its place.Ask yourself: what need was that behaviour meeting? Was it comfort, stimulation, a sense of control, or escape?

Find one healthy outlet that meets the same need, connection, physical release, creative expression. Do not just remove the behaviour; replace it with something constructive that gives a quick, tangible win.

Check in weekly. New patterns can develop quickly when you are not watching.

Pro Tip: As Heather puts it, give yourself "something constructive to work towards." Humans respond better to positive incentives than to restriction alone.

Try This Today: Think about a habit you have reduced or stopped in the past year. Write down what replaced it. Is the replacement healthier, or just different?

Lesson 3: Owning Your Story Is a Superpower

What It Is: Shame keeps people stuck. Owning your story, including the painful, embarrassing, or difficult parts, removes shame's power and turns your experience into something that can help others.

"I didn't realise how empowering it would be to own my own story and own my own addiction instead of being ashamed of it. Owning your own truth, as terrifying as it is, actually becomes a superpower." - Heather Simco

Why It Matters: For years, Heather hid her drinking behind success. She was more accomplished despite her addiction, which made it harder to see. When she finally stopped hiding and started owning her truth publicly, something shifted. What had been a source of shame became her greatest professional asset.

How To Apply It: Identify one part of your story, personal or professional, that you have been keeping quiet because it feels like a weakness.Write it out, just for yourself. No audience yet. Just get it on paper.

Ask: what did I learn from this experience that someone else could benefit from?

Consider sharing it with one trusted person. Notice how it feels to say it out loud. Over time, lean into that experience rather than away from it, in coaching conversations, business storytelling, or personal relationships.

Common Mistake: Waiting until you have it "all figured out" before you share. Imperfect honesty is more compelling than polished perfection.

Try This Today: Write two sentences about a hard thing you have been through. Then write one sentence about what it taught you.

Lesson 4: Ask Why Until You Hit the Real Answer

What It Is: The "why test" is a method of drilling down through surface-level motivations to find the real driver behind a behaviour, goal, or feeling. You ask why, then ask why again, until something shifts.

"I do the why test. Ask why. And then another why. Even if a clear purpose isn't necessarily there, the underlying issue, the thing that's been just underneath the surface that they may not have wanted to look at, comes to the surface." - Heather Simco

Why It Matters: Most people set goals based on what they think they should want, more clients, more money, a bigger platform. But those goals are often proxies for something deeper: safety, belonging, validation, or escape. Without identifying what is actually driving you, you can achieve every goal on your list and still feel empty.

How To Apply It: Pick a goal or a behaviour you are currently chasing.

Ask: "Why do I want this?"Take the answer and ask "why" again. Write it down.

Repeat at least five times, or until your answer surprises you. When you feel slightly annoyed or exposed by your own answer, you are getting close.Use that insight to decide whether you want to keep pursuing the goal, and whether you need to change your reason.

Pro Tip: Ego tends to live in the gap between what you say you want and what you actually feel when you get it. The why test closes that gap.

Try This Today: Pick one goal. Ask "why" five times in a row, writing down each answer. See where you land.

Lesson 5: A Time Audit Tells You the Truth About Your Life

What It Is: A time audit means honestly tracking where your time and money actually go, not where you think they go or where you wish they went. Your calendar and your bank account are your most accurate mirrors.

Why It Matters: Heather recommends Dan Martell's Buy Back Your Time as a practical guide here. The principle is straightforward: if you know what your time is worth per hour, you can quickly identify which tasks you should be delegating rather than doing yourself. This creates space, for rest, for creative thinking, for actually enjoying what you have built.

How To Apply It: For one week, track every significant block of time; work, admin, social media, commuting, household tasks.At the end of the week, review the list. Which tasks are only you able to do? Which could someone else do for less than your hourly rate?Identify one or two tasks to delegate, automate, or simply stop doing.

Use the time you recover to do something restorative, not just more productive work.

Review your bank statements with the same lens: where does your money go? Does it reflect your priorities?

Common Mistake: Using technology to save time, then immediately filling that time with more tasks. The goal is space, not efficiency for its own sake.

Try This Today: Look at your calendar from the past week. Circle every task that only you could do. Everything else is a candidate for delegation.

Lesson 6: Scheduled Rest Is a Growth Strategy

What It Is: Taking deliberate time off; holidays, long weekends, even a change of scenery; is not a reward for hard work. It is part of the work. Rest creates the distance needed to see your business clearly and think creatively.

Why It Matters: Heather and her family take a break every eight weeks, whether a weekend away or a longer trip. She calls it her "content creation vacation." Some of her best ideas come when she is away from the business, precisely because her mind is no longer in the weeds.

How To Apply It: Look at your calendar and book your next break, even if it is just two nights in a nearby town.Schedule recurring breaks every six to eight weeks. Put them in before other commitments fill those slots.When you are away, resist the urge to check in constantly. Allow your mind to wander.

Keep a notes app open for ideas. Do not force them; let them come. Return with fresh perspective rather than a longer to-do list.

Pro Tip: Stepping back from your business gives you a "bird's eye view" that is impossible to achieve when you are in it every day. Distance is a tool.

Try This Today: Open your calendar and find a Friday or Monday in the next six weeks. Block it as personal time before anything else claims it.

Mini Case Study: The Night Everything Finally Changed

By April 30, 2014, Heather Simco had built a life that looked remarkable from the outside. She had gone from a broken home and homelessness at seventeen to semi-retirement in Florida before she turned thirty-five. She had a pool, a house, a daughter, a husband who was her best friend. She had her master's degree, pageant titles, and a thriving martial arts business.

She was also drinking herself into oblivion, and everybody around her knew it.

That night, she drove home knowing she could not stop herself from picking up alcohol on the way. When she got there, her husband would not speak to her. Her daughter was done. She called around, no one answered. It was the middle of the night, and she was completely alone."No one to call but God," she says. "So I finally just surrendered and asked him to help. And that's the point at which the compulsion to drink was lifted."

Shortly after, she sent an email to a business shareholder while still hungover. It was, in her words, the worst email she could have sent. The business collapsed as a result.

From that ruin, she rebuilt, this time sober, clear-eyed, and with twelve years of hard-won insight she now uses to shorten the road for other high-achieving women.

Quick Wins Checklist: Do These in the Next 24 Hours

Morning stillness: Set your alarm fifteen minutes earlier tomorrow. When it goes off, do not touch your phone. Drink a glass of water and sit quietly.

The why test: Pick one goal or habit and ask "why" five times. Write down each answer.

Time audit start: Track every block of your time today, where it goes and for how long.

Identify one thing to remove: Name one commitment, task, or habit this week that is controlling you rather than serving you.

Book a break: Find a weekend in the next six weeks and block it before anything else fills it.

Acknowledge one hard truth: Write two sentences about something you have been running from. Then write one sentence about what it has taught you.

Closing Insight

There is a version of high performance that looks like drive but is really avoidance; running fast, achieving constantly, staying so busy that the uncomfortable questions never catch up. Heather Simco lived that version for years, and she will be the first to tell you it leads somewhere very dark and very lonely.

What she found on the other side of rock bottom was not a motivational poster. It was practical: audit your time, ask your whys, schedule rest, own your story, and learn to respond rather than react."When I keep running towards things, I'm not happy. When I'm doing it for the sake of helping people transform their lives, the byproduct is money, but the purpose is totally different." - Heather Simco.

The rearview mirror is smaller for a reason. The work is not in looking back, it is in slowing down long enough to figure out where you actually want to go.

To learn more about Heather Simco and her coaching community, visit heathersimco.com.

🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts.

Watch me on YouTube

https://youtu.be/ZO4cwc3LONI

Listen to the True From Podcast:

Apple Podcast -

https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/the-true-form-podcast/id1593804496

Spotify -

https://open.spotify.com/show/6RVH2O6MbLOCohBKPhXO0L?si=ZI8D3MnhSfSjnohSXYN_MQ

Everywhere els - 

https://trueform.buzzsprout.com

Sponsor: If you’re interested in trying red and near-infrared light therapy for recovery, pain, and overall health, check out Lumaflex. Use code TRUEFORM for 10% off: https://lumaflex.com.au/TRUEFORM

He Quit Cooking at 50 and Ran 8 Marathons at 67

What a 16-year raw food experiment with zero medications and zero chronic disease, can teach the rest of us about energy, ageing well, and listening to our bodies.

Watch On YouTube

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Watch On YouTube 〰️

TL;DR

• Axay Shah switched to 100% raw, plant-based food at age 50 and has the medical records to prove it works, zero medications, zero chronic disease, and eight marathons completed at 67.

  • Cooked food was once an evolutionary advantage; today it may be draining us of the very energy we need to live well.

  • Energy is a biological currency; when your body has enough, every system thrives; when it doesn't, everything rations.

  • You don't need to overhaul your diet overnight. Starting with 20-25% raw food and building slowly is a proven, sustainable approach.

  • Your body sends signals constantly. Learning to read them, rather than mask them, is the most practical health habit you can build.

  🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts. 

Introduction

Imagine turning 50, feeling fine by most people's standards, and deciding that "fine" isn't good enough. No dramatic health scare. No doctor's ultimatum. Just a quiet observation that something, energy, vitality, the spark of being fully alive, was slowly fading, and a refusal to accept that as normal.

That's exactly what Axay Shah did.

Now 67, Axay is the founder of Raw Foodiest and the bestselling author of In Nature We Trust: A Raw Food Manifesto for Energy, Healing and Longevity. He has lived 100% plant-based for over 16 years, backed by more than 21 years of documented medical records: no medications, no chronic disease, and eight completed marathons. He didn't arrive at this lifestyle through a health crisis or a guru's prescription. He arrived there as a self-described experimenter, a businessman who looked at his energy like a balance sheet and decided the numbers weren't adding up.

In this episode of The True Form Podcast, host Jack Graham sits down with Axay to unpack what raw food actually means, why humans are the only species confused about what to eat, and how every one of us can start reclaiming our energy today, no matter where we're starting from.

This conversation challenges a lot of what we've been told about nutrition, ageing, and the shortcuts we reach for. It's practical, grounding, and surprisingly simple.

Listen On Apple Podcast

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Listen On Apple Podcast 〰️

Listen On Spotify

〰️

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Lesson 1: Cooked Food Was a Brilliant Solution, For Half a Million Years Ago

What It Is

Cooking food was not always a problem. It was, for most of human history, a genuine evolutionary advantage that helped our species survive and grow smarter. The issue, Axay argues, is that we never updated the habit when the context changed.

Why It Matters

Understanding why we cook helps us question whether we still need to, at least in the quantities we do. As Axay explains it:

"At that time, it was good because food was in scarcity... our brain, even if a person doesn't do anything sitting on a couch, is still consuming around 20% to 25% of the energy of our body. So having those extra calories, we had an advantage over other animals."

Half a million years ago, fire and cooked food gave early humans a caloric boost that fuelled bigger brains. That was the bargain. Today, most households have a refrigerator full of food at all times, yet we're still eating as though scarcity is around the corner. The result, Axay says, is that we're running an "energy bankruptcy": consuming enormous amounts of food, absorbing relatively little of its nutritional value, and wondering why we're exhausted.

How To Apply It

1. Pause before eating and ask: Am I actually hungry, or is this a habit? Awareness of why you're eating is the first shift.

2. Notice what you eat in a day and roughly estimate how much of it is processed or cooked. You're not making changes yet — just observing.

3. Read the ingredients on one or two packaged foods you eat regularly. If the list is long and includes things you can't picture in nature, that's a useful data point.

4. Look at your energy levels two hours after different meals. Do you feel lifted or sluggish? Start building the connection between what you ate and how you feel.

5. Consider one meal this week that could be eaten raw or close to it, a handful of nuts, a piece of fruit, or a simple salad with a good dressing. No pressure, just an experiment.

Pro Tip: You don't need to believe the raw food philosophy to benefit from questioning your current eating habits. Curiosity is the only prerequisite.

Try This Today: Before your next meal, take 30 seconds to notice how hungry you actually are on a scale of one to ten. Just notice. That's the beginning of listening to your body.

Lesson 2: Energy Is Your Most Important Currency

What It Is

Axay's central idea, and perhaps the most memorable concept from this episode, is that energy is not just a nice-to-have. It is the biological equivalent of money: without enough of it, everything in your life becomes rationed.

Why It Matters

"Life is energy and energy is life."

It sounds simple, almost too simple. But Axay unpacks it in a way that reframes everything. If you don't have enough energy, your brain gets 80% of what it needs instead of 100%. Your heart keeps you breathing, but there's nothing left over for creativity, motivation, or joy. Your kidneys, lungs, and liver do the minimum. Cellular repair, the process that keeps you young, slows down.

Jack puts it plainly in the episode: "You can't improve your life without that energy... it all starts with that energy."

When you have surplus energy, on the other hand, everything changes. You get home from work and still want to go for a run. Your brain is sharp enough to start a project or learn an instrument. You show up better for the people around you.

"If you have enough energy, it means you have enough currency. Now you're not only maintaining the body, but you are actually doing over and above."

How To Apply It

1. Rate your energy at three fixed points each day: morning, midday, and evening. Use a simple 1-10 scale. Do this for one week without changing anything else.

2. Notice whether your energy dips match particular meals or habits. The mid-afternoon slump, for instance, is a common signal that something in lunch isn't serving you.

3. Ask yourself what you would do if you had 20% more energy right now. That answer tells you what's waiting on the other side of better nutrition.

4. Treat a consistent energy slump as a signal worth investigating, not a normal part of ageing or being busy.

5. Start directing food choices toward energy output, not calorie targets. The question changes from "How much should I eat?" to "What will actually fuel me?"

Pro Tip: Axay notes that at 67, he eats roughly 25% of what he used to consume, and reports 200% of the energy. The maths only makes sense when you account for absorption, not just intake.

Try This Today: Write down your energy level right now, and again two hours after your next meal. That single comparison is more informative than any calorie tracker.

Lesson 3: Start Small: The 20% Raw Experiment

What It Is

One of the most practical pieces of advice in the episode is this: you don't have to go all-in to start seeing results. Axay recommends beginning with just 20-25% raw food and increasing gradually as your body adapts and your tastes evolve.

Why It Matters

The biggest reason most people fail at dietary change is the cold-turkey approach, cutting everything at once, feeling terrible, and quitting within a fortnight. Axay's own transition took years. He started with some processed foods still in the mix, gradually replaced them one by one, and let his palate adjust naturally.

Jack echoes this in the episode: "You said as you grow into it. A lot of people might listen to this and go, I'm gonna give this a go, and then they just cut out everything and swap it all at once... to change so much is very hard."

This isn't about willpower. It's about sustainability. Change that lasts is change that's gradual enough for your habits, your gut, and your identity to catch up.

How To Apply It

1. Pick one meal per day to make mostly raw. Breakfast is often the easiest starting point; fruit, nuts, and seeds require no cooking.

2. Swap one processed ingredient for a whole food equivalent. Axay replaced a granola bar with almonds and walnuts. What's your version of that?

3. Replace a bottled sauce with a homemade alternative. Axay moved from jarred pasta sauce to a simple homemade salsa. Chopped tomato, onion, coriander, and lime juice take five minutes.

4. Keep easy raw snacks accessible, nuts in your bag or car, fruit on the bench. Convenience shapes behaviour more than intention does.

5. Every few weeks, add another 10-15% of raw food to your day. No timeline, no pressure. Just a direction.

6. Track where you feel comfortable and stay there for a while before pushing further. Axay notes that some people land at 60-70% raw and stay there, and that's a legitimate win.

Common Mistake: Trying to replicate your existing cooked meals in raw form from day one. Start instead with foods that are naturally great raw: fruit, good vegetables, nuts, seeds, and avocado.

Try This Today: Eat your next snack as a small handful of raw nuts or a piece of fruit instead of whatever you'd normally reach for.

Lesson 4: Raw Food Isn't Bland: It's a Different Kind of Flavour

What It Is

A persistent myth about raw food eating is that it means nothing but lettuce leaves and cucumber slices. Axay's actual daily eating is a lot more interesting than that, and understanding what he eats makes the lifestyle feel genuinely accessible.

Why It Matters

If you believe raw food is punishment, you won't stick to it. But Axay makes a compelling case that variety, texture, spice, and real satisfaction are all available without a stove.

"I ate sweet potato, regular potato, avocado, broccoli, whatever one vegetable I select, chop it off. Add some salsa, some chutney, black vinegar, yeast flakes, some seeds, pumpkin seeds, sunflower seeds, just throw a little bit. It is so delicious now. It is not just a bland salad."

His typical day looks something like this:

• Morning: A small red banana (when hungry) or simply green tea

• Lunch: A rotation of fruits; whatever is seasonal and available

• Afternoon snack: Mixed nuts; almonds, walnuts, cashews, kept in the car for convenience

• Evening meal: One chosen vegetable, chopped and dressed with salsa, chutney, black vinegar, nutritional yeast, and seeds

It's not a recipe book. It's a philosophy of choosing whole, unprocessed ingredients and making them genuinely enjoyable.

How To Apply It

1. Experiment with flavour without heat. Lemon juice, apple cider vinegar, fresh herbs, chilli flakes, tahini, and tamari all add depth to raw dishes without any cooking.

2. Build your evening meal around one vegetable as the hero, rather than trying to create a complex dish. Simplicity works.

3. Use seeds generously. Pumpkin seeds, sunflower seeds, and hemp seeds add texture, healthy fats, and protein to any raw meal.

4. Make a simple homemade salsa, diced tomato, red onion, fresh coriander, lime juice, salt, and keep it in the fridge to dress whatever you're eating.

5. Give your palate time. Axay notes that his tastes evolved over the years. What tastes bland today will taste rich and satisfying once processed flavours stop competing.

Pro Tip: Nutritional yeast (sometimes called "yeast flakes") is a raw-food staple that adds a savoury, almost cheesy flavour. It's also a good source of B vitamins.

Lesson 5: Monitor Yourself Like a Business Owner

What It Is

Axay's professional background as a businessman shapes how he approaches his health. He treats his body like a company: watching the numbers, noticing what's working, adjusting the strategy, and never flying blind.

Why It Matters

Most people make a dietary change and then hope for the best, with no real way of knowing whether it's working. Axay argues that monitoring, writing down sleep patterns, energy levels, digestion, and mood, is what transforms a random habit into an experiment with real results.

"You have to watch your bank balance. If you are not watching, you are going to be bankrupt very soon. So you don't know what is happening... Earlier, I used to sleep only six hours; now I'm sleeping eight hours. Whatever that difference is, you are seeing it. Write it down."

This approach also makes the process personal. Rather than following someone else's protocol, you're building an evidence base for your own body. What works for Axay may not work for you in the same proportions or the same timeline, and the only way to know is to pay attention.

How To Apply It

1. Start a simple health journal. A notes app on your phone is fine. No fancy format required.

2. Track at least three markers daily: sleep duration and quality, energy level (1-10), and digestion (comfortable or uncomfortable).

3. Note what you ate and when. You don't need to calorie-count; just a general record of meal content and timing.

4. Review your notes weekly, even for five minutes. Look for patterns: which foods leave you feeling sharp? Which leaves you foggy?

5. Adjust one variable at a time. If you change everything at once, you'll never know what made the difference.

6. Get blood work done annually and keep copies. Axay's 21-plus years of documented medical records are his proof, not just to others, but to himself.

Pro Tip: Axay pushed his doctor to check B12 and D3 levels, markers that are often overlooked in standard blood panels. If you're increasing plant-based eating, ask specifically for these.

Try This Today: Open your phone's notes app and write down today's date, your energy level right now, and how you slept last night. That's your first entry.

Lesson 6: Listen to Your Body, It's Been Talking the Whole Time

What It Is

The most practical tip Axay offers, and his answer to Jack's closing question about the one thing every person on Earth should do, is deceptively simple: start listening to your body. Not just noticing sensations, but actively investigating what they mean.

Why It Matters

We are conditioned to suppress signals. Headache? Take a painkiller. Tired? Have another coffee. Bloated? Ignore it and keep going. But Axay argues that every signal is data, and every time we dismiss that data, we're wasting the most sophisticated diagnostic tool we have access to, our own body.

"Our body has a lot of sensors. It gives you signals. But we are habituated to neglect it... A headache tells you something is wrong. Now, listening to your body means contemplating what happened. Why do I have a headache? Is it dehydration? Lack of food? Stress? Lack of sleep? There can be many, many reasons. But when you listen to your body, you have to figure out what the reason was."

He uses a striking metaphor: your body is like a loyal dog. Treat it well, and it will take care of you. Ignore it, and it stops trying to communicate.

"Your dog, if you don't treat your dog well, your dog is not going to treat you well. It is that simple. You treat your body well, your body is going to treat you good."

How To Apply It

1. When you notice a recurring symptom, fatigue, bloating, headaches, or brain fog, resist the urge to suppress it immediately. Pause and ask: What might this signal be telling me?

2. Keep a simple log of symptoms alongside your food and sleep data. Patterns often emerge within two to three weeks.

3. Before reaching for a pain reliever for a headache, consider whether you've had enough water, food, fresh air, or sleep first.

4. Pay attention to how your body feels after meals, not just during them. Discomfort two hours after eating is information.

5. When something feels off, research possible causes before assuming it's "just ageing" or "just stress." You are the expert on your own body; the goal is to become a better one.

Common Mistake: Assuming that feeling tired, sluggish, or unwell after eating is normal. It's common, but it's not normal, and it's worth investigating.

Mini Case: The Nephew Who Changed His Mind

When Axay started his raw food experiment in 2009, his nephew, a medical valedictorian on a seven-year scholarship, bombarded him with articles warning him to stop. His sister, six years his senior, worried he'd fall ill.

Axay's response? He read the articles, acknowledged the concern, and kept going anyway, with a simple rule: if he got sick, he'd stop.

He never got sick. He never went to a doctor for a food-related illness.

Years later, that same nephew, now a practising oncologist, told his uncle to keep doing exactly what he was doing. His sister's response: "I wish I could do what you are doing."

The lesson isn't that sceptics are always wrong. It's that long-term, first-hand evidence is worth something, and that a 16-year self-experiment with documented medical records is a meaningful data set, regardless of whether it fits neatly into a randomised controlled trial.

Quick Wins Checklist: What to Do in the Next 24 Hours

• Track your energy at three points today, morning, midday, and evening, using a simple 1–10 rating.

• Eat one snack raw: a piece of fruit, a handful of mixed nuts, or a few slices of avocado.

• Swap one processed ingredient in today's meals for a whole food alternative (bottled dressing for lemon juice and olive oil, for example).

• Start a one-page health journal entry: today's date, sleep quality, energy level, and what you ate. Just one page.

• Drink a glass of water the next time you feel a headache or energy dip, and wait 15 minutes before reaching for anything else.

• Look up your most recent blood work results and check whether B12 and D3 were included. If not, make a note to ask at your next appointment.

Closing Insight

What Axay Shah's story offers is not a strict prescription; it's a permission slip. Permission to question what you've always done. Permission to treat your own body as a credible source of information. Permission to start slowly, build gradually, and measure what's actually happening rather than guessing.

The idea that energy is a currency reframes everything. It shifts the question from "Am I eating healthily?" to "Am I producing enough energy to live the life I actually want?" That's a more honest question, and it leads to more honest answers.

You don't need to quit cooking tonight. You don't need to run a marathon. You need to start paying attention to the food on your plate, the way you feel after eating it, the signals your body sends, and what those signals are actually trying to tell you.

As Axay puts it, life is energy, and energy is life. Everything else follows from there.

🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts.

Watch me on YouTube

https://youtu.be/c1wyb-FE8yM 

Listen to the True From Podcast:

Apple Podcast -

https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/the-true-form-podcast/id1593804496

Spotify -

https://open.spotify.com/show/6RVH2O6MbLOCohBKPhXO0L?si=ZI8D3MnhSfSjnohSXYN_MQ

Everywhere els - 

https://trueform.buzzsprout.com

Sponsor: If you’re interested in trying red and near-infrared light therapy for recovery, pain, and overall health, check out Lumaflex. Use code TRUEFORM for 10% off: https://lumaflex.com.au/TRUEFORM

From Losing Your “Old Life” to Finding Your Power: Grit, Gratitude & Growth

How to move through grief, anxiety and big life changes without losing yourself.

Watch On YouTube

〰️

Watch On YouTube 〰️

TL;DR

• Grief isn’t something you “get over” it’s something you learn to live with while you keep moving forward.

• Grit is not “sucking it up”; it’s acknowledging that something is hard and choosing to act anyway.

• Gratitude isn’t toxic positivity; it’s noticing what helps you get through the day, especially in tough seasons.

• Self‑compassion and intuition are practical tools that help you build real confidence and stop chasing outside validation.

• You don’t need perfection to change your life or your health, you just need to show up and try, one small step at a time.

  🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts. 

Introduction

Imagine being a teenager, already dealing with all the usual hormones, friendships and school pressure and at the same time, losing your sight.

That was reality for Laura Bratton. Diagnosed with an eye disease at nine, she slowly went blind over the next decade. By the time she finished high school, she had very limited light perception and no usable vision. Alongside that came deep grief, panic attacks and heavy medication that left her feeling like “a zombie walking around.”

Today, Laura is a grief counsellor, keynote speaker, author of Harnessing Courage and founder of Ubi Global, where she helps people navigate change using two deceptively simple tools: grit and gratitude.

In our conversation on The True Form Podcast, we went deep into what those words actually mean when life falls apart, whether that’s losing a loved one, going through a breakup, facing a health diagnosis, or just feeling like you don’t fit in. We connected her story to everyday challenges like gym anxiety, perfectionism around training and the pressure to “get over it” quickly and move on.

This article pulls out the most practical lessons from that chat, so you can apply them in your own life not as fluffy mindset quotes, but as concrete steps you can take today.

Listen On Apple Podcast

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Listen On Apple Podcast 〰️

Listen On Spotify

〰️

Listen On Spotify 〰️

Lesson 1: Give Yourself Permission to Grieve

What It Is:
Permission to grieve means allowing yourself to feel the full weight of your loss, without rushing to “get over it” or judging your emotions as weakness.

Why It Matters:
Most of us have absorbed the idea that grief should last a few weeks and then be done. Laura shared how this belief made her think there was something “wrong” with her because she was still deeply grieving both her blindness and the teenage experiences she was missing. When you don’t give yourself permission to grieve, your pain doesn’t disappear, it just goes underground and leaks out as anxiety, numbness or burnout. Letting yourself grieve is what actually allows that pain to slowly move through you.

How To Apply It:

1. Name the loss honestly. Write down or say out loud what you’re grieving: a person, a relationship, your health, a version of your life you hoped for.

2. Drop the timeline. Notice any “I should be over this by now” thoughts and gently label them as unhelpful stories, not facts.

3. Validate your feelings. Instead of “I shouldn’t be this upset”, try “Of course I feel this way, this really matters to me.”

4. Make space for emotions. Set aside a small, safe window (even 5-10 minutes) where you let yourself cry, feel angry, or admit how scared you are.

5. Avoid comparison. Don’t measure your grief against how you think others would handle it. Your experience is your own.

Pro Tip:
Grief is not a character flaw, it’s a normal response to losing something important. Treat it like weather passing through, not a personal failure.

Try This Today:
Finish this sentence in a notebook or phone note: “Right now, I give myself permission to grieve the loss of , and it makes sense that this hurts because .”

Lesson 2: Sit With Your Pain, But Don’t Sit in It Alone

What It Is:
“Turning towards” your pain means consciously feeling difficult emotions instead of numbing or running from them, while letting other people, or even nature or art, help hold the weight.

Why It Matters:
Laura described years of panic attacks and depression so intense she could barely function, heavily medicated and constantly overwhelmed. One of the key shifts was learning to face her pain instead of trying to deny it, and to lean on support so it didn’t feel too big to handle. When you try to go into deep grief completely alone, it can feel terrifying. Shared, it becomes bearable and slowly starts to move.

How To Apply It:

1. Choose your “containers.” Decide where you feel safest feeling big emotions, with a close friend, in therapy, on a walk in nature, journalling, or through music/art.

2. Signal your need clearly. Tell someone you trust, “I’m not looking for advice, I just need you to listen while I get this out.”

3. Let someone else “hold” it. Talk, draw, cry or sit quietly. Imagine the other person, or the environment, holding the emotion with you.

4. If you’re the supporter, listen. Resist the urge to fix. Laura’s advice: listen, validate, and say things like, “I can’t imagine how hard that was,” instead of handing over a to‑do list.

5. Set a gentle boundary. After a while, close the ritual: “That’s enough for today. I’ve honoured what I’m feeling, and now I’ll focus on the next small thing I can do.”

Pro Tip:
If you feel useless listening to someone’s pain, remember Laura’s line: “Listening is enough.” Trying to fix everything often just adds pressure.

Try This Today:
Text a trusted friend: “Hey, I’m going through something and could use 10 minutes of you just listening, no advice needed. Are you up for that this week?”

Lesson 3: Practise Self‑Compassion Like You Would for a Best Mate

What It Is:
Self‑compassion is treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding you’d offer a close friend who is struggling.

Why It Matters:
When people told Jack to “just get over” his breakup, it minimised his pain and made him feel like he should be tougher. Laura pointed out that we’d never speak to a friend like that, we’d offer support at 3am and cheer when they met someone new. Self‑compassion isn’t self‑pity. It’s acknowledging, “This is hard, and I’m going to love myself enough to figure out how to move forward.” That mindset makes it far more likely you’ll actually heal and take healthy action.

How To Apply It:

1. Notice your inner voice. When you’re struggling, write down what you’re saying to yourself. Would you say that to a friend?

2. Rewrite the script. Turn “Suck it up, get over it” into “This is really hard for me, and that makes sense. I’m here for myself while I work through it.”

3. Use the best‑friend test. Before you talk to yourself harshly, ask, “What would I say to my best mate in this situation?” Say that to yourself instead.

4. Allow both pain and progress. Give yourself permission to cry at 3am and to be excited when something new or good appears. Both can be true.

5. Normalise discomfort. Recognise that feeling scared or sad doesn’t mean you’re failing, it means you’re human and you care.

Pro Tip:
If “self‑compassion” sounds too fluffy, swap it for acknowledge. As Laura said, “If I could sum up self‑compassion in one word, it’s acknowledge.”

Try This Today:
Write one self‑compassion sentence about something current: “This situation is tough because , and I’m allowed to find it hard while I work out my next step.”

Lesson 4: Redefine Grit, It’s Not “Get Over It”

What It Is:
Grit, in Laura’s framework, is acknowledging that something is hard, scary or painful, and still choosing to take the next step. It is not suppressing feelings or pretending everything is fine.

Why It Matters:
Many of us think resilience means “suck it up, swallow your emotions and push on.” Laura rejects that. For her, grit is sending the scary work email even while your heart is racing, or walking into the gym even though you’re anxious. She still felt anxious after pressing send on that email, but the point is, she did it. Waiting until you feel nothing before you act means you may never act at all.

How To Apply It:

1. Identify the next tiny step. Instead of “fix my whole life,” ask, “What’s the next 30‑second action I can take?” e.g. put shoes on, open the email draft, book the appointment.

2. Acknowledge your fear. Say, “I’m anxious and I’m doing this anyway,” rather than “I’m not scared.” Both truth and action can coexist.

3. Lower the bar to ‘trying’. Laura’s coach told her, “It’s not about perfection, it’s about progress.” Execution equals trying, not nailing it.

4. Detach from outcomes. See each action as practice, not a test. Whether the email lands perfectly or not, you’re building the “I can do hard things” muscle.

5. Celebrate effort, not perfection. At the end of the day, ask, “Where did I show grit today?” even if the step was tiny.

Pro Tip:
If you’re waiting for fear to disappear before you act, you’re mixing up grit with numbness. Grit is action with feeling, not without it.

Try This Today:
Pick one thing you’ve been avoiding (a message, a booking, a gym visit). Set a timer for 2 minutes and take just the first step, write the message, open the booking page, or stand at the gym door. That counts.

Lesson 5: Practise Real Gratitude (Not Toxic Positivity)

What It Is:
Gratitude, as Laura uses it, is noticing and appreciating what helps you get through life, especially through hard days. It is not saying “be grateful and get over it” or pretending your pain doesn’t exist.

Why It Matters:
When people told Laura to be grateful and move on from her blindness, it minimised the reality that she still lives every day in a sighted world without sight. Her gratitude isn’t “I’m so glad I’m blind”; it’s “I’m thankful for my guide dog who helped me navigate safely today.” This kind of gratitude becomes a source of grounding and strength, not a way to silence emotions.

How To Apply It:

1. Keep grief and gratitude separate. Allow yourself to say, “This is really hard” and “I’m grateful for what’s helping me through.” Both can be true.

2. Focus on supports, not silver linings. Notice people, tools, environments or habits that make your day a bit more bearable.

3. Integrate it into your evening. Laura suggests a simple cue: as you wind down, think of three things you’re grateful for from that day. No journal required.

4. Use reminders. Set a phone reminder labelled “Gratitude” or put a sticky note on your mirror so you don’t forget.

5. Start small and specific. “My friend picked up the phone,” “The walk cleared my head,” “My body got me through the day.”

Pro Tip:
If gratitude feels fake, you’re probably trying to use it to erase pain. Use it to support you in the pain, not to override it.

Try This Today:
Tonight, while brushing your teeth, name three things that helped you get through the day, out loud or in your head. Keep it simple.

Lesson 6: Trust Your Intuition and Believe You Are Enough

What It Is:
Intuition is your deeper sense of what’s really going on beneath appearances, in yourself and in others. Believing “I am enough” is choosing to start from a place of worth, rather than constantly chasing external proof through bodies, likes or achievements.

Why It Matters:
Losing her sight forced Laura to rely less on visual cues and more on tone, energy and words. She’ll talk to someone who looks put‑together, expensive clothes and all the latest tech, yet hears deep panic underneath. She also sees how people chase supplements, face creams and extreme programs to feel “enough”. When you start from “I am enough,” you still pursue growth, like training and eating well, but from grounded self‑respect rather than desperation.

How To Apply It:

1. Pause before you buy or commit. Ask, “Am I doing this because I feel not enough, or because I already value myself and want to take care of me?”

2. Listen beyond appearances. When you encounter “perfect” bodies or flashy success online, pay attention to the actual words and energy. Do they feel grounded or anxious and sales‑driven?

3. Check in with your body. Notice how your body feels around certain people, content or offers: relaxed, tight, rushed, pressured? That bodily sense is information.

4. Affirm your ‘enoughness’. Daily, remind yourself: “I am enough because I am me. I can still grow, but my worth isn’t on the line.”

5. Choose growth from love, not fear. Exercise, eat well and build habits because you care about yourself, not because you’re trying to fix something broken.

Pro Tip:
If a trainer or influencer makes you feel panicked, ashamed or rushed into buying, take that as a sign your intuition is picking up misalignment. Step back.

Try This Today:
Before your next health choice (workout, food, purchase), ask: “If I already believed I was enough, what would I choose right now?”

Mini Case/Example

“The honest answer is pure survival. What put me in that pure survival was going through teenage years and also losing my sight at the exact same time.” - Laura Bratton

“Grit is acknowledging that hard and still choosing to move forward.” - Laura Bratton

“You would not say to your best friend, ‘Get over it, suck it up, move on’, but that’s exactly what we say to ourselves.” - Laura Bratton

These moments from the episode capture the heart of Laura’s message: your hardest seasons don’t have to turn into motivational posters to matter. They just have to be lived through, one honest, gritty, compassionate step at a time.

Quick Wins Checklist (Do These Today)

• Write down one thing you’re grieving right now and give yourself explicit permission to feel it.

• Tell one trusted person, “I don’t need fixing, I’d just love you to listen for 10 minutes.”

• When you catch harsh self‑talk, pause and rewrite it as if you were speaking to your best mate.

• Take one gritty action you’ve been avoiding, send the email, message the coach, or walk into the gym even if you only stay five minutes.

• Before bed, name three things that helped you get through the day, no matter how small.

• Ask yourself: “If I already believed I was enough, what’s one small way I’d look after myself today?”

Closing Insight

Grit and gratitude sound like big, inspiring words. In Laura Bratton’s story, they’re not abstract at all, they’re the everyday tools that helped her get through panic attacks, deep grief and the shock of losing her sight while the world expected her to bounce back quickly.

You don’t have to face something as dramatic as blindness for these ideas to matter. They apply just as much to a breakup, a stalled career, a health scare or the simple fear of walking into the gym for the first time. Every time you acknowledge your pain instead of minimising it, choose a small action in the presence of fear, or notice one thing that helped you today, you’re practising the same muscles Laura uses.

Change rarely comes from one heroic moment. It comes from hundreds of quiet choices to be honest, to be kind to yourself and to keep moving – even when your hands are shaking.

You are allowed to grieve and grow at the same time. And you are more capable, and more “enough”, than your harshest thoughts would have you believe.

Listen to the full episode: From Losing Her Sight to Finding Her Power: Grit, Gratitude & Growth with Laura Bratton

🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts.

Watch me on YouTube

https://youtu.be/vZGc2acb8cw 

Listen to the True From Podcast:

Apple Podcast -

https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/the-true-form-podcast/id1593804496

Spotify -

https://open.spotify.com/show/6RVH2O6MbLOCohBKPhXO0L?si=ZI8D3MnhSfSjnohSXYN_MQ

Everywhere els - 

https://trueform.buzzsprout.com

Sponsor: If you’re interested in trying red and near-infrared light therapy for recovery, pain, and overall health, check out Lumaflex. Use code TRUEFORM for 10% off: https://lumaflex.com.au/TRUEFORM

The Biohacker’s Guide to Spiritual Bodybuilding

How Nahum Vizakis blends muscle, mind and plant medicine to build true strength

Watch On YouTube

〰️

Watch On YouTube 〰️

TL;DR

• Why chasing aesthetics and external validation leaves so many lifters burnt out, injured and empty.

• How to balance “contraction” (hard training, structure) with “expansion” (rest, introspection, nervous system work).

• A practical six‑month reset framework you can adapt without extreme plant medicine work.

• How identity, ego and attachment quietly drive your training, career and relationships – and how to evolve instead of self‑sabotage.

• Simple tools (breathwork, journalling, nature, honest reflection) to start “spiritual bodybuilding” today.

🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts. 

Introduction

What happens when a jacked, medal‑winning bodybuilder, who used to defuse bombs in Iraq, realises that all his muscle and discipline still haven’t brought him peace?

That’s the story of Nahum Vizakis; athlete, former U.S. Army Explosive Ordnance Disposal (EOD) operator, fascial stretch therapist, astrologer, healer and author of The Biohacker’s Guide to Spiritual Bodybuilding and The Indigo Flame. In this episode, we dive into how his life blew apart (sometimes literally), and how he rebuilt himself from the inside out using bodybuilding, plant medicine, nervous system work and radical honesty.

From the outside, Nahum was the perfect “fitness success story”: shredded on stage, obsessed with his pro card, pushing performance‑enhancing drugs and training volume as far as they would go. On the inside, he was dealing with PTSD, 16 prescription medications at one stage, identity crises and a nervous system stuck in fight‑or‑flight. His turning points came through a mix of breakdowns and breakthrough, from a violent somato‑emotional release on a massage table to surrendering for the first time in an ayahuasca ceremony.

In our conversation, we explore what he calls “spiritual bodybuilding”: using training, biohacking and plant medicine as tools not just for aesthetics, but for consciousness, healing and purpose. If you’ve ever chased numbers or aesthetics, only to feel flat and lost once you “get there”, this is for you.

Listen On Apple Podcast

〰️

Listen On Apple Podcast 〰️

Listen On Spotify

〰️

Listen On Spotify 〰️

Lesson 1: Stop Chasing Aesthetics – Train for Alignment and Longevity

What It Is:
Spiritual bodybuilding is the shift from training only for looks or external validation to training as a way to align your body, mind and spirit over the long term.

Why It Matters:
Many people in gyms and competitive sports are running on the same script: more volume, more restriction, more stimulants, more gear. Nahum shares how this mindset took him to 255 pounds, sleep apnoea, constant anger and a 33rd‑place finish after years of sacrifice. The body looked “elite”, but his health, relationships and inner world were crumbling. When we only chase aesthetics, we often ignore our nervous system, emotions and purpose, and that’s where burnout and self‑sabotage creep in.

How To Apply It:

1. Audit your “why” for training. Write down why you train today. If the reasons are all external (looks, likes, proving someone wrong), add at least one internal reason (energy, calm, presence, resilience).

2. Check your health non‑negotiables. Ask: am I sleeping well, digesting food, recovering, and generally happy, or am I wrecked but shredded? If basic health is poor, looks are costing you too much.

3. Shift from outcome to process. Instead of “I must hit X weight or body fat,” focus on “I show up 4 days a week, move well, and leave feeling better than I arrived.”

4. Include one “expansion” session a week. Swap one brutal session for yoga, mobility, a long walk or breathwork to balance your nervous system.

5. Use feedback from your body. Track mood, libido, sleep and joint pain alongside your lifts and metrics. Treat them as equal data points.

Pro Tip:
If you “win” (PB, comp, physique) and feel nothing, that’s a sign it’s time to shift from validation to alignment.

Try This Today:
After your next session, rate it out of 10 not on pump or load, but on “Do I feel more or less like myself right now?”

Lesson 2: Balance Contraction and Expansion in Training and Life

What It Is:
Contraction is the push: heavy lifting, grinding, structure, discipline, doing more. Expansion is the softening: rest, introspection, breath, nervous system down‑regulation, connection. Nahum argues that bodybuilding culture is stuck in contraction, while some spiritual circles are stuck in expansion, and we need both.

Why It Matters:
Too much contraction leads to injury, anxiety, emotional shutdown and addiction to intensity. Too much expansion can lead to passivity, lack of structure and never following through. Nahum found his sweet spot by blending fascial stretching, breathwork, plant medicine and biohacking with targeted bodybuilding, and by deliberately stepping back every six months to reset. That rhythm kept him in the game at 47 without repeating the same destructive loops.

How To Apply It:

1. Map your default mode. Are you a “go hard or go home” person, or a “floaty and reflective but struggle to execute” person? Be honest.

2. Pair every push with a release. Heavy lower‑body day? Add 10-15 minutes of stretching or breathwork after. Big work week? Book a quiet weekend walk instead of another social bender.

3. Schedule mini off‑seasons. You may not do Nahum’s full plant‑medicine reset, but you can schedule 1-2 lighter weeks every 8-12 weeks where you reduce load, caffeine and external noise.

4. Use breath as a bridge. After a stressful session or day, do 3-5 minutes of slow nasal breathing (in for 4, out for 6-8) to tell your nervous system it’s safe.

5. Track your nervous system, not just your workouts. Notice if you’re stuck in fight‑or‑flight: racing thoughts, shallow breathing, constant urgency. That’s your cue to add expansion.

Pro Tip:
If you can’t stand the idea of taking a lighter week, that’s exactly when you need one. Resistance is data.

Try This Today:
Do 10 slow, deep breaths lying on the floor after your next training session. Focus on relaxing your jaw and belly on every exhale.

Lesson 3: Use a Regular Reset to Break Old Patterns

What It Is:
Every six months, Nahum runs a full “reset” stepping away from normal life to detox his body, calm his nervous system and re‑align his direction for the next chapter. His version includes frog medicine (kambo), ayahuasca, fasting, breathwork, nature and re‑building training slowly.

Why It Matters:
Patterns build silently. Over six months, you can drift into more stimulants, more gear, more scrolling, less sleep, more reactivity. Without a circuit‑breaker, you wake up burnt out or injured and call it “out of nowhere”. A planned reset interrupts that spiral. You don’t need to fly to the jungle or use plant medicines to get the benefits, the principle is stepping back on purpose, before your body forces you to.

How To Apply It (No Plant Medicine Required):

1. Pick a reset window now. Choose 3-7 days in the next 3-6 months where you can minimise work, social commitments and training load. Block it out like a holiday.

2. Simplify inputs. During that window, reduce stimulants (less caffeine/pre‑workout), alcohol and ultra‑processed food. Aim for basic whole foods and plenty of water.

3. Move gently, not zero. Swap heavy training for walking, light mobility, yoga or easy cycling to keep the body moving without smashing your CNS.

4. Daily introspection. Spend 20-30 minutes each day journalling or sitting quietly, asking: Where am I out of alignment? What am I forcing? What am I avoiding?

5. Design your next six months. At the end, choose 2-3 focus areas (e.g. sleep, knee rehab, starting a new project) and sketch a simple structure to support them.

6. Set safeguards. Like Nahum, surround yourself with 1-2 people who will call you out when you drift back into self‑destructive extremes.

Pro Tip:
A reset isn’t “quitting training” it’s changing gears so you don’t blow the engine.

Try This Today:
Open your calendar and block out a 3‑day “reset” in the next few months. Treat it like a non‑negotiable appointment with your future self.

Lesson 4: Heal Stored Emotion and Fascia, Not Just Muscles

What It Is:
Somato‑emotional release is when stored tension and emotion in the body finally discharge, often through movement, shaking, crying or unusual sensations. Nahum’s first big one happened when a classmate in massage school gently pressed at the base of his skull, he ended up flopping around like a fish for two hours while years of suppressed survival mode left his body.

Why It Matters:
Many high‑performers and lifters live with a nervous system stuck in “on”. Years of bracing, grinding and “just pushing through” can lock trauma and stress into fascial tissue. Nahum realised he’d been sympathetic dominant for decades, on Adderall, pre‑workout, Ambien, steroids, with no idea how to down‑regulate. When that tension finally released, his food preferences, training desires, relationships and sense of self shifted overnight. You don’t need an extreme episode to benefit from soft tissue and nervous system work; small, consistent practices can slowly unstick that tension.

How To Apply It:

1. Add fascia‑friendly movement. Include stretching, gentle mobility or yoga 2-3 times a week, focusing on slow, relaxed breathing rather than forcing range.

2. Explore bodywork. If it’s available and safe for you, try massage, myofascial release or other hands‑on therapies with practitioners who understand stress and trauma. (Note: Specific modalities beyond massage and fascial work are not fully detailed in the episode.)

3. Notice emotional spikes in training. If a simple cue or setback makes you irrationally angry or shut down, that may be stored stuff, not just “today’s mood”.

4. Pair release with integration. After a big cry, shake, or intense bodywork session, give yourself time to rest, hydrate and journal. Don’t just rush straight back to max‑effort training or work.

5. Be patient with identity shifts. After his release, Nahum suddenly didn’t want to lift heavy, eat the same foods or stay in the same relationship – and that was confronting. Expect some internal reshuffling.

Pro Tip:
If you always respond to pain or discomfort by adding more tension (clenching, holding your breath), you’re reinforcing the pattern you’re trying to heal.

Try This Today:
Spend 3–5 minutes lying on the floor with a rolled towel under your upper back, breathing slowly and noticing any sensations, without trying to “fix” them.

Lesson 5: Evolve Your Identity Instead of Clinging to Old Labels

What It Is:
Identity is the story you tell yourself about who you are: “I’m a bodybuilder”, “I’m a CrossFitter”, “I’m Jack the PT”. Nahum describes his life as a series of chapters, soldier, bodybuilder, healer, author, each with an apex, a fall, a learning phase and a reintegration. The key is to see each phase as evolution, not failure.

Why It Matters:
A lot of people stay stuck in painful situations because their identity is tied to them. Influencers cling to diets or training styles that are harming their health because that’s what their followers expect. Athletes keep pushing through injuries because “this is who I am”. Nahum’s wake‑up calls came when he failed to go pro, placed poorly, or realised he felt nothing after finally winning again, the self he had built no longer felt true. Letting go of those identities hurt, but it opened the door to work that felt deeper and more aligned.

How To Apply It:

1. Name your current labels. On paper, list the identities you cling to most (job, body, achievements, roles).

2. Ask what each identity costs you. For each one, write: “What do I sacrifice to keep this alive?” Sleep? Relationships? Health? Creativity?

3. Find the transferable skills. Just as Nahum carried discipline from the military into bodybuilding, and empathy from healing into authorship, identify which qualities you can take into your next chapter.

4. Allow grief. When an identity falls away, being the strongest in the gym, the leanest on IG, the company workhorse, it’s normal to feel sad, lost or even “like a failure”. Don’t rush it.

5. Practice small acts of authenticity. Share one honest story, set one boundary, or change one habit that better reflects who you’re becoming, not who you were.

6. Trust there’s a “bigger teddy bear”. Nahum uses the image of letting go of a small teddy bear so you can receive a bigger one you can’t see yet – you often need to drop your old role before the next, better one can land.

Pro Tip:
If you only feel valuable when you’re performing at your old peak, your identity needs updating more than your program does.

Try This Today:
Finish this sentence in your journal: “The part of me I’m most scared to outgrow is…” and see what comes up.

Lesson 6: Let Faith and Stillness Reveal Your “Next Level”

What It Is:
Rather than forcing the next level through more hustle, Nahum talks about becoming a “vibrational match” for it, slowing down, listening and letting clarity arise once the noise settles. In plain language: stop trying to think your way to the next chapter and let it show up as you clean up your patterns.

Why It Matters:
You shared in the episode that after letting go of a lot of ego‑driven goals, life is good. But, the old fire and thrill of winning aren’t there in the same way, and you feel stuck on what “next level you” looks like. That’s a common place for people who’ve done some inner work. The trap is trying to recreate the old fuel (ego boosts, grind culture) instead of allowing a deeper, steadier motivation to emerge. Nahum emphasises patience: journalling, breathwork, time in nature and faith that the clear next step often appears when you’re not chasing it.

How To Apply It:

1. Stop hunting for the answer. Limit podcasts, books and “how to” content for a short period so you can hear your own thoughts again.

2. Create a stillness ritual. Even 10-15 minutes a day of sitting quietly, breathing, or journalling about what feels heavy vs what feels light can shift a lot over time.

3. Write without editing. As Nahum did when drafting his books, let yourself write freely about what you’re feeling and wanting. Come back later and notice where you sound like a victim, or where you’re still triggered, that shows you what’s not healed yet.

4. Follow one small pull. When something keeps nudging you (a project, a style of work, a person to contact), take one tiny step instead of waiting for a full blueprint.

5. Let others hold a mirror. Keep a small circle of people who will kindly call you out on your blind spots and patterns. Listen, even when it stings.

Pro Tip:
The next level rarely feels like a dopamine hit; it usually feels like a quiet, solid “of course” once you’ve cleaned up the noise.

Try This Today:
Set a 10‑minute timer, put your phone in another room, and handwrite: “If I stopped forcing it, what do I secretly want next?” Don’t judge what comes out.

Mini Case/Example

“I feel like I’ve lived five lifetimes in this life. Each chapter there’s been an apex, there’s been a fall, then there’s been a learning period, then there’s been an adaptation period to reintegrate and bring that stuff back in.” - Nahum Vizakis

At one point, Nahum was 255 pounds, chasing his pro card, running heavy gear, barely sleeping and increasingly miserable. After placing 33rd at a national show, he spiralled into depression and stepped away from bodybuilding altogether, eventually ending up in massage school.

A simple hands‑on technique at the base of his skull triggered a two‑hour somato‑emotional release in front of the whole class, followed months later by his first ayahuasca experience, where he says he felt real love in his body for the first time, and realised much of what he’d called love before was actually attachment.

Years later, he returned to the stage as a masters competitor and won. This time, he felt nothing from the victory, no high, no ego rush. That was the moment he knew the old game was over, and his work was now to help others stop chasing external validation and start building strength from within.

Quick Wins Checklist (Do These Today)

• Write down your current training “why” and add at least one deeper, internal reason to keep showing up.

• After your next session, spend 3-5 minutes on the floor doing slow nasal breathing to shift from fight‑or‑flight to calm.

• Put a 3‑day “reset” block in your calendar sometime in the next 3-6 months. Treat it like a holiday.

• Make a list of two identities you’re attached to and one skill or quality from each that you want to carry into your next chapter.

• Do a 10‑minute, distraction‑free journalling session on the prompt: “Where am I forcing something that no longer feels right?”

Closing Insight

Spiritual bodybuilding isn’t about abandoning heavy lifting, performance or aesthetics. It’s about putting them in their proper place – as tools for growth, not measures of your worth. Nahum’s story shows how easy it is to drift into extremes: more gear, more sacrifice, more noise, all in the name of “discipline”, while your nervous system and relationships quietly fall apart.

The real flex is being able to step back before you break. It’s choosing to breathe when your old self would double down, to rest when your ego wants to grind, to let an identity die so a more authentic one can be born. Spiritual bodybuilding means you can still love the iron, but you also respect your fascia, your gut, your sleep and your soul.

You don’t need plant medicine or a near‑death experience to start. A notebook, some honest reflection, a few deep breaths and a willingness to listen to your body are enough to begin. Over time, those tiny choices compound into a different kind of strength, one that doesn’t disappear when the comp is over or the algorithm moves on.

Watch me on YouTube

https://youtu.be/62MvxiaPoIk

Listen to the True From Podcast:

Apple Podcast -

https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/the-true-form-podcast/id1593804496

Spotify -

https://open.spotify.com/show/6RVH2O6MbLOCohBKPhXO0L?si=ZI8D3MnhSfSjnohSXYN_MQ

Everywhere els - 

https://trueform.buzzsprout.com

Sponsor: If you’re interested in trying red and near-infrared light therapy for recovery, pain, and overall health, check out Lumaflex. Use code TRUEFORM for 10% off: https://lumaflex.com.au/TRUEFORM

Movement is Medicine: Why Basics Beat Trends (And Keep You Pain-Free)

What an osteopath and pro bodybuilder taught me about injury, identity, and why everyone skips what actually works

Watch On YouTube

〰️

Watch On YouTube 〰️

TL;DR

• Social media has convinced us the basics are boring. But, skipping foundational movement patterns is why so many people stay injured and in pain.

• Fear of injury is keeping people from moving, when controlled movement is actually the cure.

• Strength training isn't just physical medicine, it's nervous system regulation, mental health, and identity work all at once.

• True bodybuilders are rare; most people chase the aesthetic without the discipline, and that's okay, find your own path.

• Building multiple businesses or identities isn't about doing more; it's about saying yes to yourself and no to everything else.

🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts. 

Introduction

"If I get injured, I can't do anything."

I hear this all the time as a personal trainer. People walk into consultations terrified, not of failure, not even of hard work, but of injury. They want to get fit, get strong, build muscle, feel better in their skin. But underneath it all is this paralysing fear that one wrong move will break them.

Dr Dani Antonellos sees it too. But she sees it from both sides.

Dani is an osteopath with over a decade of clinical experience treating injured athletes and everyday gym-goers. She's also a WBFF and FMG Pro Bikini Athlete who's stood on stage at the highest level of bodybuilding competition. She runs Paddo Performance, a high-performance gym in Sydney, co-founded the My Training Space app, and leads United Health Education, a global platform teaching movement-based rehabilitation to health professionals. Her mantra is simple: "Movement is Medicine."

In this episode, Dani joined me alongside co-host Naila Ahmed, a holistic therapist who specialises in nervous system regulation and childhood trauma. Together, we unpacked why everyone's chasing trends and shortcuts, why the basics aren't sexy but they work, and why most people who think they're bodybuilders aren't, and that's completely fine. This conversation went deep into pain, fear, identity, business, and what it actually takes to build a body and a life that lasts.

Listen On Apple Podcast

〰️

Listen On Apple Podcast 〰️

Listen On Spotify

〰️

Listen On Spotify 〰️

Lesson 1: The Basics Aren't Sexy, But They're the Only Thing That Works

What It Is:
The "basics" in training are foundational movement patterns; squat, hinge, lunge, push, pull, and core work. In nutrition, it's eating whole foods across all food groups and getting enough protein. The basics are boring. They don't get likes. But they're the 80% that delivers 90% of results.

Why It Matters:
Dani sees it every day: people skip the fundamentals because social media has convinced them there's a shortcut. They jump straight to advanced exercises, complicated programming, or the latest supplement trend. Then they get injured, plateau, or burn out, and wonder why nothing's working. "People are skipping the basics because they're not sexy, because they don't get likes on Instagram," Dani explained. "In most cases, if you just do the basics well and do them often, that will get you the results. But people just think, no, it has to be more than that."

How To Apply It:

1. Audit your program. Write down every exercise you're doing. Do you have a squat pattern? A hinge? A lunge? A push and pull? Core activation? If not, you've got holes.

2. Regress before you progress. Can you do a goblet squat with perfect form for 15 reps? If not, you're not ready for a barbell back squat. Master the easier version first.

3. Warm up and activate. Don't skip your glute bridges, banded walks, or scapular retractions. These "boring" movements prepare your body to move well under load.

4. Track consistency, not complexity. You don't need 47 exercises. You need six movements done well, three to four times per week, for six months.

5. Eat whole foods first. Before you buy another supplement, ask yourself: am I eating enough protein? Vegetables? Whole grains? A supplement can't fix a broken foundation.

Pro Tip: If a coach or influencer is always showing you advanced, flashy movements but never teaching you to squat, hinge, or press properly, they're a content creator, not a coach.

Try This Today: Film yourself doing a bodyweight squat. Watch it back. Are your knees caving in? Is your back rounding? If yes, that's your starting point.

Lesson 2: Fear of Injury Is Keeping You Injured

What It Is:
Pain and injury create fear. That fear makes you stop moving. But stopping movement, especially controlled, progressive movement, often makes the problem worse. The key is to regress, rebuild confidence, and prove to yourself that movement doesn't equal danger.

Why It Matters:
"People are just so scared of injuries," I said in the episode. And it's a real fear, if you get injured, you can't work, can't train, can't play with your kids. But Dani's approach flips the script. "You have to prove to them that they can complete that movement," she said. "Get them doing a regressed version. They do that 15, 20 reps, couple of sets, okay, that doesn't hurt. Good. That movement's okay. Then just slowly build into it."

When you avoid movement out of fear, your nervous system learns that movement equals threat. That makes pain worse, not better.

How To Apply It:

1. Identify the painful movement. Let's say squatting hurts your knee. Don't avoid squatting forever, find a version that doesn't hurt.

2. Regress the exercise. Try a box squat, or a goblet squat, or even a sit-to-stand from a chair. Go lighter, go slower, reduce range of motion.

3. Do it pain-free. Complete 2-3 sets of 12-15 reps with zero pain. Let your nervous system learn: "This is safe."

4. Progress slowly. Add a tiny bit of load, or depth, or speed. One variable at a time. No jumps.

5. Don't progress until you're ready. As Dani said, "Coaches are too quick to progress. It's so much easier to make an exercise harder, but to sit with the easier version, that's a lot harder for people, even as a coach."

Pro Tip: If something hurts, don't just push through it. But also don't avoid it completely. Find the edge where you can move without pain, that's your starting line.

Try This Today: Pick one movement that scares you or causes discomfort. Do the easiest possible version of it, five reps, no weight, slow and controlled. Notice how your body feels.

Lesson 3: Strength Training Is Nervous System Medicine

What It Is:
Lifting weights isn't just about building muscle or losing fat. It's a form of nervous system regulation. When you're focused on your form, your breath, your tempo, and the weight in your hands, your brain can't also spiral into stress, anxiety, or rumination. Training grounds you in your body.

Why It Matters:
Naila, my co-host and a therapist, put it beautifully: "Lifting weights literally grounds you into the body and the earth. The act of deadlifting or squatting, you have to have that mind-body awareness. You have to be so focused: your form, your technique, your breath work. Everything is happening at once."

Dani agreed. She discovered this when her first coach taught her tempo training, slowing down the movement and controlling every inch. "I realised I wasn't able to stress about all the things I was doing back then and think about tempo at the same time," she said. "It really took away all of my external worries just for that moment in the gym."

In a world where everyone's scrolling, multitasking, and stuck in their heads, strength training forces presence.

How To Apply It:

1. Use tempo. Try a 3-1-3 tempo: three seconds down, one-second pause, three seconds up. It's humbling. It's hard. And it demands your full attention.

2. Focus on the muscle. Don't just move the weight. Feel the muscle working. Where's the tension? Are you rushing? Slow down.

3. Breathe deliberately. Inhale on the eccentric (lowering), exhale on the concentric (lifting). Let your breath anchor you.

4. Turn off distractions. No phone between sets. No scrolling. Just be in your body for 45-60 minutes.

5. Notice how you feel after. Not just physically, emotionally. Most people report feeling calmer, clearer, more grounded. That's nervous system regulation.

Pro Tip: If you're anxious or overwhelmed, don't skip the gym, but don't go hard, either. Do slow, controlled movements with moderate weight. Let your body reset.

Try This Today: Do 10 goblet squats with a 4-second descent. No music, no distractions. Just you, the movement, and your breath.

Lesson 4: Most People Aren't Bodybuilders (And That's Completely Fine)

What It Is:
Bodybuilding isn't just "going to the gym and eating chicken and rice." It's a sport that requires discipline, sacrifice, structure, mental resilience, and identity alignment. Dani competed five times and turned pro in 2019. She knows what it takes. And she's clear: most people who think they want to be bodybuilders don't actually want what the sport demands.

Why It Matters:
"A lot of people in the fitness industry think, 'Okay, I've been training at the gym for a couple of years. The next step has to be a bodybuilding show,'" Dani said. "Well, you don't. It's not like you pick up a basketball once and then you have to go play basketball. You still have to enjoy it and be good at it."

Naila added important context: some of her therapy clients tried bodybuilding and came out burned, because the sport mirrored back severe self-worth issues, body image trauma, and childhood wounds. "Not everyone is actually a bodybuilder and supposed to be," she said. "And that's okay, because everyone's got their own path."

The lesson? Don't chase someone else's identity. Find your true form.

How To Apply It:

1. Ask yourself: do I want this, or do I want the idea of this? Be honest. Do you want to be on stage in a bikini under lights, or do you just want to look good at the beach?

2. Test the process, not just the outcome. Sign up for a 12-week structured program. Do you enjoy the discipline? The repetition? The meal prep? If not, that's data.

3. Notice how your body and mind respond. Are you energised, or depleted? Confident, or obsessive? Your body will tell you if this is your path.

4. Find what fits your identity. Maybe your version of "athletic" is CrossFit, powerlifting, running, yoga, or just consistent strength training. All are valid.

5. Don't force it. If bodybuilding (or any goal) is making you miserable, you're allowed to stop. That's not failure, that's self-awareness.

Pro Tip: The right goal should challenge you, but it shouldn't destroy you. If you're constantly burnt out, injured, or mentally struggling, it's not the right fit.

Lesson 5: Building Multiple Identities Isn't About Doing More: It's About Saying Yes to Yourself

What It Is:
Dani is an osteopath, a pro athlete, a business owner, a podcast host, an app founder, and an educator. Most people assume she's "doing it all." But her secret isn't doing more, it's ruthless prioritisation, small trusted teams, and systems that allow her to say no to almost everything.

Why It Matters:
I asked Dani how she balances it all. Her answer surprised me. "I'm not actively competing in bodybuilding anymore. I haven't since 2019," she said. "There's only so much I feel that we can do. You don't want to be a jack of all trades."

She uses Google Calendar religiously. She has a small, trusted team for each business. And she's learned to say no, a lot. "It's not saying no," she explained. "It's saying yes to yourself. When you say yes to one thing, you're saying no to something else."

The lesson? You don't build a life by adding more. You build it by protecting what matters.

How To Apply It:

1. Write down everything you're doing. Work, side projects, hobbies, commitments. All of it.

2. Highlight what's aligned. Which activities connect to your core identity or long-term goals? Which are just noise?

3. Cut or delegate the rest. If it doesn't serve you, stop doing it. If someone else can do it, hand it off.

4. Time-block your calendar. Dani swears by Google Calendar. Block time for the big rocks first; training, deep work, family. Everything else fits around that.

5. Say no without guilt. Practice this: "That sounds great, but I'm fully committed right now." You don't owe anyone an explanation.

Pro Tip: Every time you say yes to something new, ask: "What am I saying no to?" If the answer is sleep, training, or sanity, don't do it.

Try This Today: Open your calendar. Block one hour tomorrow for something that matters to you; training, creative work, rest. Protect it like a client appointment.

Lesson 6: Movement: Based Rehab Beats Passive Treatment for Long-Term Results

What It Is:
Traditional allied health often relies on hands-on therapy, massage, manipulation, ultrasound. Dani's approach, shaped by working with the late Dr Andrew Lock, flips that. She teaches people how to move better, activate dormant muscles, and rebuild strength. Movement is the medicine, not the massage table.

Why It Matters:
"I can treat you on the bench for an hour and you feel great, but if you go back into the gym and you don't know how to actually move your body, the problem's going to come back," Dani explained. Through United Health Education, she's now teaching this philosophy to practitioners worldwide. The goal? Empower people to fix themselves through movement, not depend on weekly adjustments.

How To Apply It:

1. If you're in pain, don't just get treatment, learn to move differently. Ask your physio or osteo: "What exercises can I do at home?"

2. Prioritise activation and control. Glute bridges, dead bugs, banded walks, these aren't glamorous, but they teach your body how to stabilise and move safely.

3. Rebuild load tolerance gradually. Start with bodyweight, then light resistance, then progressive load. Your body needs to learn it can handle stress.

4. Don't become dependent on passive treatment. Hands-on work has a place, but if you're seeing someone twice a week for months and nothing's changing, you need movement, not more massage.

Pro Tip: The best practitioners teach you how to not need them anymore.

Mini Case: Naila's Dad and the Power of Lifelong Strength

Naila shared a deeply personal story during the episode. From age 15, she watched her father's health decline due to Parkinson's disease. He passed away when she was 27. "Seeing him deteriorate, not being able to move his body, walk, swallow, it was the most painful thing I've ever experienced," she said.

Now, in her work as a therapist, she tells clients: "Think about your 80-year-old self. Where's that muscle mass when you're 80 and might have a fall?"

Dani echoed this. "We need to still be promoting strength training... it's going to protect you when you're older. It's going to keep you young."

"Movement is medicine, and so is owning who you are becoming." - Dr Dani Antonellos

Quick Wins Checklist (Do These Today)

• Film yourself doing a bodyweight squat and check your form

• Pick one "boring" activation exercise (glute bridges, banded walks) and do 2 sets of 15 reps

• Block one hour in your calendar tomorrow for training or rest and protect it

• Unfollow three fitness accounts that make you feel anxious or inadequate

• Do 10 slow goblet squats with a 4-second descent, no distractions, just presence

• Ask yourself: "Is this goal mine, or am I chasing someone else's identity?"

Closing Insight

The basics aren't broken. We are.

We've been sold the idea that if something's simple, it can't be powerful. That if it's not new, it's not worth doing. But the truth is this: the squat pattern hasn't changed. The hinge hasn't changed. Your body's need for protein, sleep, and progressive load hasn't changed. What's changed is the noise around it.

Dani's career is proof that you don't have to choose between being a clinician and a competitor, between building businesses and building your body. But you do have to choose your yeses carefully. You do have to protect the basics. And you do have to move, not because it's sexy, but because it's medicine.

If you're in pain, movement is the cure. If you're stressed, the barbell will ground you. And if you're lost in someone else's highlight reel, the best thing you can do is close the app, open your calendar, and ask: what does my true form actually look like?

Watch me on YouTube

https://youtu.be/LOGsaXvW1cU 

Listen to the True From Podcast:

Apple Podcast -

https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/the-true-form-podcast/id1593804496

Spotify -

https://open.spotify.com/show/6RVH2O6MbLOCohBKPhXO0L?si=ZI8D3MnhSfSjnohSXYN_MQ

Everywhere els - 

https://trueform.buzzsprout.com

Sponsor: If you’re interested in trying red and near-infrared light therapy for recovery, pain, and overall health, check out Lumaflex. Use code TRUEFORM for 10% off: https://lumaflex.com.au/TRUEFORM

DECIDE: How Courage and Extreme Discipline Change Your Life

What an ultra-endurance athlete, ex-soldier and coach can teach us about discipline, calling and choosing your pain.

Watch On YouTube

〰️

Watch On YouTube 〰️

TL;DR

• Discipline isn’t something the military, a coach or a program “gives” you, it’s a choice you train through structure, systems and small reps.

• Communicating in the right “frequency” and authority is the difference between clients ignoring you and taking action.

• Your life changes when you stop trying to serve “everyone” and start choosing the right clients, the right circle and the right calling.

• The DECIDE framework turns big, scary decisions into clear steps you can actually follow.

• Courage is not feeling fearless, it’s choosing the harder, aligned path even when you’re cold, scared and tired.

🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts. 

Introduction

What would make someone sell their house, sleep in a storage unit and in the back of a car at minus 30, just to chase a race that pays nothing; 10 Ironmans in 10 days across six Hawaiian islands?

That’s the lived reality of JD Tremblay, a French Canadian ex-military engineer, naturopathic practitioner and ultra‑triathlete who joined me on The True Form Podcast to talk about courage, calling and discipline. He’s one of only a handful of people on the planet to complete the Epic Deca (10 Ironmans in 10 days), and at the same time he’s a dad, a philanthropist working with the UN, and a coach helping others find their own path.

In this episode, we dug into the difference between structure and discipline, how “frequencies” and authority shape behaviour, and what it really costs to live a life that matches your calling. JD shared the DECIDE framework he used to make brutal choices, from sleeping in his car to training for a world championship in Malta while turning 40.

If you’re a coach, PT or just someone who knows there’s more in you, this article pulls out the most practical lessons from our conversation, and turns them into steps you can start using today.

Listen On Apple Podcast

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Listen On Apple Podcast 〰️

Listen On Spotify

〰️

Listen On Spotify 〰️

Lesson 1: Discipline vs Structure: Stop Waiting To Be “Given” Discipline

What It Is:
Discipline is your decision to act consistently toward a goal, while structure is the environment, rules and routines around you. Structure can support discipline, but it can’t replace it.

Why It Matters:
Many of us secretly hope that joining the military, signing up to a program or hiring a coach will “fix” our discipline. JD’s experience shows this is backwards. The military gave him structure – early mornings, bed inspections, rules, but discipline started earlier, with his dad and his own choices. Seeing this clearly is powerful. It stops you waiting for external saviours and puts the responsibility (and power) back in your hands.

As JD puts it, the military “gives you the structure, not the discipline.” Once basic training ends, no one forces you to make your bed, train harder or eat better. That’s on you.

How To Apply It:

1. List the structures you already have. Work schedule, gym membership, training plan, coach, family routines, write them down.

2. Circle what you’re actually using. Be honest. A program you ignore doesn’t count as structure.

3. Pick one daily action that’s 100% your choice. For example, making your bed, a 10-minute walk, or logging your food, something small but non‑negotiable.

4. Tie it to identity, not mood. Instead of “I feel like training,” think “I’m someone who trains at 7 am, feelings or not.”

5. Use structure to make discipline easier. Lay out clothes the night before, set alarms, train with a friend, book sessions in your calendar.

6. Review weekly. Ask: did I act with discipline inside the structure I have, or just lean on excuses?

Pro Tip:
Don’t add new structure until you’re consistently using the structure you already have.

Try This Today:
Tomorrow morning, make your bed perfectly the second you get up, not because it “matters,” but because you said you would.

Lesson 2: Frequencies and Authority: Why People Don’t Listen (And How To Change It)

What It Is:
“Frequencies” are the way a message is delivered tone, context, emotion and “authority” is the perceived weight behind it story, credentials, legal power or lived experience. Together, they determine whether someone actually hears you and acts.

Why It Matters:
You can give people the best plan in the world and they still won’t follow it. As a PT, coach or leader, it’s easy to assume “they don’t care” or “they’re lazy.” JD flips this. Often, the message is arriving on the wrong frequency, from the wrong type of authority.

He uses a simple example: a partner asks you to mow the lawn three times. You ignore it. Then a mate says, “My wife loves it when I mow the lawn shirtless,” and suddenly you sprint outside. Same action, different frequency and authority. When you understand this, you stop shouting louder and start speaking smarter.

How To Apply It:

1. Identify your natural frequency. Are you calm, intense, jokey, blunt, nurturing? Own it, that’s part of your power.

2. Map your authority. Story (your journey), education (degrees, certs), legal/role (coach, doctor, military rank). Which is strongest for you right now?

3. Match the person, not your ego. Some clients respond to story (“I’ve been where you are”), others to data (“here’s what the tests show”), others to firm direction (“this is the plan”).

4. Lead with love as your highest frequency. JD talks about love as a frequency you can’t fake, genuine care. When people feel that, they listen differently.

5. Stop fighting for the wrong ears. If someone only respects doctors and you’re not one, don’t try to be. Either bring in that authority (e.g. refer out, collaborate), or accept they’re not your person.

6. Ask for feedback. “When does what I say really land for you?” Listen to the answer and adapt.

Pro Tip:
The goal isn’t to be every frequency, it’s to know yours, own it, and work with people who respond to it.

Try This Today:
With one client or friend, ask: “What made you finally take action on [thing]?” Notice whether it was story, data, tone, or timing.

Lesson 3: Choose Your Clients and Circle: Don’t Chase “Everyone”

What It Is:
Instead of trying to help everyone, pick the people you are best suited to serve and deliberately build your life around those clients, friends and partners.

Why It Matters:
In the episode, JD is blunt about coaches who say, “I just need all the clients; I just need to make 10K a month.” That mindset leads to desperation, poor fits and burnout. When you work with anyone who waves a card, you end up reacting instead of deciding. You accept people who drain you, don’t respect your authority and don’t align with your values.

On the flip side, when you intentionally choose your clients and circle, you create what JD calls an almost guaranteed path to success – as long as death or some major external event doesn’t break the dynamic. The right people amplify you; the wrong people slow you down or pull you off course entirely.

How To Apply It:

1. Define your “ideal human,” not just “ideal client.” Age and goals matter less than values and attitude (e.g. honest, willing to do hard things, open to feedback).

2. Start tiny and real. JD talks about starting with a $20 client, cheap, but with a clear outcome and the promise of a testimonial or short video. Don’t overcomplicate the first step.

3. Ask for one clear win and one clear proof. For early clients, agree: “In 4-8 weeks, we’ll aim for X. In return, if you’re happy, I’d love a 10-20 second video about your experience.”

4. Build by word of mouth. Encourage happy clients to talk about you to people they already like and respect. Those referrals are far more likely to fit your values.

5. Say ‘no’ faster. If someone won’t commit, can’t follow basic instructions, or clashes with your values, let them go, even if they’re waving money.

6. Curate your friends and mentors the same way. Choose people whose “frequency” and authority move you towards your calling, not away from it.

Pro Tip:
A “cheap” client who gives you a strong testimonial and three good referrals is more valuable than a high‑ticket nightmare who drains your energy.

Try This Today:
Write one sentence: “The kind of person I’m built to help is…” Fill it in honestly, then read it before you post or pitch anything this week.

Lesson 4: Calling and Identity: Stop Trying To Be Someone Else’s Body Part

What It Is:
You have a role you’re uniquely suited for your “calling.” Trying to live someone else’s calling (because it looks more glamorous or profitable) is like a finger trying to be an ear.

Why It Matters:
JD uses a Christian picture of the “body of Christ”: different parts, different functions. Whether you’re religious or not, the point is clear. Social media constantly pushes you to become “the next” someone, the next Goggins, the next famous coach, the next entrepreneur with a laptop on a beach. The problem is, you’re not them.

He gives down‑to‑earth examples: people who would be brilliant electricians being pushed into university because “everyone in the family has a degree,” or people chasing high‑ticket coaching clients when they’d actually thrive organising events or running trades. When you fight your own design, you end up numb, resentful or addicted just to cope.

How To Apply It:

1. Notice what pulls you, not what impresses you. In “The Alchemist,” the shepherd feels a deep pull to go on a journey. What are the things you can’t stop thinking about, even when they don’t make sense?

2. List where you’re already “weirdly good.” Skills that feel natural to you but hard for others (organising, speaking, listening, systems, technical work).

3. Separate fear from wisdom. Fear says, “Don’t try this, you might fail.” Wisdom says, “This path will seriously harm you or your family.” Don’t confuse the two.

4. Experiment small. Before you quit your job, test your calling in low‑risk ways, coach two clients, plan one event, start one small project.

5. Stop copying people out of context. It’s fine to learn from big names, but remember JD’s point: reading billionaires from the back seat of a frozen car didn’t help him as much as studying people one or two steps ahead.

6. Accept that value is different from visibility. The world may pay more attention to certain roles, but that doesn’t mean your quieter role is less valuable.

Pro Tip:
If you constantly need to numb yourself (with work, food, screens or substances) to tolerate your current path, that’s a signal you’re off‑calling, not a sign to push harder.

Try This Today:
Write down three people you envy. Then, next to each name, write what you think you actually want that they have (freedom, impact, money, attention). Ask yourself: “Is there a version of this that fits who I really am?”

Lesson 5: The DECIDE Framework: Making Brutal Decisions Without Losing Yourself

What It Is:
DECIDE is JD’s acronym for how he made some of the hardest choices of his life, including selling his house and living in a storage unit to fund the Epic Deca. It’s a way to base decisions on data, capacity and calling, not just emotion.

(Note: The full breakdown isn’t spelled out letter‑by‑letter in the transcript, but several key components are explained.)

Why It Matters:
We romanticise big decisions: “follow your dreams,” “burn the boats” but the reality is messy: kids, bills, mental health, responsibilities. JD didn’t just leap blindly. He looked at data (what others had done), his energy, cognitive load (what he could handle), and inflammation (the physical stress his body was under). He knew he wouldn’t feel “happy” sleeping in a car at minus 30, so he didn’t use feelings as his compass.

A framework like DECIDE helps you avoid both reckless impulsiveness and endless paralysis.

How To Apply It (adapted from JD’s explanation):

1. D - Data over emotion. Ask: “What are the actual facts?” Look at people one or two steps ahead of you. What did they do? What did it cost them?

2. E - Energy. Check your current energy levels. Are you already exhausted? How much extra load can you realistically carry right now?

3. C - Cognitive load. Consider what’s on your mind: work stress, kids, health. If adding a big new thing makes you likely to snap at people you love, adjust the plan.

4. I - Inflammation. Notice your physical state, poor sleep, junk food, chronic pain. Big decisions made from a highly inflamed, run‑down body are often poor ones.

5. D - Decision timing. Some opportunities are time‑sensitive, others aren’t. Ask, “What happens if I wait 3-6 months while I improve my energy and inflammation?”

6. E - Execute. At some point, thinking must turn into action. Start with the smallest irreversible step that moves you in the right direction.

Pro Tip:
Don’t use DECIDE to justify what you already want. Use it to test whether your desire is actually workable given your current reality.

Try This Today:
Pick one decision you’ve been stuck on. Spend five minutes listing the data only, no feelings, just facts. See how that changes your sense of the situation.

Lesson 6: Courage and Choosing Your Pain: Couch vs Second Workout

What It Is:
Courage isn’t about feeling fearless; it’s choosing the harder, aligned pain instead of the easier, numbing pain.

Why It Matters:
JD is clear that there’s pain on the couch and pain in the second workout. One leads to regret, health issues and feeling like you’ve wasted your potential. The other hurts in the moment but builds strength, self‑respect and opportunities you can’t see yet.

He doesn’t minimise how hard it was: sleeping at truck stops in a frozen car, seeing his son on weekends while pretending everything was fine, and then going back to a storage unit to sleep. He wasn’t laughing at the time. But he saw that pain as part of a bigger story he was willing to live.

How To Apply It:

1. Name your two pains. For any situation, identify the “easy pain” (short‑term comfort, long‑term regret) and the “hard pain” (short‑term effort, long‑term growth).

2. Connect the hard pain to a clear why. Training twice a day is pointless suffering if you don’t know what it’s for. For JD, it was world‑class races and becoming the man he believed he was meant to be.

3. Shrink the hard pain into reps. Instead of “transform my life,” commit to “show up to the gym three times this week,” or “make three sales calls.”

4. Normalise fear. Expect to feel scared and under‑prepared. Courage is acting with those feelings present.

5. Keep one promise to yourself daily. It can be tiny. The habit of keeping your own word is the foundation of courage.

6. Tell the truth to one safe person. Share where you’re choosing the couch pain. Honesty makes it harder to hide from yourself.

Pro Tip:
If your “courage” constantly destroys your health or relationships, it’s probably ego or escapism wearing a courage mask. Real courage includes responsibility.

Try This Today:
Tonight, ask yourself: “Where did I choose the couch today, and where did I choose the second workout?” No judgement, just awareness.

Mini Case/Example

“People see me for my accomplishments, but I see me from all of the failures.” - JD Tremblay

He talks about picking up his son from his ex‑partner’s place, taking him to a play centre, buying him a slushie and a chocolate bar, then dropping him back and going to sleep in his car at a truck stop in the middle of a Canadian winter.

From the outside, that season could look like failure: broke, divorced, living between a storage unit and a car. From the inside, JD saw it as a purposeful sacrifice, part of the story he would later tell to help others and build real authority. That perspective shift, failure as raw material, not final verdict is one of the most powerful takeaways from his journey.

Quick Wins Checklist (Do These Today)

• Make your bed or complete one tiny task immediately after waking, just because you said you would.

• Write one sentence about the kind of person you’re built to help, and say no to one thing that doesn’t fit it.

• Ask one client, friend or partner: “When does what I say really land for you?” and listen for their frequency.

• Take five minutes to list the raw data (no feelings) around one decision you’re stuck on.

• Name one “easy pain” and one “hard pain” in your life right now and choose the hard one once today.

• Capture one short win (a message from a client, a PB, a grateful comment) in a note on your phone to start “stacking success.”

Closing Insight

Underneath all the extreme stories: 10 Ironmans in 10 days, storage units, frozen cars, this conversation is about something simple and uncomfortable: you are responsible for the life you build. Structures can help, mentors can guide, tools and AI can support, but none of them can choose your calling or do your reps for you.

JD’s story shows that discipline is not a personality trait you’re born with; it’s a muscle that grows when you act in line with who you’re meant to be, especially when it hurts. His ideas about frequencies and authority remind us that influence is as much about how and who we are as what we know. And the DECIDE framework proves that even the biggest, scariest choices can be broken into pieces you can actually handle.

You don’t need to sell your house or run 10 Ironmans to apply this. You just need to start making one more decision from courage instead of fear, one more action from calling instead of copying. If you do that consistently, your life will start to look very different from the inside out.

Watch me on YouTube

https://youtu.be/b9pm2JAGXkY

Listen to the True From Podcast:

Apple Podcast -

https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/the-true-form-podcast/id1593804496

Spotify -

https://open.spotify.com/show/6RVH2O6MbLOCohBKPhXO0L?si=ZI8D3MnhSfSjnohSXYN_MQ

Everywhere els - 

https://trueform.buzzsprout.com

How Dr Aaron Hartman Thinks About Real Health, Longevity and Doing the Basics Well

Why a triple board-certified doctor thinks the “unsexy” basics will change your health more than any hack, and how to start today.

Watch On YouTube

〰️

Watch On YouTube 〰️

TL;DR

• Why mastering the basics of health beats chasing every new trend – in medicine, training, nutrition and recovery.

• How to think about diet, movement, fasting and protein in a way that actually fits real life, not social media.

• Why curiosity, self-trust and not accepting “it’s all in your head” are critical if you have stubborn health issues.

• The overlooked role of oral health, stress and overtraining in hormone problems, fatigue and long-term disease.

• How to use tools like wearables without letting the data stress you out and make your health worse.

🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts. 

Introduction

Some episodes stay with you long after you hit stop. This conversation with Dr Aaron Hartman is one of them.

Aaron is a triple board-certified medical doctor who built a successful conventional practice before something close to home forced him to question the system he was trained in. His adopted daughter, Anna, was exposed to crystal meth in the womb, had a stroke before birth, was born functionally blind and “a mess basically”, as Aaron puts it. Specialists expected her to spend life hunched over in a wheelchair, with a feeding tube and very little independence. Instead, she learned to talk, see, write and is now in her twenties, moving out of home and beating every prognosis she was given.

Her story pushed Aaron to become “the 15th doctor” people see when everyone else has told them it’s all in their head. Across more than 100,000 clinical encounters, he’s worked with people dealing with chronic fatigue, fibromyalgia, mould-related illness, post-concussion issues, complex hormone problems and more, often after years of frustration in the traditional system.

In this episode, we dig into what actually moves the needle for long-term health and performance: simple behaviours done consistently, a deep respect for basics, and a refusal to outsource all your thinking to “experts”. We talk about diet, movement, fasting, protein, overtraining, women’s physiology, oral health, wearables and the mindset you need if you feel something is wrong but no one has given you answers yet.

Listen On Apple Podcast

〰️

Listen On Apple Podcast 〰️

Listen On Spotify

〰️

Listen On Spotify 〰️

Lesson 1: Master the Basics Before You Chase Health “Hacks”

What It Is:
Focusing on the simple, proven foundations of health, food, movement, sleep, environment and purpose, before layering on advanced therapies, supplements or protocols.

Why It Matters:
Aaron sees a pattern in medicine, sport and everyday life: people try to skip the groundwork and sprint straight to the “cool” stuff. New diets, peptides, stem cells, fancy tests, extreme training. All while ignoring the habits that actually drive longevity and day-to-day function. When the basics aren’t in place, the advanced tools don’t work well, don’t last, or even cause harm. Just like an athlete who wants to hit bicycle kicks before they can pass properly, a body without fundamentals in place can’t handle complex interventions for long.

How To Apply It:

1. Audit your current basics: sleep, food, movement, stress, social connection and time outside. Give each one a simple 1-5 rating for how consistent you are.

2. Pick one area that is clearly under a 3 and commit to improving only that for the next 2-4 weeks instead of chasing a new supplement or protocol.

3. Before you buy or start anything “advanced”, ask: “Have I done the boring work in this area for at least 3 months?” If not, start there.

4. When you hear about a new trend (diet, protocol, gadget), write down how it would sit on top of, not replace, your foundations. If you can’t answer that, park it for now.

5. Use the Blue Zones idea as a filter: real food, daily movement, clean environments, community and purpose. If a new idea doesn’t fit with that, be sceptical.

Pro Tip:
If a health promise sounds like you can “win the marathon in the first 100 metres”, it’s probably skipping the basics you actually need.

Try This Today:
Write down three behaviours you already know you should be doing (for example: 7 hours sleep, 8,000 steps, cooking one real-food meal). Circle one and schedule it for today.

Lesson 2: Trust Your Body, Stay Curious and Don’t Accept “It’s All in Your Head”

What It Is:
Choosing to trust your own experience of your body, staying curious, and continuing to look for answers when something feels wrong, even if you’ve seen multiple doctors already.

Why It Matters:
Aaron works with people who are often told nothing is wrong, or that their symptoms are purely psychological. Conditions like chronic fatigue and fibromyalgia were dismissed as psychiatric for years, even though we now know they involve inflammation in the brain. When you hand over all your authority, you can get stuck inside the blind spots of the system. Experts are human, systems are slow to change, and guidelines often lag decades behind what the best clinicians are already doing. Curiosity and self-trust are what keep people searching until they find someone willing to look wider and think differently.

How To Apply It:

1. When you feel something is off; brain fog, gut issues, sleep changes, weird pains, write it down. Symptoms, timing, triggers and anything that makes it better or worse.

2. If a practitioner says “your tests are normal, there’s nothing wrong”, ask: “What else could we look at?” If they dismiss you, that’s useful information about fit.

3. Educate yourself from a few solid sources rather than endless scrolling. Use that to ask better questions, not to self-diagnose everything.

4. Look for clinicians who are willing to say “I don’t know yet, let’s explore”, rather than “these are the five things I treat; you don’t have one, so you’re fine.”

5. If you’ve seen many doctors, aim for one who will walk alongside you over time, not just tick boxes in a single visit.

Pro Tip:
Being curious about your health doesn’t mean ignoring mental health, it means not letting “it’s all in your head” be the end of the conversation.

Try This Today:
Take five minutes to jot down your top three recurring symptoms and one clear question you want to ask at your next appointment.

Lesson 3: Food, Movement and Longevity: Why Sitting Is the New Smoking

What It Is:
Building a long, healthy life on the core pillars seen in real-world long-lived populations: real food, regular movement baked into your day, clean environments and strong social ties.

Why It Matters:
Aaron points to Blue Zones: places like Okinawa, Sardinia and Nicoya, where people often live past 100 without access to high-end hospitals. They don’t share one magic diet, but they do share patterns: they eat mostly real food (not ultra-processed), live in relatively clean environments, move as part of daily life, stay connected to family and community, and have a clear sense of purpose. In contrast, modern sedentary living and constant sitting drive up the risk of diabetes, heart disease and “all-cause mortality”. Movement really is a super drug, but it needs to be sustainable, not another form of overtraining.

How To Apply It:

1. Shift your focus from “perfect diet” to “mostly real food”: plenty of whole, minimally processed foods most days, in whatever pattern fits your culture and preferences.

2. Break up sitting time: set a timer to stand, walk, or do a few simple movements every 30-60 minutes during the day.

3. Build movement into your lifestyle, not just your workouts, walk to the shops, take the stairs, carry things, play with your kids.

4. Schedule one meaningful social interaction each week that isn’t on a screen a walk, coffee, dinner or training session with someone you care about.

5. Ask yourself what gives your life purpose right now, raising kids, doing good work, serving your community and keep that front of mind as your “why” for health habits.

Pro Tip:
If your step count is low and you’re glued to a chair all day, you don’t need a peptide, you need to move more, consistently.

Try This Today:
Go for a 10–15 minute walk outside after your next meal and leave your phone in your pocket.

Lesson 4: Fasting, Protein and Overtraining: Getting the Nuance Right

What It Is:
Using tools like fasting, higher protein intake and serious training in a way that respects your current health, age, sex and life load – instead of blindly copying what you see online.

Why It Matters:
Fasting has real benefits for things like metabolic flexibility, brain clearance and mitochondrial function. But Aaron sees many people who are too nutrient-depleted, stressed and toxic to tolerate aggressive fasting straight away. They feel awful, blame fasting, then swing back to constant snacking. Similarly, most people under-eat protein, especially as they age, when recycling and absorption drop. On the other side, men and women alike are often overtraining on top of full-time work and life stress, then wondering why testosterone is low, cycles are disrupted, sleep is wrecked and recovery is poor.

How To Apply It:

1. Build a base before fasting: tidy up your diet, increase protein, and make sure you’re eating real food consistently for at least a few weeks.

2. Start small: try delaying breakfast by an hour or having a 12-hour overnight fast before attempting longer fasts. Notice how you feel.

3. Aim for at least roughly 1 g of protein per kg of bodyweight as a starting point, and more if you’re very active or older. Adjust to your own context and medical advice.

4. Look at your weekly training load honestly: if you work a full-time job and are doing long, intense sessions most days, you may be overtraining rather than underperforming.

5. Women in particular should pay attention to menstrual cycles, energy, sleep and body composition as feedback. Irregular cycles, losing normal fat in feminine areas and extreme fatigue are red flags, not “discipline”.

Pro Tip:
If you “can’t skip a meal” without getting angry, shaky or foggy, that’s a sign of metabolic inflexibility, not a personal failing and a clue to work on your foundations first.

Try This Today:
At your next meal, build your plate around a solid protein source first, then add carbs and fats, instead of the other way around.

Lesson 5: Oral Health: The Tiny Habit That Affects Your Whole Body

What It Is:
Treating your mouth as a key part of your immune and cardiovascular system, not just a cosmetic concern.

Why It Matters:
We swallow trillions of bacteria a day. The bugs living in your mouth seed your entire digestive tract and even show up in places like arterial plaques and aneurysms. Bleeding gums, tartar build-up, poor oral pH and chronic dental issues can drive systemic inflammation, increase the risk of heart disease, pregnancy complications and gut problems. On top of that, the way you care for your mouth, including the type of mouthwash you use, can affect nitric oxide production, blood pressure and metabolic health. It’s one of the simplest, most overlooked levers for long-term health.

How To Apply It:

1. Brush your teeth thoroughly twice a day and floss daily, paying attention to whether your gums bleed or feel sore.

2. Notice your breath, tongue and tartar build-up. Persistent bad breath, a coated tongue or rapid tartar can be signs of oral dysbiosis (an imbalance of bacteria).

3. Be cautious with strong antiseptic mouthwashes used daily, they can wipe out beneficial bacteria that help with blood pressure and metabolism.

4. Consider testing your mouth pH with simple strips; a very acidic mouth can reduce natural tooth mineralisation and alter your oral microbiome.

5. If you have stubborn gut issues, cardiovascular disease or autoimmune conditions, talk to your dentist and doctor about how your oral health might be contributing, rather than treating them as separate worlds.

Pro Tip:
Your mouth is the front door to your gut and bloodstream, treating it well often pays off far beyond a nicer smile.

Try This Today:
Spend an extra two minutes tonight brushing and gently scraping or brushing your tongue, then notice how your mouth feels in the morning.

Lesson 6: Wearables and Data: Using Numbers Without Losing Your Mind

What It Is:
Using devices like rings, watches or continuous glucose monitors as feedback tools, not as judges or sources of anxiety.

Why It Matters:
Aaron likes wearables because they can give useful data on sleep, movement, heart rate variability and temperature - all things we talk about but rarely measure. They can help you see patterns: how late meals, screens or alcohol affect your sleep; how stress spikes your heart rate; how illness shows up before you feel it. But for some people, the data itself becomes a stressor. Worrying about every sleep score, glucose spike or lab result can send cortisol up, push blood sugar higher and make things worse than if you didn’t track at all.

How To Apply It:

1. Be clear on what you want from a device before you buy it: better sleep? More steps? Early illness warning? Choose one or two metrics that matter most.

2. Check your data at set times (for example, once in the morning), not constantly throughout the day.

3. Use trends over weeks, not single days, to guide changes. One bad night or one high reading is a data point, not a diagnosis.

4. If you notice you’re becoming obsessive, anxious or changing behaviour out of fear rather than curiosity, step back - or stop looking at the data for a while.

5. Remember that for some people, numbers are better held by their coach or doctor, with summaries shared periodically, rather than self-monitoring everything in real time.

Pro Tip:
If checking your sleep score ruins your mood for the day, the device is using you - not the other way around.

Try This Today:
If you use a wearable, look at only one metric tomorrow morning (for example, total sleep) and ignore the rest for 24 hours.

Mini Case/Example

“Movement is the new super drug.” - Dr Aaron Hartman

“If you don’t give people what they want, you can’t give them what they need.” - Dr Aaron Hartman

“If working with me makes you stressed, you’d be better off if you’d never met me.” - Dr Aaron Hartman

“If she could do this, you can do it too. No matter where you’re at, no matter how hard things are, there are answers.” - Dr Aaron Hartman, speaking about his daughter Anna

Quick Wins Checklist (Do These Today)

• Go for a 10–15 minute walk outside after one meal, without checking your phone.

• Add an extra serve of protein to one meal; for example, an extra egg, a bit more meat, fish or a higher-protein plant option.

• Take five minutes to write down your three main symptoms or health concerns and one question you want to explore further.

• Brush and floss slowly tonight, then gently clean your tongue and notice whether your gums bleed.

• Turn off all screens at least 30-60 minutes before bed and dim the lights.

• Tomorrow morning, step outside with your coffee or tea and watch the sunrise, spending a few minutes feeling grateful for one thing in your life.

Closing Insight

Underneath the science, the protocols and the big medical titles, Aaron’s message is surprisingly simple: the basics still matter most, and you’re allowed to trust your own body. You don’t have to accept that feeling tired, foggy or “off” is just your new normal, and you don’t have to chase every shiny hack to get better. Instead, you can build a strong foundation, real food, regular movement, good sleep, lower stress, a healthy mouth, meaningful relationships and a sense of purpose, and then layer the clever tools on top if and when they make sense.

Curiosity and self-respect sit at the centre of all of this. If something feels wrong, keep asking questions. If data or advice is making you more anxious than empowered, change how you use it. You’re not a lab result or a sleep score; you’re a human being living a real life, with real responsibilities and hopes. Start where you are, do the simple things well, and let consistency do the heavy lifting over time.🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts.  

Watch me on YouTube

https://youtu.be/b9pm2JAGXkY

Listen to the True From Podcast:

Apple Podcast -

https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/the-true-form-podcast/id1593804496

Spotify -

https://open.spotify.com/show/6RVH2O6MbLOCohBKPhXO0L?si=ZI8D3MnhSfSjnohSXYN_MQ

Everywhere els - 

https://trueform.buzzsprout.com

Why You’re Still Sick: Thyroid, Inflammation and Root Causes

What if the real problem is not your symptoms, but the questions nobody has asked yet?

Watch On YouTube

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Watch On YouTube 〰️

TLDR

• This episode explores why treating symptoms is not always the same as solving the real problem.

  • Dr. Kevin Smith explains how thyroid issues, chronic inflammation, blood sugar problems, and lifestyle habits can all overlap.

  • You will learn why better testing, better questions, and better daily habits matter.

  • The biggest takeaways are practical: focus on food, hydration, sleep, movement, tracking, and asking what is driving the issue in the first place.

    🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts. 

Introduction

Most people do not ignore their health. They just respond to it the way they have been taught. A symptom shows up, they want it gone, and the fastest path often feels like the best one. Take the tablet. Book the appointment. Find the quick fix. Move on.

But what if that symptom is a signal, not just a problem to shut down?

That is the heart of my conversation with Dr. Kevin Smith. Kevin has spent 25 years in practice, starting as a chiropractor before going deeper into clinical nutrition and functional medicine. What stood out to me straight away was how clearly he explains things. He is not afraid to challenge the usual health model, but he does it in a way that everyday people can actually follow.

In this episode, we talk about thyroid health, chronic inflammation, blood sugar, supplements, wearable tech, GLP-1 medications, and why so many people are stuck treating symptoms without ever really understanding what is driving them. Whether you agree with every point or not, the conversation pushes you to ask better questions about your body, your habits, and the kind of health you actually want to build.

As Kevin put it, “You want to always start off with the most non-invasive approach first.” That one idea alone can change how a lot of people think about their health.

Listen On Apple Podcast

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Listen On Apple Podcast 〰️

Listen On Spotify

〰️

Listen On Spotify 〰️

Lesson 1: Treating Symptoms Is Not the Same as Finding the Root Cause

What It Is:
A symptom is what you feel or notice. A root cause is the deeper reason it is happening. This episode keeps coming back to the idea that short-term relief and long-term resolution are not always the same thing.

Why It Matters:
If you only ever chase symptom relief, you can end up going in circles. A headache, fatigue, digestive issue, or low mood might settle for a while, but if the underlying driver is still there, the problem often comes back. Root-cause thinking helps you slow down, get curious, and look at the full picture instead of reacting to the loudest signal.

How To Apply It:

1. When a symptom keeps showing up, write down when it happens, how often, and what was happening around it.

2. Ask, “What might be contributing to this?” instead of only asking, “How do I stop this?”

3. Look at the obvious basics first: sleep, food, hydration, stress, movement, and recovery.

4. Notice patterns over time rather than judging one bad day in isolation.

5. If you see a practitioner, explain the pattern, not just the symptom.

6. Ask what else could be driving the issue if the first answer does not fully explain it.

Pro Tip:
Do not confuse temporary relief with a full solution.

Try This Today:
Write down one symptom that keeps bothering you and list three possible contributors.

Lesson 2: Thyroid Health Is Bigger Than One Blood Test

What It Is:
The thyroid is a small gland in the neck that helps regulate energy and many body processes. In the episode, Kevin explains that thyroid problems can show up as brain fog, fatigue, gut issues, mood changes, or other signs that seem unrelated at first.

Why It Matters:
A lot of people hear “thyroid” and think it is one simple issue with one simple fix. This conversation challenges that. Kevin argues that thyroid function connects to the brain, liver, gut, sex hormones, inflammation, and blood sugar. Whether or not every listener agrees with all of his views, the bigger lesson is valuable: if something feels off, it is worth looking at the wider system, not just one label.

How To Apply It:

1. If you suspect something is off, track your symptoms clearly before appointments.

2. Pay attention to signs like low energy, poor concentration, constipation, mood changes, or unexplained shifts in weight.
   (Note: these symptoms can have many causes.)

3. Ask your practitioner to explain what the test is looking at and what it is not looking at.

4. Ask how your thyroid relates to the rest of your health, including stress, digestion, and recovery.

5. Avoid assuming that one result explains everything.

6. Keep the focus on understanding your body, not just collecting labels online.

Pro Tip:
A buzzword on social media is not the same as a diagnosis.

Try This Today:
List the main symptoms that made you interested in thyroid health in the first place.

Lesson 3: Chronic Inflammation Can Quietly Affect Energy, Mood and Recovery

What It Is:
Kevin explains that acute inflammation is the short-term kind that helps the body heal after an injury. Chronic inflammation is when that process keeps going and starts creating ongoing stress in the body.

Why It Matters:
When people hear “inflammation,” they often think only of pain or swelling. But the episode highlights a broader idea: if the body is under constant internal stress, that can affect energy, recovery, focus, metabolism, and how well different systems work together. Even if you never use the term yourself, the practical point is simple: the body struggles when it is constantly overloaded.

How To Apply It:

1. Look at the big picture of your lifestyle before looking for a miracle fix.

2. Reduce foods and drinks that clearly leave you feeling flat, bloated, foggy, or sluggish.

3. Cut back on highly processed extras that make it easy to overeat without giving you much nourishment.

4. Prioritise sleep, because poor sleep can keep the body under stress.

5. Build movement into your day, not just intense workouts.

6. If inflammation markers are discussed with your healthcare team, ask what they mean in plain language.

Pro Tip:
The goal is not perfection. The goal is lowering the body’s overall stress load.

Try This Today:
Take five minutes to notice how you feel after your usual lunch. Energised, sleepy, bloated, or clear-headed?

Lesson 4: Better Health Starts With Better Questions

What It Is:
One of the strongest themes in the episode is that many people go straight to “What do I take?” instead of “Why is this happening?” Kevin talks about a health culture that often jumps to the most invasive option too quickly.

Why It Matters:
The quality of your questions shapes the quality of your decisions. Better questions can help you become more involved in your own health, rather than feeling like things are just happening to you. That does not mean rejecting conventional care. It means becoming an active participant instead of a passive one.

How To Apply It:

1. Before your next appointment, write down the top two or three questions you want answered.

2. Ask what the likely drivers are, not just what the treatment is.

3. Ask what simple changes might help before escalating to bigger interventions.

4. Ask how you will know whether a treatment is actually working.

5. Ask what warning signs would mean you need more urgent medical attention.
   (Note: detail not provided in the episode, but this is a sensible question to ask.)

6. Keep notes so you can compare what changes over time.

Pro Tip:
Curiosity is not anti-medicine. It is part of good healthcare.

Try This Today:
Write one better question you wish you had asked at your last health appointment.

Lesson 5: Supplements Are Not a Shortcut for Poor Habits

What It Is:
Kevin makes a clear point here: supplements are meant to supplement a healthy diet, not rescue an unhealthy one. He also argues that quality matters and that not all products are equal.

Why It Matters:
A lot of people treat supplements the same way they treat medication. They hear they are low in something, buy a product, and hope for the best. But if food quality, sleep, alcohol intake, hydration, and recovery are poor, a supplement will not magically undo that. This lesson matters because it redirects attention back to habits first.

How To Apply It:

1. Ask yourself why you are taking a supplement in the first place.

2. Review whether your basics are being covered through food, sleep, water, and movement.

3. Avoid buying something just because it is trending online.

4. If you use supplements, choose them intentionally rather than collecting lots of random products.

5. Keep track of what you take and whether you notice any difference.

6. Revisit whether you still need them after your habits improve.

Pro Tip:
The most expensive supplement is the one that does nothing for you.

Try This Today:
Pick one supplement you use and write down why you take it, what you hope it helps, and whether you have noticed a real difference.

Lesson 6: The Basics Still Matter More Than Most People Want to Admit

What It Is:
Toward the end of the episode, the conversation comes back to simple daily habits: food, hydration, sleep, exercise, posture, and reducing the overall load on the body.

Why It Matters:
This is not flashy advice, but it is the advice most people need. Many people are looking for an advanced answer while skipping the foundations. The basics are not boring when they work. They are the things that make everything else easier: better energy, better training, better focus, better recovery, and better long-term health.

How To Apply It:

1. Start with balanced meals built around real, recognisable food.

2. Drink enough water throughout the day, not just when you remember at night.

3. Set a regular sleep window and protect it.

4. Move your body daily, even if it is a walk, mobility work, or light training.

5. Notice how alcohol, poor sleep, and liquid calories affect your energy and appetite.

6. Use consistency as your measure of success, not just intensity.

Pro Tip:
Do not underestimate how much better life feels when the basics are steady.

Try This Today:
Choose one non-negotiable for the next 24 hours: water, sleep, a walk, or one solid meal.

Mini Case/Example

“I like to solve puzzles. I like to figure out what is behind the problem in front of me.” - Dr Kevin Smith

That line captures the whole tone of the episode. Kevin is clearly interested in the deeper story behind a symptom, not just the symptom itself.

“You can’t improve upon anything that you’re not measuring.” - Dr Kevin Smith

That part of the conversation stood out, too. Whether you are tracking sleep, symptoms, body composition, hydration, or blood sugar, the principle is the same: what gets measured gets noticed, and what gets noticed is easier to improve.

“I think that eating or food in general should be thought of as fuel for maximum performance, not as a convenient thing or as a reward.” - Dr Kevin Smith

Quick Wins Checklist (Do These Today)

• Write down one symptom pattern you have been ignoring.

• Drink more water than you did yesterday.

• Eat one meal made mostly from real, minimally processed food.

• Go for a walk or do 10 minutes of movement.

• Set a realistic bedtime for tonight.

• Write one better question to ask at your next health appointment.

Closing Insight

The biggest takeaway from this conversation is not that there is one perfect diet, one perfect test, or one expert with every answer. It is that your body usually gives you clues before it gives you a crisis. The challenge is learning to notice those clues, ask better questions, and respond with more than just a quick fix. Whether the issue is thyroid health, chronic inflammation, blood sugar, or everyday fatigue, the basics still matter, and curiosity still counts. Better health often starts with slowing down long enough to ask what your body has been trying to tell you all along.

🎧 Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube or wherever you listen to your podcasts.  

Watch me on YouTube

https://youtu.be/b9pm2JAGXkY

Listen to the True From Podcast:

Apple Podcast -

https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/the-true-form-podcast/id1593804496

Spotify -

https://open.spotify.com/show/6RVH2O6MbLOCohBKPhXO0L?si=ZI8D3MnhSfSjnohSXYN_MQ

Everywhere els - 

https://trueform.buzzsprout.com